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# LIBRARY OF CONGRESS. 



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J UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. | 






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PRACTICAL TALKS 



WITH 



SINNERS, INQUIRERS, AND CHRISTIANS. 



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McBETH. 

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en 



-o/ 



ST. LOUIS: 

J. W. McINTYEE, 

BOOKSELLER AND STATIONER, 

No. 14 South Fifth Street. 
1868. 






Ob Congress 



WASHINGTON 






Entered, according to Act of Congress, in the year 1868, by 
J. W. McINTYRE, ' 

in ttie Clerk's Office of the District Court of the United States 
for the Eastern District of Missouri. 



STEREOTTPED BT MACKELLAR, SMITHS & JORDAN, 
PHILADELPHIA. 



PREFACE. 



The following sketches are true stories. They 
have been selected, from among a great many 
similar cases, as illustrations of the different meth- 
ods which the writer proved, — in three years of spi- 
ritual labor in the hospitals, among the soldiers of 
both armies, and in years of experience elsewhere, — 
to be the most successful, in dealing with each of 
the classes described. 

The need, very deeply felt in her own work, of 

some such simple, practical, printed talks, to put 

into the hands of those with whom she labored, 

first suggested the idea of sending out the sketches 

in this form (and, if demanded, separately), in the 

hope that they might be of use to others. 

The spiritual classes described are not peculiar 

1 



2 PEEFACE. 

to any social class. They are to be found in every 
rank and condition of life. The same difficulties 
and errors exist in human hearts all around us. 
If the Sketches should be the means, in God's 
hand, of awakening one careless soul, or comforting 
a troubled Christian; of leading one self-deceiver 
to forsake his " refuge of lies," and build upon the 
** Kock of Ages ;" or of helping one inquiring soul 
to find the Saviour, — they will have accomplished 
the end for which they were written, by 

THE AUTHOR. 



CONTENTS. 



tott| MjjMrs, 



PAGE 

The Infidel 7 

The Univebsalist 19 

The Backslider 43 

The Cabeless Sinner; or, A Debtor to God ... 61 

The Moralist 79 

The Caviller at the Church and Church- 
Members 105 

Can't Understand the Bible 143 

The Standard of Eight 171 

The Caviller at Prayer 189 

The Substitute 201 

Contrasted Death-Beds 209 

1* 3 



4 CONTENTS. 



PAGE 

A Life Eestored 221 

Hindrances Eemoved 237 

The Inquirer Halting at Kepentance and Faith 255 

The Inquirer Unconsciously Unwilling 287 

The Inquirer under the Burden of His Sins. 

(How to Come to Jesus) 305 

fells totti MMSlttTO^. 

The Young Convert 333 

The Neglected Opportunity 377 

Heaven 385 



THE INFIDEL. 



THE INFIDEL. 



^^If I am not very much mistaken, this is 
the lady that told me I was an infidel/^ 

'' 1, friend ? When did I tell you that ?' 

I had noticed him standing near me, as I 

talked with , one evening, but, simply 

glancing at him as I came up to them, I 
had taken him for a stranger. Even now, 
after a good look into the intelligent, manly 
face before me, I failed to recognize it. 

"Where did I see you before? I do not 
remember." 

" Over in Ward No. 9, some months ago. I 
was sitting by the library, twice, when you 
came up to it to put some letter-paper and en- 
velopes for the boys, in the box, and both 
times you had a long talk with me. The first 



6 THB INFIDEL. 

time, there was a gentleman with you, and 
when he offered me some of his tracts, I 
wouldn't take them. I told him they might 
do for children or weak-minded persons, but I 
had too strong a mind to believe in any such 
stuff.'' 

^^Oh, are you the one? You have changed 
a great deal. Where have you been since 
then? I often wondered what had become of 
you?" 

^^ They put me on duty in one of the kit- 
chens, and I could not see you after that; but 
I knew you the minute you stood beside me to- 
night, and I have not forgotten one word you 
said to me." 

^^What did I say to you, friend? I have 
forgotten, — I talk to so many. Sit down on 
this bench (I am tired), and tell me." 

^^I was reading ^Nelson on Infidelity,' the 
first time when you came up, and after the 
gentleman went away you looked at it, and 
asked me if I needed^ to read such a book as 
that. I told you that I was only reading it 
to pass away the time; that I didn't believe in 



THE INFIDEL. 7 

such stuff as he wrote. You said that it did not 
make the least difference in the truths whether 
I believed it or not. My thinking any thing 
was not true^ did not make it so. I might 
really think (if I was ^colour-blind') that the 
little red book you had in your hand was 
green, but my thinking so would not change 
its colour. I might really believe that I would 
never die, but death would come to me just as 
surely for all that. I might believe that there 
w^as no God, no heaven, no hell ; but my think- 
ing so would not blot them out. God's laws 
were just as binding on me all the time, and 
everywhere, as if I acknowledged them. Heaven 
or hell was waiting for me all the same, 
whether I ever thought of them or not. You 
said, too, that I need not tell you that I did 
not believe the Bible, for I did. I was only 
trying to think it was not true because I ivished 
it was not; I did not want to acknowledge 
God's claim on me; that my infidel creed did 
not satisfy me, and never would, even if I 
could believe it. 

"I did not like to be called an infidel, but 



8 THE INFIDEL. 

it was the true name for me. I had been a 
very wicked boy, and I linew it, and I did not 
like to think I should be called to account for 
it, and so I tried hard to persuade myself that 
there was no God, no heaven, no hell; and I 
had almost got to believe it, when you came to 
me that day.^^ 

"But you think differently now?'^ (Some- 
thing in his face and tone told me he was 
changed.) 

"Yes, very differently ^^^ he said, earnestly. 
"You said,'^ he continued, "^Even according to 
your boasted "reason,^^ it is the part of a wise 
man to be on the safe side. If your creed is 
true (as it is not), the Christian will be equal 
gainer with you at death; but if the Christianas 
creed be true (as you hnow it is), he gains all 
then, and you lose all.^ 

"The last time, after you had talked with 
me nearly an hour, as you rose to leave, you 
said, ^ Don't run any risks in this matter, 
friend; your soul is too precious for that. If 
you had a dozen souls, you might trifle with 
one, or even lose it, and still have eleven left ; 

10 



THE INFIDEL. 9 

but one soul is your all, and if you lose that, 
it is lost forever. Don^t make any mistakes, 
either; for if you do, you cannot come back to 
this world and make it all right again. If, 
when you come to the end of the road, you 
find you have taken the wrong one, it is too 
late to turn into the right one then. A mis- 
take here costs you your soul for eternity/ ^^ 

^^So, you have remembered well. What 
thenf^ 

^^The words kept following me wherever I 
went, for a long time,^^ he said; "and then the 
Eev. Mr. B. got hold of me, and took me to the 
prayer-meeting. I never felt so in my life. 
Something — I could not tell what it was — kept 
urging me to get up and tell how I felt; and 
as one after another of the boys rose for 
prayers, I could almost hear the words, ^ Get 
up, and ask them to pray for you too.' I 
caught myself almost looking round, once or 
twice, to see who spoke them.'' 

^^ The voice was in your heart, friend : it was 
God's Spirit striving with you." 

" Yes ; but I did not know it then, and so I 

2 11 



10 THE INFIDEL. 

fought against it. I said to myself, ' Don't be 
such a fool, P., as to get up and ask for prayers 
before all the boys; they will laugh at you/ 
But at last I couldn't keep my seat any longer, 
and I just got up before that houseful, and told 
them all, and asked them to pray for me." 

^^And then — ?'' I said, as he paused. 

" I began to pray for myself too. I believe in 
God now,'' he added, in a low, earnest tone, 
"because I have found him as my Saviour." 

" Oh, thank God for that, friend ! I am so 
glad, so glad! Oh, you don't know how happy 
that makes me!" 

I could have cried for joy then that this lost 
soul was found; and there was "joy in heaven," 
too, I know, when that story was first repeated 
in its courts. 

I found very few infidels in the hospitals, 
— perhaps not more than twelve or fifteen in 
nearly three years. I kept count to the ninth. 
I remember telling him, " I have spent the 
most of my time in hospitals for more than 
two years, friend, and have talked with hun- 
dreds, perhaps thousands, in that time, about 

12 



THE INFIDEL. 11 

their souls^ and you are the ninth infidel I have 
found among them all/' 

^^Oh^ don't call me an infidel! I am not 
one/' 

I can still see the deprecating look in the 
pale^ intellectual face, as it half started from the 
pillow in horror at the tn ought. 

^^The 7iame makes little difference, friend. 
There is where you really stand." And before 
I left he promised to begin to pray that 
night. 

I do not think I could have found so few 
infidels among an equal number of citizens; and 
I think the reason of it is this. The most of 
these men had faced death before they came to 
me, and that clears away the mists and shows 
things in their true light. There is only one 
hope that death cannot strike from our grasp, 
then, and that is anchored on the "Rock of 
Ages." (I have been, tw^ice in my life, so near 
tlie next world that I could almost see into 
it; and I hioio that this is true.) Then, too, 
on picket or vedette duty, on the night be- 
fore the battle, or in the awful stillness which 

13 



12 THE INFIDEL. 

precedes the first volley from the enemy's 
ranks^ God's voice makes itself audible to 
their souls, as it does not in the busy hum 
and cares of home-life. They are forced to 
feel its truth. 

It came to them in the quiet of the hos- 
pital, too. Lying among strangers, Avith no- 
thing to do but to think and suffer through 
the long, weary nights and days, seeing their 
comrades carried from beside them to the '^ dead- . 
house,'' and not knowing how soon they might 
follow them, — oh, these things had a very dif- 
ferent look then. 

I had a theory that no one could, in the 
quiet of a sick-bed, retain his full conscious- 
ness and go down to the brink of the grave 
expecting to topple into it every moment, and 
then come back to life again an infidel; and I 
have proved it to my full content. I have 
asked each one of those I have met, '^AVere 
you ever so sick in your life that you felt sure 
yoki were dying?" and the answer has inva- 
riably been, ^^No." "You told me," said P., 
" that you hieiv I had never been so sick that 

14 



THE INFIDEL. 1 



o 



I thought I was dying ; and it was true. I 
never had.^^ 

I have never seen an infidel die. That is a 
strange experience for one who has looked on 
death so often. But I have stood beside the 
cots of those w^ho w'ere, or tried to be^ infidels, 
in the camp^ in the w^orkshop, on the farm, or 
in the office, and have seen them when they 
were awake to the fact that they had played 
their game of life and lost, and watched them 
go into eternity in such horror and darkness as 
I pray I may never look upon again. 

We shrink from the name of infidel ; and yet 
there is too much practical infidelity abroad in our 
land, even among nominal Christians. We say 
that we believe in eternity ; and yet we act too 
much as if there was no other w^orld than this. 
If we really believed in heaven, we should try 
more earnestly not only to get into it ourselves, 
but to take our dear ones Avith us. If we really 
believed in hell, we should try harder not only 
to keep out of it ourselves, but to prevent those 
around us from going there. If we really be- 
lieved that the Bible was given us as the rule of 

2- 15 



14 THE INFIDEL. 

our lives, we should consult it oftcner, and 
strive to follow its precepts more closely. If 
we really believed what it tells us of God, he 
would be oftener in our thoughts, and the love 
of God in Christ be more fully ''shed abroad'' 
in our hearts and lives. 



Ki 



THE UNIYERSALIST. 



THE UNIVERSALIST. 



After the war was ended^ and when the 
sick and wounded who were able to travel, were 
being sent from the hospitals to their homes 
almost daily, the few patients still remaining in 
the eye-infirmary of the ^^A^^ Hospital were 
transferred to one end of the long ward " W/^ 
which was fitted up for their use. A melodeon 
was placed here ; and visitors used sometimes to 
play for the men, while they, and the convales- 
cents from the upper part of the ward, would 
join in singing from the soldiers^ hymn-books 
or the little music-books scattered freely for 
their use. 

Going into the ward one day in company 
with some friends, while they and the conva- 
lescents were singing for the blind, I sat down 
3 19 



4 THE UNIVERSALIST. 

beside one of the wounded boys in tlie upper part 
of the ward, and began talking to him about his 
soul. 

As we talked, a nurse, wlio had come vrith 
the last boat-load from the South, came up to 
us, and listened for a little while, and then 
seated himself on a cot near us. 

He v;as a middle-aged man, whom I had not 
seen before. I did not know whether he was a 
Christian, or not; and so, in order to learn, I 
would now and then appeal to him, as I as- 
serted a truth, ^^sn't that true?'' 

He answered cautiously, sometimes almost 
reluctantly, or as if his heart did not give full 
assent to what he said ; and when at last I 
asked him a more pointed question on some of 
the vital truths of the Christian religion, he said, 
^^I suppose so; but, then, I don't think on these 
subjects like a great many other persons do.'' 
'' But you believe the Bible, don't you, friend ?" 
*' Yes," he said, slowly; ^^a part of it, at least." 
^^ What part of it don't you believe?" 
"Well, I don't believe wdiat some find in it 
about a hell." 

20 



THE UXIYERSALIST. 5 

^^Oh! a Universalistr 

He winced a little. " Yes, that is what they 
call us, I believe/^ 

^^But ^heir is in the Bible/ friend. What 
will you do with it? If you take out hell^ I 
have an equal right to take out heaven, and 
some one else might w^ant to take out immor- 
tality. 

'' We can^t pick out parts from the Bible and 
leave the rest. We must take all, or none.^ 

^^If you take away Genesis, I have an equal 
right to take away Matthev/, and some one else 
to take away Revelation; and so, by each one 
taking out what he doesn^t want to believe, we 
w^ould soon have no Bible at all/^ 

" But I don^t believe that the passages in the 
Bible, vfhere it speaks of hell, mean a place of 
everlasting punishment, as some say they do/^ 

^^But the very same loords {aion, and aionios), 
and used in the same conneGtion^ sometimes, 
that in the original describe the time in which 
ffle wicked shall be punished in hell, are used 

iJude6,7. Luke 16 : 23, 24. Psalm 9: 17. 2Tliess. 1:9. 
2 Kev. 22 : 19. ^ Matt. 25 : 46. 

21 



b THE UXIVERSALLST. 

to denote the length of time in which the re- 
deemed shall be happy in heaven: so that, if 
the one are not to stay forever in hell, then 
neither are the other to live always in heaven ; 
and it would be no heaven to you, after you 
reached it, if you felt that there w^as a time 
coming when you would have to leave it, and 
you did not know where you would be sent 
to/' 

'' But, then, to punish a man forever, just for 
the sins he committed the little time he lived 
in this world, — it doesn^t seem reasonable/' 

'' But that sin was against an infinite God, 
you must remember ; and the punishment of a 
sin, even in this world, is never measured by 
the time it takes a man to commit the sin. 

'' Human laws punish a man for life, for a 
crime that he accomplished in a few minutes. 
They take away his life (the utmost limit of 
their power to punish him), sometimes, for an 
act which lasted scarcely more than a moment. 

"God's power, and man's life in His siglS, 
reaches out into eternity ; and God offers men a 
lifeof eternal happiness, freely, and pleads with 

22 



THE UNIVEESALIST. 7 

them to accept it, and yet they refuse to listen 
to Him, and persist in disobeying Him, and defy 
the consequences; and it is only just that they 
should suffer them. 

"But do you believe that there is any hell at 
allf^ 

There is such a variety of shades of belief 
among Universalists. I have never met two 
who had exactly the same creed. Some believe 
that a man receives his punishment for wrong- 
doing, in this life ; and others, as they w^atch 
the wicked prospering to the end, say that his 
conscience punished him in secret for his sins ; 
and others, when they see a man whose con- 
science is so seared as scarcely to make itself 
felt when he does wrong, or a man cut down 
in the very act of sinning, before his conscience 
couM be reached at all, extend the punishment 
for a little distance into the next w^orlcl, — into a 
kind of purgatory, where such shall be purified 
from sin and then admitted into heaven. 

Some say that Jesus was God, and His death 
saved all men from all punishment; others, 
that He was only a good man, sent simply to 

3 23 



8 THE UNIVERSALIST. 

be an example to us, &c. &c. Tlicrefore I 
asked him, ^^Do you believe there is any 
hell?'^ 

"No/' lie said, slowly; "I don't. I believe 
that God is too full of love and mercy, to 
make such a place as hell for men, and then 
send them there to suffer forever/' 

" God did not make hell for man, friend : the 
Bible tells you that. It tells you that hell was 
^ prepared for the devil and his angels,' ^ v/hen 
they sinned;^ and God, instead of sending any 
there against their wnll, pleads with them not 
to go to it, — to turn out of the road that leads 
to itf and, to show how much He w^anted men 
to be saved from going there. He gave his only 
Son to come to this world and suffer the pun- 
ishment of the sins of everv one who w^ould 
turn to Him and be saved.^ He only sends 
those there who persist in disobeying Him and 
refuse that offered Saviour, because their ' de- 
struction is inseparable from the preservation 
of His own glory, and for the highest good of 



1 Matt. 25 : 41. 2 j^^^i^ 

24 



3 Ezek. IS : 31, 32. * John 3 : 16. 



THE UNIVERSALIST. 9 

His kingdom.' For illustration : how many little 
children have you at home^ friend V^ 

"Five/' 

"Suppose that one of them should rebel 
against your authority, and disobey your com- 
mands continually, and the others should see 
you pass his conduct by without any notice. 
What effect do you think it would have upon 
them?'' 

" Well, they would think that they could do 
so too, I suppose." 

" What would they be apt to think of you .^" 

" Well, I suppose they would lose all respect 
for me, after a while, and wouldn't feel like 
minding any thing I said to them." 

"And if you lost your control over them, 
they would be very apt to go to ruin them- 
selves, too. 

" Xow, suppose that the word should go out 
among the angels, and among all the worlds 
that you see twinkling in the sky at night, that 
a little world — one of the least of God's crea- 
tion — had rebelled against His government, and 
disobeyed His commands continually, and He 



10 THE UNIVERSALIST. 

had passed by the offence without any notice : 
the others would soon lose their respect for God, 
and feel that they could disobey Him without 
fear too ; and there would soon be anarchy and 
confusion all over the universe of His creation, 
and that universe itself would soon crumble into 
ruin. 

" It is necessary to the existence and con- 
tinuance of God^s moral government, that sin 
should be punished. A government which lets 
the guilty go free is no government at all.^^ 

I waited a moment for him to speak ; but he 
still did not answer. 

" What ivould you do in heaven, friend, if 
God should let you go into it to-day V^ 

He looked up inquiringly. " Do f^ 

'' Yes. You don^t love God. You don't like 
to think about Him, or hear or read about Him. 
You would not be happy in His presence forever. 

" You scarcely ever think of heaven : it does 
not seem a pleasant place to you at all : there 
is nothing in it that you like well enough to 
make you want to go to it. 

^^ You do not really icant to go to heaven at alt, 

26 



THE UNIVERSALIST. 11 

If God should give you your choice to-day, you 
would rather stay in this world forever, than 
leave it, to go there. Is that true?^^ 

'' I believe you are about right there, I must 
confess/^ And there was conviction in his tones, 
and more interest than he had shown before. 

'^ I don^t know how you stand in the eyes of 
the world, friend ; you may be what is called 
a ' mora? man ; but you have at least seen 
those who you knew were loicJced men : haven^t 

"Yes, indeed I have, — plenty of them.^^ 

"You have seen the strong abuse the. weak, 
and wicked men — when they had the power — 
tyrannize over and oppress the good, and yet 
go unpunished : haven^t you ?'^ 

"Yes, I have; many a time.^^ 

"You have seen men get into offices of 
power and trust, by every kind of wrong- 
doing, and then use that power and influence 
for their own selfish purposes, at the expense of 
others, and yet stand fair in the eyes of the 
world. 

"You have seen men grow rich by every 

3^;* 27 



12 THE UNIVERSALIST. 

kind of dishonesty^ by every kind of sin, and 
yet escape the punishment of human laws, and 
enjoy the fruits of their wickedness to the end 
of their lives, ^vhile good men had to suffer for 
their sin : haven't you V^ 

"Yes, indeed, I have.'' 

" Now, God is a God of justice,^ as well as of 
love and mercy ; and it is neither justice^ nor 
love^ nor mercy, to the good, to let them suffer for 
the wrong-doing of others, while the wicked, 
who caused the wrong, go free, because they have 
the power to oppress, or to turn aside the laws. 

"You have seen enough to make you feel 
that there ought to be a day of reckoning for 
such men, and a time when such wrongs will 
be righted, and a place where the guilty will 
be punished ; and you don't find that time and 
place in this world: you will have to take God^s 
word for it that you will find them in the next,^ 

" Even in your short lifetime, you have seen 
injustice triumph, and wicked men prosper in 

1 Deiit. 32 : 4. Psalm 89 : 14. 

2 Acts 17: 31. John 5 : 28, 29. 2 Cor. 5 : 10. Koiii. 
2 : 6-11. Matt. 25 : 31-46. 

28 



/ 



THE UNIVEESALIST. 13 

every kind of wrong-doing, enough to make 
you feel that there ought to be a hell for such 
men to go into when they leave this world. 

^^You have been made to feel that more 
than once, although you tried to drive the 
thought from your mind/' 

" Thafs triie/^ said the wounded boy, who 
had been listening earnestly as we talked. " IVe 
seen enough myself to have been made to feel 
that/' 

'^ Now, you cannot prove that there is no hell, 
friend. Your reason tells you that there ought 
to be one ; and the Bible tells you that there is 
one. Your thinking that there is 7iot will not 
blot it out of existence. Truth stands the same 
alwa}^, whether we believe it or not. Our be- 
lief has not the least effect on any thing but 
ourselves; and, for this reason, we ought to be 
very sure that we believe the right thing. 

'' But you are only trying to believe that there 
is no place of future punishment for the wicked, 
because you want to believe it. 

" It would be very pleasant for you to feel 
that you could live just as you pleased while 

29 



14 THE UNIVERSALIST. 

you were in this world, and yet get into heaven 
when you had done with it. 

^^But God's Sj)irit has touched your heart, 
time and again, and made you feel how false 
your creed was, — made you feel what a sinner 
you were in His sight; and so you tried to drive 
it away with the thought that ' God was too full 
of love and mercy to punish you/ But you 
cannot feel sure of it, and never will ; and it is 
not wise to try to cheat your soul into its belief. 

'^ You will have to go out of this world some 
time, friend, whether you want to or not; and 
the wisest plan is for you to be prepared for the 
very worst that can meet you beyond it.^ 

^' The only unse plan is for you to get ready 
for heaven in the way that God has appointed. 

" If you are a Christian, and there is no hell, 
you gain heaven just the same, and lose nothing. 

" If there is a hell, and you do not try to 
avoid it, you lose heaven, and lose your own 
soul forever. Have you got good enough out 
of this world, so far in your lifetime, friend, to 
pay you for running such a risk f^ 

1 Ileb. 9 : 27. 
30 



THE UNIVEESALIST. 15 

^^ No : I have not^^ he said^ earnestly. 

" This world will not give you any better 
happiness for the rest of the road^ although you 
may think now that it will. Has it been plea- 
sant enough to make you willing to do with- 
out heaven when you are done with it ?'^ 

" No, indeed, it has not.'^ 

"You could not find a heaven any place in 
the universe, as you are to-day, friend; and if 
you, who may be what is called a ' moral man,^ 
could not be happy with God now, where will 
some of those wicked men whom you have seen 
and heard find it ? 

"Let us try to follow one of them, as he 
leaves this world to seek it. 

"A soldier in Ward told me, the other 

day, that a wicked man in his regiment was shot 
dead in battle, with an unfinished oath upon his 
lips. 

"Now, w^e will suppose that, as you say, there 
is no hell, and that that soldier^s soul went 
straight from that battle-field to heaven. 

"The very first thing he sees, as he goes in 
there, is God^s eye looking right at him, — look- 

31 



16 THE UNIVERSALIST. 

ing clear through and through his naked^ guilty 
soul, — that God whose holy name the very last 
act of his life was to profane. 

" He carries his memory with him into the 
next world.^ He remembers how he has treated 
God for a lifetime, — how he disobeyed Him, 
and called Him names, and treated Him with 
contempt or indifference, and, perhaps, made 
sport of Him, and denied Him, and ridiculed 
His word and His people, and every thing that 
belonged to Him. 

'' He knows now that that eye has followed 
him at every step of his road on earth.^ He 
tries to look up, and he finds himself face to 
face with that dear Saviour whom he had de- 
spised and rejected, and, perhaps, denied; whose 
name had perhaps never been upon his lips 
except in an oath, and that eye which looked 
down from Calvary in agony for his sins, look- 
ing through and through his guilty soul, stained 
with all its sins. 

^^How do you think that man would feel? 

1 Luke 16 : 23, 24, 27, 28. 

2 Prov. 5 : 21. Prov. 15 : 3. 2 Chron. 16 : 9. 
32 



THE UNIVERSALIST. 17 

" I tell you, friend, you may say that ^ helP 
means ^the grave/ or the Walley of Hinnom' 
near Jerusalem, or that there is no such word 
at all ; but it would be hell for that man right 
beside the throne of God ; and he would be glad 
at that moment to be sent away to such a place, 
to try to get out of the presence of that all- 
searching, awful Eye/^^ 

^^That^s true,^^ said the wounded boy, ear- 
nestly. 

'' He turns away to try to escape from it, and 
he finds himself among those w^ho had loved 
God on earth. 

" He remembers how he used to talk about 
them, and treat them, and hate them, when he 
knew them in this world. 

^^His nature is not changed: he hates them 
still; he does not find their society any more 
cono-enial there. He sees amousc them some 
whom he has wronged and ill-treated ; and the 
sight adds to his torment. 

'^ There is no heaven for his guilty soul 
among them? 

1 Eev. 6 : 16, 17. 2 pg^im 34 : 7-13, 21. 

33 



18 THE UNIVERSALIST. 

"That Eye is still following him/ and he 
tries to hide from it among the angels. 

"What would he do in their pure presence? 
There is no heaven for him among such as 
they. 

"What Avill he do? How will he spend his 
long eternity? He is cut off from all that he 
enjoyed on earth. He loves sin still: he cannot 
get it there. He hates purity and holiness 
still : what wdll he do where all are pure and 
holy?2 

" It will be hell for that man even within the 
very courts of heaven.^^ 

" I believe you are right.^^ 

" Suppose still (as you say) that there is no 
other world for men, and that all who have ever 
lived here, have gone there. 

"As he turns away, he finds some who were 
his wicked companions on earth, and some even 
worse than they. 

" He finds himself among murderers and 
thieves and robbers, and men whom human 



1 Psalm 139. ^ ^^^ 21 : 27. Kev. 22 : 14, 15. 

34 



THE UNIVEESALIST. 19 

laws (01107^6 just than God^^ according to your 
creed) shut up in jails and penitentiaries, or 
sent out of this world by death, as too vile to 
live among their fellow-men ; and yet God has let 
them come up to spend an eternity among their 
innocent victims, and among the good, — among 
those who hated sin and loved God on earth. 

" What kind of a heaven would it be, do you 
think, with such men in it, with their hearts 
unchanged and as full of sin as ever ? 

'^ How would you feel, if you were shut up 
among such men for a lifetime, even ? 

" Wherever such men were gathered together 
here, they made a hell on earth ; and wherever 
such as they are gathered together, they will 
maJce a hell, even within the very walls of heaven J ^ 

'' You are right there. That's the truth,'' he 
said, emphatically. 

^' It would neither be just nor kind, to let 

such men go in among those who shrank from 

their society on earth,— to let them live forever 

among those who had loved and obeyed God 

here. 

1 Job 4 : 17. 

4 35 



20 THE UNIVERSALIST. 

^^ There would be no heaven at all for the 
goodj with such men contmually beside them. 

" It would be no act of love and mercy to 
keep such men for an eternity face to face with 
that God whom they hate still ; to keep their 
guilty souls forever under the gaze of that all- 
searching Eye which now they know read their 
most secret thought on earth ;^ whose visible 
presence is before them^ and looking through 
them, to the farthest limits of His kingdom 
above. 

" To let such men go in among pure spirits, 
whose presence w^ould make their own guilt 
seem darker, — I think, if those men had their 
choice, they would rather be shut up in a world 
by themselves, or with other lost spirits like 
themselves, than stay there.^^ 

" I believe you are right.^^ 

^^ Then, if there is no hell, Satan and his 
legions are in heaven too. 

" I think I would rather not go into such a 
place as that would be, friend. 

" I can keep away from evil influences and 

1 Psalm 44: 21. 
36 



THE UNIVERSALIST. 21 

evil men here; but there I would have them 
around me forever. 

" No : your creed will not do, friend. If there 
is no hell for the tvicked, then neither is there 
any heaven for the good. 

" If all go to the same place after death, that 
place can never be a heaven. 

" Your creed has neither reason nor revela- 
tion to rest on, friend. Do not venture your 
soul upon it. 

" There is only one way in which the sinner 
can find a heaven anywhere in the universe of 
God ; and that is, in the way marked out for 
him in the Bible, — by giving his heart to Jesus, 
and letting Him w^ash it from sin, and change 
it by His Spirit, and prepare it for heaven, while 
he is upon the earth. 

" ^ Marvel not that I said unto thee, Ye must 
be born again f'^ for ^ Except a man be born 
from above,^ before he leaves this world, and 
have his nature and his tastes changed from 
what they are by nature, ^ he cannot enter into 
the kingdom of God'.^^^ 

1 John 3:7. 2 John 3 : 3, 5. 

37 



22 THE UNIVERSALIST. 

Before I left, he promised me that he would 
try not to make any mistakes about his soul; 
that he would try, God helping him, to give 
himself to Christ, and seek an eternity of hap- 
piness only through Him. 

I had no opportunity for another conversa- 
tion with him before he was discharged and 
sent home ; and so I will have to wait until the 
judgment to know if he redeemed his promise. 

But the next time I saw the wounded boy, 
he had (I trust) given his heart to Jesus and 
found the "way^^ to heaven in Him. He found 
a little foretaste of it in his heart down here, 
even, I used to think, sometimes, as I watched 
his happy face moving around the ward, — happy 
even while his hands grasped the crutches that 
he might have to use for a lifetime. As soon 
as he was able to travel, he too w^as discharged, 
and went home. 

I have not found many Universalists in the 
hospitals. Men passing through such scenes as 
they had passed through, have been forced to 
feel the necessity of some place of future pun- 
ishment, and have been placed in situations 

38 



THE UNIVEESALIST. 23 

where they felt such false foundations shake 
beneath them, as they perhaps never would 
have done had they remained at home. Even 
there, few who profess such creeds (perhaps none 
except the very ignorant) are without some mis- 
givings as to their truth. 

^' I have been a member of the Universalist 
church for years/^ said an intelligent soldier, who 
was seeking Jesus as the door ^ to heaven, and 
who, I trust, found Him. 

" I tried hard to believe its doctrines, because 
I wanted to believe them. I read their books 
and listened to their preaching ; but, all I could do, 
this thought would come into my mind : — ^ What 
if there should be a hell, after all f I could not 
feel sure that there was not; and I could not 
find any real rest or comfort in their creed. ^^ 

Passing down one side of Ward , one day, 

among some new^ patients from the Lower Mis- 
sissippi, a sick soldier on an opposite cot (l^o. 
80) beckoned me to come to him. 

^^I want you to pray with me and talk to 

me about these things too,^^ he said, as I bent 

1 John 10 : 9. 

4^ 39 



24 THE UXIVERSALIST. 

over him. ^^ I have tried to be a Universalist 
all my life, and I thought I was one ; but I find 
Universalism may do to live by, but it wonH do to 
die by. I begin to feel that there is a hell. I 
am afraid I shall have to die now. I can^t last 
much longer ; and, oh, I am not i^eady ^^ 

A few nights afterwards, the nurse was at- 
tending to some of the patients at the other end 
of the long ward ; and when he came back he 
found ^' No. 80'^ on his knees beside his cot, 
dead. With his dying strength he had crawled 
out of his bed to pray ; and in that posture the 
Master sent for him. 

Yes, Universalism, or any other ^^ ism" not 
founded on the word of God, may ^^ do to live 
by ;'^ but he who builds his hopes for eternity 
on any thing else than the Rock Christ Jesus, as 
He is offered to us in the gospel, builds '' his house 
upon the sand;'^^ and when the tides of death 
close around it, then it is washed away, and the 
poor, shivering, frightened soul drifts out into 
the dark, stormy ocean of eternity, alone, with- 
out an anchor and without a hope. 

^ Psalin 18 ; 2. 1 Cor. 3:11. Matt. 7 : 24-28. ' 
40 



THE BACKSLIDEE. 



THE BACKSLIDER. 



" I DID think I was a Christian^ once. I be- 
longed to the church before I came into the 
army/^ 

How many times we listened to these w^ords 
in the hospitals ! and how sad the condition of 
the backslider or self-deceived one! — worse, if 
possible, than of those who never thought they 
were Christians at all. Their former expe- 
rience makes them doubt and hold back, afraid 
to trust a hope that has failed them once, and 
almost makes them doubt the reality of religion 
itself. 

We listened to those words again, one day, 
from the lips of No. 9, as we sat beside his cot, 
talking to him of Jesus. 

"And why are you not a Christian now ?" I 

3 43 



4 THE BACKSLIDER. 

asked. "You know the Saviour promised to be 
with His disciples ^alway, even to the end.^ I 
know that you have a great many temptations 
in the army, that you do not have at home; 
^but God is faithful/ who promised that He 
will not suffer His people to be tempted above 
that they are able to bear, but will, with the 
temptation, also ' make a way to escape.^ ^ And 
the Saviour Himself was in all points tempted 
like as we are, yet without sin, and is able to 
succour them that are tempted.^ His grace is 
sufficient for all His people's needs ; His strength 
is made perfect in their weakness.^ But do you 
think you ever really did belong to Himf or did 
you only belong to the church f^ 

" I don't know,'' was the sad answer. " I 
thought I was all right once; but I have got so 
far out of the way, I doubt it now." 

"You see, a great many belong to church, 
who, I am afraid, do not belong to Jesus. A 
great many have their names written in the 
church-books, who, I am afraid, do not have 

1 1 Cor. 10 : 13. ^ Heb. 2 : 18. Ileb. 4 : 15. 

3 2 Cor. 12 : 9. 
44 



THE BACKSLIDER. 5 

them written in the Lamb's Book of Life. ' By 
their fruits ye shall know them.' ^ 

"You have seen both kinds in the army. 
You have seen two men, perhaps in the same 
regiment, whom you knew at home. Both of 
their names stood fair on the church-books there. 
You could not point to one and say, ^jffe is a 
true Christian/ and to the other and say, ' He is 
not;' because both seemed to be what they pro- 
fessed. But one of them, when he got away 
from home-influences, among strangers, where 
he thought the church would never hear of his 
doings, very soon became as bad as any one 
around him ; while the other remembered that 
he could not go to any place where God could 
not see him. There was no road so lonely, no 
night so dark, as to hide from His eye ; no sin 
so secret that He did not know. He remem- 
bered, too, that all the time, and every v>^here, 
that writing down of word and look and act 
and thought, v/as going on in God's book; and 
he loved God, and feared to disobey Him ; and 
so he tried to obey His orders just the same as 



45 



6 THE BACKSLIDER. 

if he was home. He belonged to Jesus ; the 
other only belonged to church,^^ 

'' I have seen that very thing in my own 
company/' said a convalescent, who, with several 
others, had come up while we w^ere talking. 

" Being a Christian means belonging to Christ, 
If you belong to Him, you are a Christian, no 
matter by what church-name you may be called. 
If you do not belong to Him, you may belong 
to every church in the country, and that will 
not save you. If Jesus is your Captain, and 
your ^pass^ is signed with His name, when you 
go up to the gate of heaven you can get in. 
If it is signed ' Church-Member,^ ' Morality,' 
' Good Deeds,' ' Feelings,' or any other name, 
you cannot; because Hhere is none other name 
under heaven given among men whereby we 
must be saved,' but the name of Christ.^ 

^^ If you have ever with your whole heart ac- 
cepted Him as your Saviour, and are resting on 
Him alone for salvation ; if you have ever 
made an unconditional surrender of your whole 
self, soul and body, both for this ^vorld and the 

1 Acts 4 : 12. 
46 



THE BACKSLIDER. 7 

next, into the hands of Jesns^ to do with you 
just as He pleases, and truly belong to Him, you 
are safe. He has promised to be with you while 
you stay in this world,^ to come for you when- 
you die,^ and to claim you in the jiidgment.^ 

^'When that last ' Eoll-CalF sounds,^ which 
you and every one must answer, — in that last 
grand ^Inspection-Day,^ when you and I and all 
the world must appear before the judgment-seat 
of Christ, to give an account for the deeds 
done in the body, whether they be good or bad,^ 
if you have no friend on the other side strong 
enough to help you, what will you do ? 

^^The strongest man on earth cannot save 
you : he cannot save himself. The churcli 
cannot help you : there is no church there, but 
of those who belong to Christ. If you stand 
there alone, with all your sins upon you, you 
are lost. 

"When God^s ^account-books' are opened 



1 Matt. 28 : 20. ^ Jq^^^ 14 : 3. ^ Matt. 25 : 34. 

^ 1 Cor. 15 : 52. 

5 Eom. 14 : 10-12. Matt. 25 : 31-46. Rom. 2:6. 2 

Cor. 5 : 10. 

5 47 



8 THE BACKSLIDER. 

that day^ if there is one single sin standing 
under your name^ you cannot get into heaven. 
God will not let one single sin go in there. It 
would not be heaven any longer if He did. 

" If you have never done one sinful act in 
your life, if you have never said one sinful 
wordj if you have only one sinful thought 
standing under your name that day^ you cannot 
take that one sinful thought into heaven, and it 
is too late to get rid of it there : so you must 
stay outside forever.^^ 

^^Who then/^ said a middle-aged soldier, on 
the next cot, v/ho had told me he was a Chris- 
tian, — ^^who then can be saved? for there is no 
man living but has more than one sin written 
against him.^' 

^^ That's true, brother. You and I, and all, 
know that there are a great many sins written 
under each of our names, — things God told us to 
do, which we have not done; things He told us 
not to do, w^hich w^e did; broken laws whose 
penalty we must pay, if we have not been re- 
deemed before. You have gone a long way in 
God^s debty brother; and if that debt is still 

48 



TPIE EACKSLIDEK. d 

standing against you that day^ you cannot pay 
it, and so you are lost. But/'^ I said, opening a 
book I had in my hand, and pointing to the 
opposite pages as I spoke, ^^if you really and 
t7'uly belong to Jesus, that debt is taken out 
from undei^ your name, and put under the name 
of Christ It is charged to His account, and He 
has paid it for eveiy one who belongs to Him,^ 
— paid it on Calvary (you know what a price it 
cost Him) ; and so it does not stand against yoit 
any more.^ You stand clear in God^s sight, 
just as if you had never committed a sin in the 
world.^ ^The blood of Jesus Christ His Son 
cleanseth us from all sin/^ 

^^And then will Jesus claim you. He Vvdll 
say, ^Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit 
the kingdom prepared for you from the founda- 
tion of the world.^ ^ He says He will confess 
you before His Father and before His angels;^ 
that is, He will acknowledge that you are His. 
He is the Judge Himself; and if the Judge 
Himself is your Friend, and you are His, you 

1 Isa. 53. 2 Col. 2 : 14. ^ jj^i)^ iq : 17. ^1 John 1 : 7. 
5 Matt. 25 : 34. « x^ev. 3 : 5. Luke 12 : 8. Matt. ] : 32. 

49 



10 THE BACKSLIDER. 

are safe. He is stronger than death and the 
grave, stronger than hell and the judgment, 
and will bring you off ^more than conqueror' 
over them all. 

" That one simple fact, that you belong to 
Christ, is all that will save you then ; and the 
question for you to settle now is, ^Am I His, or 
am I not ?' 

" We cannot study this question too closely, 
because there is very great danger of our deceiving 
even ourselves. There is such a thing as thinking 
we are on the road to heaven, when we are not 
Christ Himself says so ;^ and what a terrible thing 
it would be to go up to the very gate of heaven 
(if that were possible), thinking we w^ere going 
right in, and hear, instead, the words, ^Depart; 
I never knew you.' We have much need to ^ exa- 
mine ourselves, whether we be in the faith,' ^ here. 
We cannot come back to earth and get on the 
riglit road then, if w^e have made a mistake. 

^^If it was only a question that concerned our 

body, it would not make so much difference; for 

we will have to lay that down in a little while 

1 Matt. 7 : 21-23. ^ 2 Cor. 13 : 5. 

50 



THE BACKSLIDEll. 11 

anyhow; but a mistake here costs us our soul for 
eternity, 

'' There are two roads, in particular, that look 
very much like the right one ; and a great many 
travel along them, feeling comfortable because 
they do not take the trouble to look closely 
enough at the ^ guide-book^ to see the difference. 

'' One is the Morality road. Those who travel 
this road have quit swearing, or drinking, or 
some bad habits they may have had, and joined 
church, and walk along very w^ell satisfied with 
themselves, thinking they are good enough for 
heaven, and will be sure to get there, forgetting 
that Christ says, ^/am the way: no man cometh 
to the Father but by me/ ^ Morality follows 
religion. The true Christian will be a moral 
man ; ^ but morality alone cannot save us : ^ Christ 
only can do that. 

'' Then there is the Feelings road. At some 
period of our lives — perhaps at some time of a 
revival in the church — we get very much afraid 
of death and hell. Perhaps we have heard 

1 John 14 : 6. 2 2 Tim. 2 : 19. 

3 Kom. 3 : 20. Gal. 2 : 16. Acts 13 : 39. 

5* 51 



12 THE BACKSLIDER. 

some preacher talk a great deal about these 
things, and we become very much excited ; we 
can scarcely sleep or eat, and our thoughts are 
all about death and the judgment. Our feelings 
are worked up until we are almost crazy. But 
this is not sorrow for sin against a pure and holy 
God, — only /ear of its punishment. This is mere 
mental excitement, and cannot last. There must 
be a reaction. That is a fixed law of nature. 
When you are very much frightened, how strong 
you are ! but how weak you are after it is over ! 
If this ward was on fire, I suppose this sick 
brother could find strength enough to get up 
and walk out of the door there, from the flames; 
but, after he was safe in the street, how weak he 
would feel ! This would be from physical re- 
action, — the calm after the storm. So, when 
mental reaction comes after so-called religious 
excitement, because we feel calmer, we rest on 
our feelings and think we are Christians, when 
in reality the peace that comes from saving faith 
in Christ has nothing to do with it. We should 
feel happy because we are safe, — not safe because 
we feel happy, I have known some whose lives 

52 



THE BACKSLIDER. 13 

afterwards proved that they were really converted 
to God at the time of great religious excitement; 
but if you watch closely, you will find that too 
many of those who make a profession then, go 
back again as bad as ever/^ 

'' That's so/' said ^^No. 9/' earnestly. '' I've 
seen that myself." 

'^ You w^ill find that some of them hold out 
long enough to join church, and pray, and talk 
in public, and for a while seem to be really 
Christians. The word in their hearts is the 
^ good seed, that fell on stony places, and sprang 
up quickly;' but when the hot sun of tempta- 
tion or persecution arose, it Svithered away, 
because it had no root.' ^ 

" The army is an excellent ' detector^ for such 
men. When they are surrounded by the temp- 
tations of the camp, and arc cut off from home- 
influences, they very soon show what colours they 
are really marching under. They leave off 
praying and reading their Bible, because they 
fear the laugh and sneer of man more than 
they fear or love God; and in a little time, 

1 Matt. 13 : 20-22. 

53 



'^. 



14 THE BACKSLIDER. 

perhaps, you will see them playing cards, and 
hear them swearing and talking just as badly 
as any one around them. You would never 
suspect from their actions that they had ever 
professed the Saviour's name. And yet, perhaps, 
if you should ask them in confidence, they 
would tell you that they were Christians, and 
try to excuse their conduct with, ' It is so hard 
to live right in the army.' 

'' But, if you ask further, you will find too often 
that the only reason they can give for their hope 
is, not because Christ died for them and that they 
have given themselves to and trust in Him, but 
because they felt badly on the subject of religion 
once, and then felt better after it.'^ 

" But don't you think," said one near us, who 
had been quietly listening, '' that true Christians 
can backslide f^ 

^^Yes, I do think it. God Himself says, 
^Return, ye backsliding children, and I will 
heal your backslidings.' ^ ' Return unto me, and 
I will return unto you, saith the Lord of hosts ;'^ 
and He would not have said that if it were not 

1 Jer. 3 : 22. ^ Mai. 3 : 7. 

54 



j^- 



THE BACKSLIDER. 15 

possible both for them to go away and to re- 
turn again. But ^you have perhaps seen a 
lamb fall into the mire; but you never saw it 
wallow in it, as if it loved it, as the swine do.^ 
I could imagine a true Christian who had been 
in the habit of swearing before he was converted, 
if he should be very much provoked, suddenly, 
when he was not on his guard, — I could even 
imagine an oath coming from his lips at such a 
moment; but how quickly he would repent and 
cry for pardon! Peter, you remember, swore, 
and denied his Master too; but how quickly ^he 
w^ent out and wept bitterly^ ! ^ David fell very 
far too ; but as soon as he was convinced of his 
sin, he repented and turned to God.^ But, my 
friend, I should very strongly suspect that a man 
w^ho could go on for weeks, months, or perhaps 
years, day after day, taking the Saviour^s name 
profanely on his lips, or doing any thing that 
He has expressly forbidden, had never really felt 
that dear Saviour's love in his heart. I should 
be afraid to trust my soul for eternity on such 
an experience as that. I should be very much 

1 Matt. 26 : 69-75. ^ 2 Sam. 12 : 13. 

55 



16 THE BACKSLIDER. 

afraid that a hope that was not strong enough to 

carry me through the army would not be strong 

enough to carry me over the dark waters of death. 

I think the safest plan in that case would be 

to throiv away that old hope altogether, and go 

to Christ at once, as a lost and helpless sinner, 

pleading for mercy, just as if I had never tried 

to do so before. The wisest plan would be, like 

the prodigal son/ to arise and go to his father 

now, ' and say unto him, Father, I have sinned 

against heaven and before Thee, and am no more 

worthy to be called thy son; make me as one 

of thy hired servants.^ You see, he did not 

claim any of the rights or privileges of a son. 

He felt that he had forfeited them by his sinful 

wanderings; and he was content to take the 

lowest place, — a place among the servants who 

waited on his father and brother, — if only he 

could find shelter in that father^s home once 

more. And don't you remember how gladly he 

was received ? How, when he was yet 'a great 

way off,' that kind father saw him, and ran out 

to meet him, and fell upon his neck, and kissed 

1 Luke 15 : 11-32. 
56 



THE BACKSLIDER. 17 

him, and led him into the house, and dressed 
him in the best robe, and killed the fatted calf 
to feast him with, and what rejoicing there was 
all over the house? So is there ^ joy in heaven' 
over the repenting sinner. So does our hea- 
venly Father come out to meet us and receive 
us in love when we return to Him. So does He 
take off our sin-stained rags, and clothe us in the 
' robe of Christ's righteousness,' and make us to 
sit down at the feast of love He has prepared for 
us. Hoio can we turn away from this great love, 
and feed on the husks of the world, when there 
is food enough and to spare, and peace and rest, 
in our Father's house? ^Turn ye, turn ye; for 
why will ye die ?' ^ ^ To-day if you will hear 
his voice, harden not your heart,' ^ but turn to 
him and live." 

Before I left, ^^No. 9" promised me that, 
Christ helping him, he would try to get back 
again to his Father's house that night, before he 
slept. 

" Where is No. 9 ?" I asked his comrade the 

next time I visited the ward. I saw his bed 

1 Ezek. 33 : 11. 2 Heb. 4 : 7. 

57 



18 THE BACKSLIDER. 

was empty. ^^Hc is dead/^ was the answer. 
And in the judgment I do not know on which 
hand to look for him. His comrade could tell 
me nothing more than that he became suddenly- 
worse a few days after I saw him^ and died, — 
apparently peacefully. 

Backsliding soldier of the Cross, wherever you 
may be to-<lay, that kind ^' Captain of your 
salvation/^ whose ^^ colours'^ you have let trail in 
the dust, and so brought disgrace on His name 
in the presence of His enemies, speaks to you : 

" / know thy worhsy that thou hast a name 
that thou livest, and art dead. Remember 
therefore how thou hast received, and hold fast, 
and repent. If therefore thou shalt not watch, 
I will come on thee as a thief, and thou shalt 
not know what hour I will come upon thee. 

'^ He that overcometh, the same shall be 
clothed in white raiment, and I will not blot 
his name out of the book of life, but I will con- 
fess his name before my Father, and before His 
angels.^^ ^ 

1 Kev. 3:1,3, 5. 
58 



THE 



CARELESS SINNEK; 



OE, 



-^ ^ehiov fa <S)cb. 



THE CARELESS SINNER ; 

OR, 

A DEBTOR TO GOD. 



As I went into Ward 9, one day, I found 
one of the-three crazy men in that ward, sitting 
on a bench near the door, and stopped with him 
for a few moments. 

He had lost both parents and home since he 
came into the army, and had brooded over the 
loss — poor boy ! — until he became deranged, his 
madness taking the form of a deep melancholy. 

The first time I saw him, he was sitting be- 
hind a pillar, so near the stove that the perspi- 
ration was rolling in great drops from his face, 
while he was apparently unconscious of the heat, 
or of any thing that w^as going on around him; 
and there was such a hopeless, aimless look on 

3 61 



4 THE CARELESS SINNER; OR, 

his young face tliat it arrested me, as I was 
passing to one of my sick men. 

But neither then, nor for several times after- 
wards, could I elicit much more than monosyl- 
lables, between deep sighs. 

That day I had brought him some little pre- 
sents, to try to arouse him and interest him, — 
among them, the ^^Illustrated Tract Primer.^^ 
He could not read ; and I tried to have him 
learn ^^A,^^ and find all the A's on the pages, 
as I turned the leaves. Sometimes he would 
point out one for me; but oftener he would 
answer, between long-drawn sighs, ^^Oh, it is 
no use.^^ 

'^ Oh, it is no use for me to learn to read," he 
said, at last. ^^ I don't see any use for me to live. 
I have no father, and no mother, and no home. 
You had better give that to some one else," he 
said, handing me back a nice little ^^ housewife" 
I had given him. ^^ It a'n't no use for me to 
have it." And then he took up, and kept re- 
peating, the sad refrain, '^ I have no father, and 
no mother, and no home," until my heart 
ached. 

62 



A DEBTOR TO GOD. 5 

Several convalescents had gathered to tiiat 
end of the ward, and were watching us witli a 
good deal of interest. 

"I always feel that I ought to be very good, 
and love God a great deal, when I look on such 
a sight as this/^ I said, turning to a new-comer 
who w^as seated on a cot near us. 

'' Yes : it is a sad sight, that^s a fact.^^ 

^^ I always feel more strongly, at such a time, 
that my mind is God^s gift,^ and that I ought to 
use it in His service as long as He lets me keep 
it. D^n't you think I ought?' ' 

^^Yes, I suppose so. I have seen quite a 
number of soldiers go crazy since I came into 
the army,'' he added, quickly, trying to change 
the subject. ^^ Sickness and trouble, I suppose, 
caused it." 

" Why w^ere not you one of those crazy men, 
friend? What better use than they had you 
been making of your reason, that God should 
let you bring it home untouched? Had you 
been spending it in His service ?' ' 

^^J^o : I am afraid not." 

1 2 Tim. 1 : 7. 

6* 63 



6 THE CARELESS SINNER; OR, 

" Have you been using it to think of Ilim 
and study your duty to Him, and to learn His 
will in such a Avay as to do it? How much 
has God been in your mind, and your mind 
been in subjection to His will V^ 

" Not very much, I am afraid/^ 

'^ I do not know any thing about you, friend. 
I hope you would not do such a thing, but you 
have at least known men w^ho did, — take that 
reason which God gave them and preserved to 
them, and try to convince themselves and others 
that there was no God, that the Bible wa^only a 
fable, and that its teachings were all a delusion/^ 

^^Oh, no: I am not that bad! I believe 
that the Bible is true/^ 

" Only you do not believe that its teachings 
concern you f^ 

^' Oh, yes : I know they do/^ 

'' Have you acted as if they did ? Have 

you recognized God^s right to control your 

thoughts, and consulted His wishes, even in 

worldly matters, as to how you should use the 

powers of mind He has given you ?^ Have you 

1 Prov. 3 : 5, 6. Psalm 37 : 5. Prov. 16 : 3. 
64 



A DEBTOR TO GOD. 7 

been using them even in the least to work His 

will?'' 

"I am afraid not/' 

^^And your hands^ — I see God has let you 
bring both of them back, while there is more 
than one armless sleeve even in this ward. 
Every muscle of them is His gift to you, to be 
used only under the control of Plis laws.^ Has 
God preserved them to you because you used 
them as He wished? or have you used them as 
you pleased, without any reference to His will 
in the matter ? Have you never raised them in 
anger, or to break His laws or the laws of your 
country, or used them to wrong your fellow- 
men ? What have you been doing with your 
hands, friend, that God should let you keep 
them both ? 

" And your feet/' — I continued, seeing he did 
not answer: ^^you have them both still, I see, 
while yonder is one of your companions who 
has only one left," glancing down the ward to 
where B. was hobbling around upon his crutches ; 

1 Ex. 20 : 4-6. Ex. 20 : 8-13, 15. 1 JoKn 3 : 15. ♦Isa. 
66 : 2. Hab. 2 : 15. 

65 



8 THE CARELESS SINNER; OR, 

"and near him sits one who has lost the use of 
both. Have you been using your feet to walk lu 
the way of God's commandments?^ Have they 
carried you to His house whenever you could 
go?^ Have they never helped you to break 
His holy day?^ Have they never carried you 
where you knew that He did not allow you to 
go^ or into a place which you knew He had 
forbidden you to visit ?^ Has the fear of His 
displeasure ever restrained a step, or a sincere 
desire to please Him controlled one of their 
motions ? 

"And your eyes: — many of the soldiers come 
back without the use of one, or both. Have 
you never looked upon what you kne,w God 
had forbidden?^ Have you never read what 
you knew, even while you read it, that He dis- 
approved of your reading ? ^ Have you used your 
eyes, as often as you should, to read ih^ Bible — 
God's own message to your soul — and learn what 
He wished you to do and what He told you 

1 Luke 1:6. ^ n^b^ iq : 25. ^ ig^. 53 : 13. 

^'Prov. 4 : 14. Prov. 1 : 10-15. Prov. 7. 

5 Prov. 23 : 29-33. ^ 1 q^^^ 15 . 33, 

06 



A DEBTOR TO GOD. 9 

not to do ?^ Have you never, by a look, helped 
others to sin, or used your eyes as servants to 
open the door and carry sin into your heart ?^ 
Have you received them as God^s gifts to you, 
subject to His laws, and used them according 
to His directions always, that He should have 
taken such care of them for you ? You did not 
preserve them: for if you could, so could others, 
and if they could, they would have done so. 

"And your hearing/^ — I could see that he 
heard me distinctly, although he still did not 
answer ; " have your ears always been closed 
to sinful sounds, or listened unwillingly when 
you could not escape from them? Have you 
never sat contentedly and listened to conversa- 
tion w^hich you knew a pure and holy God dis- 
approved of? Have you never closed them to 
the voice of instruction or warning?^ Have 
you always, when it was in your power, placed 
them where His vrord might have access through 
them to your heart, — used them to learn His 
will in such a way as to do it? 

1 Jolin 5 : 39. ^ Matt. 5 : 28. Ex. 20 : 17. 

3 2 Tim. 4 : 4. Matt. 13 : 15. 

67 



10 THE CAEELESS SINNER; OR, 

" I remember a number of soldiers whom I 
have met in the hospitals, who had lost the use 
of their voice, or could only speak in a painful 
whisper. You have met persons, perhaps, who 
were altogether dumb. 

" God gave you the gift of speech, and has 
preserved it to you. He has given you laws by 
which it was to be governed.^ Have you been 
using it to keep them, or to break them ? 

" I hope you Avould not do such a thing, 
friend, but you have at least heard men take 
the voice that God gave them, and the breath 
that they received fresh from His hand every 
moment, and which they could not have for one 
moment unless He did give it,^ — you have heard 
them take that very breath and call Him hard 
names with it, and say all manner of hard things 
against Him, and make sport of Him, and of 
His people, and of His word, and even use it 
to say that there was no God. 

" Isn^t it dreadful to think that any one could 

1 Eph. 4 : 25-29, 31. Matt. 5 : 33-38. Ex. 20 : 7-16. 
Psalm 107 : 32. Eph. 5 : 19. 1 Tim. 2 : 8. Luke 11 : 1-14. 
^ Gen. 2 : 7. Job 12 : 10. 
68 



A DEBTOR TO GOD. 11 

do such a thing as that ! Try to strike God^ as 
it were^ with His own gift ! Isn^t it a wonder 
that He did not take that voice from them in 
the very act^ — stop giving them the breath they 
made such use of ?^^ 

" Yes^ it does seem hard, that's a fact, when 
you come to think about it/' he said, slowly, at 
length. '' To tell you the candid truth, I have 
been a very wicked man all my life. I have 
always had good health until here lately, and I 
never stopped to think about these things, much; 
but, still, I always did believe that there was a 
God, and that the Bible was true, and I always 
meant to be a Christian some day.'' 

"And, in the mean time, you just took God's 
gifts and used them as you pleased." 

" Yes : I suppose so." 

" That was not right, friend, oh, indeed it was 
not right, to treat God that way. How could 
you do it? Wasn't it a wonder that He did not 
take them from you ? Hasn't He had patience 
with you ! Hasn't He been kind ! Have you 
ever thanked Him for it ?" 

"No." 



12 THE CARELESS SINNER; OR, 

^' You have prayed to God sometimes in your 
life, surely?'^ 

^^No; if I must own it, I never have/^ 

^* Not in all these years? More than twenty 
of them; twenty-five, perhaps; but we will say 
twenty, at least. 

'' V/ill you take this pencil, friend, and on 
the fly-leaf of this little book compute the 
number of minutes in those years, — and we 
will say ten breaths, at least, to the minute, — 
and see how many breaths you have drawn 
direct from God's hand, and never thanked Him 
for one of them, or used one in His service f^ 

He took the pencil from my hand, and worked 
out the sum,— 105,192,000. 

^^ And with every one of those breaths God 
gave you the gifts of sight, ii earing, speech, 
motion and mind (except v/hen you were asleep ; 
and then He preserved them for you). 

" What a debt vou owe Him ! And that is 
not the worst of it. You have not only not 
been using His gifts in His service, but you have 
been using them in the service of tlie enemy, — 
making use of them only to fight against God.'' 

70 



A DEBTOR TO GOD. 13 



(( 



Oh, no. I am not so bad as that. I have 
never done much for God, I know; but, still, I 
don't think that I have been fighting against 
Him.'^ 

*^ God Himself says, ^ He that is not Vv^th me 
is against me; and he that gathereth not with 
me, scattereth abroad.^ ^ 

" Now, whose word am I to believe, — His, or 
yours ?'^ 

^^ Why, His, of course/^ 

" Let us think a little, and see what that means. 

^^ Sometimes — more than once in your life — 



God has sent his Holy Spirit down to you, and 
made you feel that you were not doing right, and 
that you ought to do better, and troubled you 
with thoughts of death, and of the time when 
you would have to go before your Judge and 
give an account of yourself, and made you to 
feel something of what a sinner you were in 
His sight, until you could not help wishing you 
were a Christian. Didn't He ?'' 

" Well, yes. I suppose everybody feels that 
way, sometimes.'' 

iMatt. 12: 30. 

7 n 



14 THE CAllELESS SINNER; OH, 

^^ Now^ that was God\s Spirit, God Himself, 
knocking at the door of your heart, saying, ' Open 
unto me;' and, instead of doing so, you picked 
up a newspaper or a novel, and used your eyes 
to read it, and so drove Him from your thoughts ; 
or let your feet carry you into some place of 
amusement, or among your sinful companions, 
and listened to their conversation and joined in 
it; or used your hands in some work or amuse- 
ment that would occupy your thoughts. In one 
way or another, yoit fought against God until 
you had succeeded in driving Him from your 
mind. Isn't that true?'' 

^^ I must say that it is. I can't deny it." 
" And that is not all. ^ God so loved the world' 
as to give His only Son to come down to this 
world, and suffer and die, that such sinners as 
you and I could ■ be saved ; and you knew it ; 
and all these long years, ever since you were old 
enough to understand, Christ has been calling 
to you, ' Look unto me, and be saved ;' ^ Turn 
ye, turn ye; for why will ye die?' and you heard 
Him, and just kept on in your own way as if 
He had not spoken. You have not treated Him 

72 



A DEBTOR TO GOD. 15 

with respect, even. You have taken His holy 
name to swear by.'^ (I had noticed him wince 
when I spoke of calling God hard names.) 
"That dear Jesus, — dear Saviour! How could 
you do it? 

" He died to buy a pardon for you, and has 
been pleading with you, by His word and 
Spirit, for many years, to accept of it ; and you 
would not do it. 

" If there were no God, no heaven, no hell, 
no Saviour, — if all of them should cease to 
exist from this moment, and you knew it, — it 
would make scarcely any change in your course 
to-day. You could scarcely treat them with 
more indifference than you have been doing for 
these tw^enty years or more. That is a strong 
assertion, friend; but think if it is not true. 

" And that is not all. You have not been 
travelling that road alone. You have been 
taking some of those around you along with 
you. Your example and influence have en- 
couraged and helped others to sin, — how much, 
you know^, perhaps, and God knows; and for 
that, too, you must give an account. 

73 



16 THE CARELESS SINNER; OR, 

"God gave you whatever time and talents 
and influence you may have had;^ and you 
have used them in the service of Satan.^ 

" He required you to give Him your heart ;^ 
and you have let the enemy keep possession 
of it.^ 

'' Pie required you to ^ oifer up your body a 
living sacrifice to God, which is your reasonable 
service;'^ and, instead of doing that, you have 
used every faculty of your mind, and every 
power of your body, to hold out against Him, 
to resist His will, to refuse to submit to Him, 
to reject His love, and to rebel against His 
government. That is hard talk, friend; but 
you know that it is true/^ 

" Yes, it is hard, that^s a fact; but it is nothing 
more than the truth, I suppose; although I 
never thought of it that way before." 

" Now, how long are you going to treat God 
that way f 

" Not very long, I hope. I will tell you : I 
have thought more about these things since I 

1 James 1 : 17. ^ ^^^^ 5 . ig^ j^j^n 8 : 34. 

s Prov. 23 : 26. * 1 John 3 : 10. ^ ^^^^ 12 : 1. 
74 



A DEBTOK TO GOD. 17 

have been sick^ than ever I did In my life before ; 
and I have just about made up my mind^ that, 
if I live to get home^ I will turn over a new 
leaf, and try to live a Christian for the rest of 
my days/^ 

" But you ought not to stand in that position 
towards God for another day or another hour/^ 

'' I know ; but, you see, I am looking for my 
discharge every day now ; and I will give you 
my solemn promise that I will not put off at- 
tending to these things any longer." 

" Will you ask God now to help you keep 
that promise ? Will you take the first step in 
the road to heaven, open up the first direct 
communication between your soul and God, to- 
night, — before you sleep, — by earnest prayer to 
Him that He will, for Christ's sake, pardon all 
your sins, and help you, by His Spirit, to give 
yourself up, soul and body, to Jesus, now ?" 

'' Yes : I will promise to do that, God helping 
me," he said, as if he meant it. 

That was the last time I saw him. When I 
Vv^ent back the next week, his cot was empty. 
He had received his discharge and gone home. 

7- 75 



18 THE CARELESS SINNER. 

Reader, what are God's gifts to you ? And 
what use have you been making of them ? You 
may succeed in driving every thought of your 
debt to God from your mind now; but, none 
the less surely for your not thinking of it, 
" Know thou that for all these things God will 
bring thee into judgment/' ^ 

1 Eccl. 11 : 9. 



76 



THE MORALIST. 



THE MORALIST, 



I LOYED to go into the wards in the winter 
twilight. It was the pleasantest hour of the 
day. The convalescents, who on sunny days 
crept out into the sunshine on the piazzas, or, 
with their crutches or canes, strolled around the 
parade-ground or visited their comrades in other 
wards, were at that hour gathered in little groups 
around the bright wood fires or the stoves, talk- 
ing quietly, or reading, or their thoughts going 
out to another fireside far away, and their hearts 
melting with the memories of home, or were 
lying, resting and thinking, on their cots. 

Supper was over, too, and the duties of the 
day; and the soldiers on duty as nurses had 
time to mingle with their charges for a little 
while, unless the ward was very fall of sick. 

3 79 



4 THE MOHALIST. 

One evening, when at the B Hospital, 

I went back into Ward 9, to spend an hour 
with the sick men, w^hile some friends were 
holding a meeting in the chapel with the 
convalescents, and soldiers from the barracks 
near us. 

I had gone down one side of the ward that 
day, talking to each one ; and upon the first cot 
at the lower end of the ward, when I went back 
in the evening, I found a young German, who 
had been absent during the day. 

He was not a Christian, he told me ; and, 
while I was talking with him and a middle- 
aged, happy "pilgrim^^ on the next cot (in a 
hopeless decline), who had reached the land of 
" Beulah'^ and was waiting and watching for 
the ^^ messenger w^ith his token'^ to come for 
him and take him home, a nurse, whom I had 
seen in the ward for the first time that dav but 
did not have any opportunity to talk to, came 
and sat down beside us. 

He was a paroled prisoner from the barracks, 
he told me, — had looked upon death in almost 
every form, had passed through many a scene 

80 



THE MORALIST. 5 

of danger and suffering, but bad come out in 
safety tbrougb tbeni all. 

'' God must bave loved you a great deal, friend, 
to bave taken sucli care of you/^ I said, wben 
be bad finisbed. " Did He do it because you 
loved Him r 

" Ob, yes : of course I feel grateful to God 
for bringing me tbrougb so many, dangers/^ 

" Are you a Cbristian, friend ?" 

^' Xo : I can^t exactly say tbat I am a Cbris- 
tian. Still, I don^t tbink tbat I am a very bad 
man. I never swear, nor drink, nor play cards, 
nor do any tbing very wicked. I always at- 
tended cburcb regularly wben I was at bome. I 
couldn^t get to do tbat, very mucb, since I came 
into tbe army, you know; but still I read my 
BiBle, and try to deal justly and bonestly witb 
every man, and do as near rigbt as I can.^^ 
And tbere was a great deal of self-complacency 
in bis tone as be told me tbis. 

^^But you don^t do rigbt always, do you? 
You bave done wrong acts, and said wrong 
words, sometimes in your life, baven^t you V^ 

^^Yes,^' be said, slowly, "I suppose so: I 

81 



6 THE MORALIST. 

suppose no one can altogether keep from doing 
wrong all the time.'^ 

^^No. ' If we say we have not sinned/ what 
does the Bible say about us, brother f^ I asked 
the Christian soldier. 

"It says, Sve make God a liar, and His word 
is not in us.' '^ ^ 

" Suppose/' I said to the nurse, " that all the 
thoughts that have passed through your mind 
to-day were printed in large letters, all around 
the walls of this ward, so that every one of the 
men could read them. Would you care?'' 

He winced a little. " I think I would rather 
not." 

" They are all written down in God's book, 
friend, — every one of them ; and your comrades 
will read them, too, some day. 

" Suppose that, as you walked around through 
the day, or lay on your bed at night, you had 
to speak out every thought that came into 
your mind, so loudly that every one in the 
room could hear you : would you be willing to 
doit?" 

1 1 John 1 : 10. 

82 



THE MORALIST. 7 

"No: I would not.'^ 

"^If our heart condemn us, God is greater 
than our heart, and knoweth all things/ ^ 

"God heard you think, friend. Every 
thought of your heart was spoken to His ear ; 
and your fellow-men will hear every one of 
them, too, when the account-books are opened. 

" Will you do this ? — for one day only, note 
dowm the thoughts which pass through your 
mind that you would not be willing to let your 
comrades hear, and then multiply their sum 
by the number of days in your life; and it will 
give you a little idea of how the ' account' of 
your thoughts stands on the. book above.'' 

" But,'' asked the young German, " don't you 
think that if a man becomes a Christian, all 
these things will be blotted out? Don't it say 
so some place in the Bible?" 

" ^Sins are sometimes compared, in the Bible, 
to debts,^ which are written in the creditor's 
book, and crossed or blotted out when they 
are paid. Our sins are all written down in 
God's book of remembrance, or accounts, out 

1 1 John 3 : 20. ^ Matt. 6 : 12. 

8 83 



8 THE MORALIST. 

of which all shall be judged on the last day;^ 
and when our sins are pardoned they are said 
to be blotted out/ and not found any more, 
though they should be sought for/ ^ That is, 
w^hen a man becomes a Christian, Jesus takes 
that man^s debts, or sins, upon Himself, — credits 
them to His own account; and He has already 
paid the debt of all of His redeemed ones ; but 
that account is still on the book, although it 
does not stand against the ransomed sinner any 
more; because the Bible ^ says that ^God shall 
bring every work into judgment, with every secret 
thing y whether it be good ^ or whether it be evil/ 
and this is needful, ' that every mouth may be 
stopped, and all the world may become guilty 
before God,^^ and His justice be shown clearly, 
for this reason : 

"There are hypocrites in the world, who 
wear a fair character to the eyes of their fellow- 
men, and carry that character with them to the 
grave, it may be; and yet God^s book shows a 

1 Rev. 20 : 12. 2 ig^. 44 : 22. 

3 Jer. 50 : 20. * Eccl. 12 : 14. 

5 1 Cor. 4 : 1-6. ^ Ro^i. 3 : 19. 

84 



THE MORxVLIST. 9 

long list of secret sins, known to few, perhaps, 
besides God and their own souls. 

^^ Suppose that you should see such a man, 
whom you had thought to be a good man, 
standing at the left hand that day, along with 
those you knew to be openly wicked : wouldn't 
you feel like asking why, and think it was not 
just? And so the account-books will be read, 
to show you why. 

" Then, too, a man may sin in his heart every 
day and hour of his life, and yet no one know 
it but God and himself. God's ^commandment 
is exceeding broad,' ^ reaching even to Hhe 
thoughts and intents of the heart ;' ^ and He 
says that it is as much a sin for a man to think 
over, or desire to do, a bad action in his heart, 
as it is to do it." ^ 

^^ Why, how can that be?" asked the nurse. 
^^ How can a man stand the same in God's sight 
after he has committed a bad act, as when he 
only thought of doing it?" 

1 Psalm 119 : 96. 

2 Heb. 4 : 12. Kom. 2 : 16. 

3 Matt. 5 : 28. 

85 



10 THE MORALIST. 

"God says, ^Tliou slialt not kill/^ and, 
^ Whoso hateth his brother is a murderer/^ 

" In GocTs sight, the sin of murder is in the 
heart of a man who hates his brother, whether 
he kills that brother or not. If he kills him, 
he adds the sinful act to the sinful thought; he 
adds another sin to the first. 

"Now, as long as he keeps that sin within 
the bounds of his own heart, it affects no one 
but himself. If he adds the sinful act to the 
sinful thought, it aflFects his neighbour too. 

" Even human laws extend to that sin of the 
heart, as far as they can. A man may kill his 
neighbour, and, if he can prove it to have been 
done accidentally, or without design, the law 
only inflicts a comparatively slight punishment. 
But if it can be proved that he conceived and 
planned the act beforehand, Svith malice afore- 
thought,^ the penalty is death. 

" Now, human laws extend only to our words 
and acts, or to so much of our thoughts as comes 
to the surface in our words and acts; because 
they have no power to go beyond that. 

1 Ex. 20 : 13. 2 1 joiii^ 3 . 15, Matt. 5 : 21, 22. 

86 



THE MORALIST. 11 

^^ They have no power to know what a man 
thinks^ and no right to punish him for those 
thoughts as long as he keeps them inside of his 
own heart; but our hearts are as open to the 
eye of God as our words and actions to the eyes 
of men; and His law extends over even the 
faintest impulse or desire of the heart, or the 
most secret thought hidden away in our minds, 
just as much as to our words and actions. Is 
that truef ' 

" I don^t know. I suppose it is. That is 
cutting pretty close, though.^' 

^^The Bible cuts dose^ friend. ^The word of 
God is quick and powerful, and sharper than 
any two-edged sword, piercing even to the 
dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the 
joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the 
thoughts and intents of the heart. Neither is 
there any creature that is not manifest in His 
sight; but all things are naked, and opened unto 
the eyes of Him with whom we have to do.^^ 

" It cuts closer yet, friend. God is our Law- 
giver and our Judge ;^ and He says that ^The 

I Heb. 4 : 12, 13. 2 ig^. 33 : 22. James 4 : 12. 
8- 87 



12 THE MORALIST. 

thought of foolishness is sin,^^ and ^All unright- 
eousness is sin/ ^ and ^ Whatever is not of faith is 
sin.' ^ 

^^And not only in a few passages^ but the whole 
tenor of the teachings of the Bible goes to show 
that in His sight we are lost in sin/ dead in 
sin ; ^ and it cuts away every particle of goodness 
from the natural heart/ and shows us that while 
that heart remains as it is by nature we cannot 
by one act of our lives please God/ and that, 
in His sight, every imagination of the thoughts 
of the natural heart is ^only evil/ and that 
'continually/^ 

'^It cuts so close that even the best man 
that ever lived, when he searches his heart 
by the light of the law and Spirit, must stand 
guilty and ashamed before God,^ without one 
particle of his own goodness to offer Him,^^ and 
is forced to hide behind the righteousness of 
Christ.i^ 

1 Prov. 24 : 9. ^1 John 5 : 17. ^ j^om. 14 : 23. 

* Matt. 18 : 11. ^ Eph. 2:1. ^ pgaim 14 : 1-4. 

^ Heb. 11 : 6. Kom. 8 : 8. ^Gen. 6 : 5; 8 : 21. 

9 Eccl. 7 : 20. lo Matt. 19 : 17. Isa. 64 : 6. 

11 Phil. 3 : 9. 



THE MOEALIST. 13 

" Now, we don^t lihe to believe such a thing 
as that. We naturally like to think well of 
ourselves; and, if our outward life comes up to 
our own standard of right, we shut our eyes to 
that sin of the heart, or count it a very little 
thing, and think ourselves good. 

" But either the Bible means what it says, or 
it means nothing. Either it is the rule by which 
we are to measure ourselves, or we have none; 
and, if we look closely at it, we see that sins of 
the heart and mind, whether they come to the 
surface or not, are placed in the very same con- 
demnation with sins of word and act. 

'' Take one example only : you will find it in 
the first chapter of Romans, where it speaks of 
men by nature as 

"^ Being filled with all unrighteousness, for- 
nication, wickedness, covetousness, malicious- 
ness; full of envy, murder, debate, deceit, ma- 
lignity; whisperers, 

'^ ' Backbiters, haters of God, despiteful, proud, 
boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to 
parents, 

" ' Without understanding, covenant-breakers, 

89 



14 THE MOKALIST. 

without natural affection, implacable, unmer- 
ciful.' 

" Now, at least one-half of the list are sins 
of the heart, which may be kept in the heart, 
hidden from the eyes of men, but whicli, gene- 
rally, do produce a plentiful harvest of sinful 
words and acts.^ 

"God says,^ ^My son, give me thine heart^ 
^ Out of it are 'the issues of life/^ If you give 
that to God, He will have every thing which 
proceeds from it.^ 

"Sin means ^a transgression of the law/^ 
Let us see what are some of God's laws for the 
heart. 

"^Thou shalt love the Lord thy God witli 
all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and will] 
all thy mind.'^ Do you love God, friend?'' 

" I think I do, — some." 

" Do you love your wife and little ones ?" 
(He had just heard from them, the first time for 
months.) 

1 Mark 7 : 21-24. ^ p^ov. 23 : 26. ^ p^o^, 4 . 23. 
* Luke 6 : 43^6. & 1 John 3 : 4. Kom. 4 : 4. 
6 Matt. 22 : 37. 
90 



THE MORALIST. 15 

^^Yes, Indeed I do/' he said^ emphatically; 
and the ligi:ht and warmth came into his face at 
the thought of them. 

" Did you think of them often in these past 
months ?" 

^^Yes, indeed I did^ — every day and hour of 
my life^ almost/' 

" You can have some idea of how much you 
love God, by comparing the feeling you have for 
Him with the feeling you have for the dear 
ones at home. 

"You can tell somethings too, by comparing 
the feeling you had when you read your wife's 
letter to-day, with the feeling you had when 
you read God^s letters to you, in the Bible, after 
being without a Bible for so long. 

" Do you pray to God every day, friend ?" 

" Not every day. I do sometimes, though." 

" Would your wife think you had much love 
for her^ if you would be in her presence all the 
time and yet let days pass without speaking to 
her? 

"Or coidd you feel much love for her and 
yet only speak to her ' somethnes' f 

91 



16 THE MORALIST. 

" Now, God says you must love your wife as 
you do your own life.^ She and your little ones 
should be dearer to you than any thing else on 
earth ; but God requires you to love Him better 
than any thing else in the world. ' Thou shalt 
have no other gods before me/ ^ He says. 

^^Now, you say that you have kept the 
second great commandment, ' Thou shalt love 
thy neighbour as thyself/^ but ask your own 
heart if you have kept the first and greatest ^ as 
God requires you to keep it. 

" ' God is a Spirit; and they that worship Him 
must worship Him in spirit and in truth.^ ^ 

^^You say that you attended church regu- 
larly when you were at home; and so, as far as 
the outer man was concerned, you obeyed the 
order ^not to forsake the assembling of your- 
selves together'^ for worship; but let us ask 
our own hearts (yours and mine by nature, 
friend) what they have been engaged in doing, 
too often, even in the house of God. 

^^ Thinking of ourselves, of our friends, of 

1 Eph. 5 : 33. '' Ex. 20 : 3. ^ Matt. 22 : 37-40. 
* John 4 : 24. & Heb. 10 : 25. 
92 



THE MORALIST. 17 

our worldly affairs, of our plans for the future, 
of the persons sitting there with us, of mattei's 
in the world around us. Ood was very little in 
our thoughts. 

"And even when we were standing or kneel- 
ing in prayer, either there or at home, how 
often have we drawn near to God with our lips, 
while our hearts were far from Him ! ^ 

"Speaking the words, sometimes, almost 
without knowing what we were saying; and 
yet, as we came out of church, sometimes, and 
saw men who had not been there, idling in the 
streets, or seeking their own amusement, we 
have had a feeling as if we were at least some 
degrees nearer to God than they, although we 
had not, in reality, been loorshipping God any 
more than they had been. 

"When we have seen others do wrong, we 
have stood up, in our hearts, and said, — 

" ' O God, I thank thee that I am not as 
other men, or even as this publican.^ ^ And so 
we might appear to the eyes of men; but in 



1 Matt. 15 : 8. 2 L^^e 18 : 10-15. 

93 



18 THE MORALIST. 

the eye of God we stood in the very same con- 
demnation with them, — sinners. 

" You say that you are a moral man, friend ; 
and morality always waits upon religion ; but 
it can never be received as a substitute for it. 

"You nefver knew an immoral Christian; 
although you may have seen professors who 
were not moral. 

"We owe all the morality there is in the 
world to the Bible; but the only morality we 
can oifer to God that will lolease Him must 
spring from the right motive, 

"Of course, I do not know any thing about 
your heart or your past life, friend, except what 
you have told me yourself; and I am only 
judging you by what I know of the natural 
heart, and what I have read about it in the 
Bible. 

"It says there ^ that Hhe heart is deceitful 
above all things, and desperately wicked. Who 
can know it?^ 

"Now, we need to look at our hearts as they 
really are, — as they will stand in God's sight 

1 Jer. 17 : 9. 
94 



THE MORALIST. 19 

111 the judgment. It is not wise to try to de- 
ceive our own souls in a matter which involves 
an eternity. You should pray to God, earnestly, 
to give you His Spirit, to show you your heart 
as He sees it ; — show you how much of your 
morality was prompted by a pure desire to 
please Him, and how much by a desire to 
appear w^ell in the eyes of your fellow-men; 
how many times you were kept from doing 
wrong, not so much from the fear of offending 
God by doing what He had forbidden (if you 
thought of that at all), as by the fear of losing 
the good oj)inion of those around you, or the 
fear of bringing disgrace and trouble upon those 
you loved. 

" God says,^ ' If ye love me, keep my com- 
mandments.^ 

'' That is the reason why we should trj^ to 
do rio:ht, — because God tells us to do so and 
we love to obey Him.^ "Why should we try to 
keep from doing what God has forbidden? Be- 
cause we love God and fear to disobey Him.^ 
Any other motive is an earthly motive, and can 

1 John 14 : 15. ^ John 14 : 23. ^ 2 Cor. 7 : 1. 

9 95 



20 THE MORALIST. 

never please God. More than that, it displeases 
Iliin, because it shuts out the Saviour.^ 

" \\\vAt are you going to do with those sins 
of word and act (not to say any thing about the 
thoughts and desires), that you know you have 
committed against God already, friend? 

" If you should go in debt to this comrade 
here, you might save enough from your future 
earnings to repay him what you owed him ; 
but you never can earn more goodness than you 
need, and take the surplus to pay your debt to 
God. 

" You can never do more than right at any 
one moment; and you owe full and perfect obe- 
dience to God for every moment of your life; 
and without that perfect holiness ^ no man can 
see the Lord^ in peace.^ 

^^ Your plan has no Saviour in it, friend. 

'^ You are virtually saying to God, ' I am 
good enough to go into heaven as I am.' 

^^ You are saying to Jesus, ^ There was no need 
of your suffering for me. I can w^ork my own 
M^ay into heaven.' 

i Gal. 2 : 21 ; 5 : 4. ^Heb. 12: 14. 

96 



THE MORALIST. 21 

^^You are saying to the Spirit^ ^I do not 
need you to change my heart, and to help me to 
do right, and to keep me from doing wrong. 
My heart is good enough as it is, and I am 
able of myself to do all that is needful.' 

'' Your plan is not GocVs plan, friend. You 
could not possibly get into heaven that way, 
God says^ that ^By the deeds of the law there 
shall no flesh be justified in His sight.' 

"A young man came to Jesus, while He was 
upon the earth, asking Y\^hat he should do that 
he might inherit eternal life;^ and he told 
Christ that he had kept all the commandments 
that related to his fellow-men, ^from his youth;' 
but the Saviour told him, ^One thing thou 
lackest.' He had not given his heart to God. 

" Paul was a Pharisee, blameless in the law 
of vforks;^ and yet that would not save him, 
Christ says^ that ^Except your righteousness 
shall exceed the righteousness of the scribes 
and Pharisees, ye shall in no case enter into the 
kingdom of heaven.' 

1 Eora. 3 : 20. Eph. 2:8. ^ Mark 10 : 17-23. 
3 Piiil. 3:6. ^ Matt. 5 : 20. 

97 



22 THE MORALIST. 

" The road you are travelling is not the road 
to heaven at all^ friend, even though you could 
walk in it without stumbling. It does 7iot lead 
there, any more than the path of the openly 
wicked; although to the eyes of the world it 
looks more like the ^strait and narrow path.'^ 

^^The road by which you are trying to find 
heaven was blocked up long ago,^ friend, and a 
new and living way^ opened to us, by which 
only we can enter in and be saved.^^^ 

And then we had a little talk about the way 
of life through a crucified Redeemer; and, be- 
fore I left, both he and the German promised 
that they would seek the Holy Spirit to help 
them to accept God^s plan of salvation, and 
give themselves to Jesus. 

While I was in that same part of the ward, 
the following week, the nurse came up to me 
again. 

He had been thinking and praying a great 
deal, he told me. He had seen himself to be a 

1 Matt. 7 : 14. ^ Qen. 2 : 17. 

3 Heb. 10 : 20. Kom. 5 : 12-20. 

^ John 14 : 6. Acts 4 : 12. 
98 



THE MORALIST. 23 

sinner in God's sight, and had gone to Christ 
for pardon. 

^^And do you think that God has, for Christ's 
sake, pardoned your sins and clothed you in 
Christ's righteousness ?" ^ 

^' I hope He has. I hope I am not trusting 
in any thing else than Jesus now." 

^^And this friend?" (turning to the German 
on his cot, near us. I was just going to speak 
to him as the nurse came up ; and he had heard 
what we said.) 

'' I tried to give myself to Jesus, too, and I 
think He took me." 

" Oh, I am so glad ! — so glad !" 

On my next visit the German had gone 
to his regiment, and I never saw him again ; 
but the nurse was in the ward for a long 
time. 

We had several talks afterwards ; and he told 

me that the more he looked into his ow^n heart 

the more full of sin it seemed to him. God's 

Spirit showed him .more and more, every day, 

how mistaken he was when he thought himself 

1 Eom. 3 : 22. 

9- 99 



24 THE MORALIST. 

good, and how much he needed some otlier 
righteousness than his own before he could 
please God. 

He was exchanged at last, and went home on 
furlough, to see the wife and little ones he 
loved so dearly, — and from there, I suppose, 
went directly to his regiment, as he did not 
return again to the B Hospital. 

A heathen Indian, when he heard for the 
first time of salvation through Christ, offered 
his wampum to buy a pardon for his sins. 

No, the missionary told him, he could not 
have it for that. 

He went away, but returned again, offering 
his gun and the skins he had taken in hunting. 

No: those would not do, either. 

Once more he came back, offering his wig- 
wam, his wife, his children, — all that he had. 

No, the missionary told him, that would' 
not do, still. He could not buy a pardon with 
them. 

Poor Indian ! That was his worldly all, — 
given up with many a secret struggle, perhaps ; 

100 



THE ]\fORALIST. 25 

but his sins troubled him sorely, and he wanted 
j^ardon and peace. 

He stood in silence, busy with his own heart, 
for a little while, and then, looking up, said, 
'' Indian give Jesus Christ himself T^ 

And that was just what the Saviour wanted. 
He asks nothing more, He will take nothing 
less, than our whole selves. 

There is many an Ananias, or a Sapphira,^ in 
the world, who would be willing to give up a 
part to God, if they might keep back a part for 
themselves. 

" I Yiill give God my actions. I will abstain 
from any vice or bad habits, or give up any 
that I may have contracted, and attend church 
regularly, and try to conform in my outward 
life to the rules of the Bible, and deal honestly 
and kindly with my fellow-men. Won^t that 
dor 

And the answer is, ^^My son, give me thy 
heart^^ 

'' I will refrain my lips from speaking evil. 

I will use my lips to pray. I will give my 

1 Acts 5 : 1-11. 

101 



26 THE MORALIST. 

words, and my actions too. Surely that is 
enough. I do not want to give up the thoughts 
and alFections of my heart.^^ 

And the answer is, '' Let the wicked forsake 
his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts.'^ ^ 
^^Thou shalt love the Lord thy God.'^^ a jjim 
only shalt thou serve.'^^ '' Give me thy heart ;^^ 
and if we give that to God, He will have our 
words, and our actions too. 

1 Isa. 55 : 7. ^ Matt. 22 : 37. ^ M^tt. 4 : 10. 



102 



THE 



CAVILLER AT THE CHURCH 



AND 



CHURCH-MEMBERS. 



THE 



CAVILLER AT THE CHURCH AND 
CHURCH-MEMBERS. 



On my visit to the Hospital^ one day^ 

while Miss Oliver^ a young lady who had accom- 
panied me^ was talking to some of the sick 
men in Ward B^ I slipped quietly into C^ a 
small adjoining ward for those who were 
aflBiicted with sore eyes. 

I stood for a moment inside of the door^ and 
glanced around. There w^ere only three patients 
in the room^ I could see by the light which came 
straggling in through the door opening into B. 
(The blinds were all closed^ to exclude the sun- 
shine.) One of them was lying on his cot^ with 
his face turned to the wall^ apparently asleep. 
The other tw^o were sitting close together, near 
the middle of the room, w^ith their heads resting 
on their hands. 

3 105 



4 THE CAVII/r.ER 

As they raised their heads at the sound of my 
step, I saw that they were both new-comers. 
They were well enough, except their eyes, they 
told me ; and those were almost blinded by dis- 
ease caused by hardships and exposure under 
the burning sun of the South. 

'' I think I would rather be deaf, or dumb, 
or lame, or any thing else, than blind,^^ I said, 
when they had finished telling me their stories. 
''J. Vv'ant to see the faces of my friends, and look 
on the world I live in ; and then, when you have 
your eyesight, you can read, or amuse or interest 
yourself, even if you have to remain always in 
one place. But you can do nothing all day but 
sit still, and talk, and think ; and you get tired 
of talking, unless you have a great many very 
interesting subjects to talk about; and then you 
can only think, and suifer.^^ 

^' Yes, it is hard,'^ said the older of the two, 
a middle-aged man, — with threads of gray min- 
gling with his dark hair, as I could see, — on the 
side nearest to the door. ^^It^s harder than to 
be sick, even. I sleep as much of the time 
as I can; but still the days are so long and 

106 



AT THE CHURCH. 



lonesome, it seems as if they never would go 
past/^ 

" You can do a great deal of thinking these 
days, when you have nothing else to do. Can^t 
youf^ 

" Yes : more than I want to, sometimes/^ 

'' A man needs to have pleasant thoughts for 
company at such a time. He needs to have a 
stock of comfort laid up in his heart, when he 
can^t get it from any thing around him. Is 
that your case, friend V^ 

" Not very much comfort, these days, in my 
heart, or any place else.^^ 

" Have you the grace of God in your heart, 
and the love of Christ, and the ' Comforter^ 
that He promised to send to His children ? If 
a man has these, he can be happy anywhere. 
Isn^t that true, friend ?" I said, appealing to 
the younger soldier. 

" Yes, indeed it is so.^^ 

^^Do you know that by your own experience ?^^ 

" Yes : I hope so. If I hadn^t that hope, I 
don^t know what I would do now.^^ 

" And this comrade : is he a Christian too?'^ 

10 107 



6 THE CAVILLER 

" No : I can't say that I am.'' 

" WJiy are you not one, friend ?" 

I had to wait a moment for an answer, and 
then it came slowly. 

'' Well, for one thing, there are so many 
different religions in the world, that a man 
don't know which one to believe." 

" What do you mean by ' different religions' ? 
I don't understand. Is it the Christian, Mo- 
hammedan, Pagan, &c. ?" 

'' No. I mean so many different churches in 
this country ; and they all profess to be founded 
on the Bible, and bring Bible proofs for what 
they believe, and every one thinks that his way 
is right, and that every one else is wrong, and 
yet their ways are all so different. A man can't 
tell what to think, or which one to believe." 

" What regiment do you belong to, friend ?" 
I asked, as I drew up a hospital stool and 
seated myself near them. 

" The 8th ." 

'' Were you ever in camp for any length of 
time with several other regiments ?" 

^' Oh, yes, several times : there were nearly a 

108 



AT THE CHURCH. 7 

dozen different regiments in our camp down 

in — r 

'' Well, let us suppose that there was your 

Eegiment, the 8th , and the 7th New York, 

and the 6th Minnesota, and the 5th Virginia, 
and the 4th Kansas, &c. &c., — men gathered 
from all parts of the country, and from almost 
every nation in the world, and throw^n together, 
for the time being, in one place. Part of them 
were infantry, part cavalry ; and then there 
were light-artillerymen, batteries, &c. Now, I 
suppose that no two of those regiments had 
uniforms exactly alike. Had they V^ 

'' Well, no ;• not just exactly.^^ 

" There was always a little difference, so that 
you could tell what regiment a man belonged to, 
when you saw him. Sometimes the difference 
was in the cut of their coats, or the shape of 
their hats or caps. Sometimes it was only a 
little difference in the trimmings or the badges. 
Sometimes two of them were so nearly alike 
that you thought them the same, until you 
looked at the . badges on their caps ; while you 
could tell infantry from cavalry and artillery- 

109 



/ 



8 THE CAVILLER 

men as far as you could see them. Couldn't 
you V 

"Yes/' 

" But there were three things about them ex^ 
adly alike, always. They all wore the blue. 
They all belonged to the U. S. A. And they 
were all out in the service of their country. 
Isn't that true?'' 

"Yes." 

"Now, the different Christian churches, — I 
mean by ^ Christian' those that found their hopes 
for heaven on the Rock Christ Jesus, as He is 
offered to us in the gospel. Those who deny 
His divinity, or build upon any thing else than 
Christ and Him crucified, have no right to the 
name of CAm^-ians, — all these different churches 
are only different regiments in the Lord's army 
on earth. 

"Their ^badges' (or names) may be different; 
they may have different forms of church 
government, and they may differ on points 
of doctrine which are not essential to salvation ; 
but they all have the same creed (as you will 
see, if you examine their church books). They 

110 



AT THE CHURCH. 9 

all rally around the ' Banner of the cross/ and 
follow the One great ' Captain of their salva- 
tion / ^ and, if they are His true soldiers, they 
are all fighting against sin and Satan, in the 
one common cause of Christ. Do you under- 
stand V' 

^^Yes. But what is the use of so many 
different churches ? Why couldn^t they as well 
all be in one V^ 

^^What was the use of so many different 
regiments in the U. S. A. ? Don^t you suppose 
that Government had wise reasons for breaking 
it up into regiments and divisions ? So, God, 
for wise reasons, has permitted the church, in His 
earthly government, to be composed of different 
regiments and divisions, of which Christ is the 
commander-in-chief.^ They are all different 
members of the same body, of which Christ is 
the^head.^^ 

'^ I know that those different denominations are 
often brought up as an objection to the church ; 
but I think that that is a mistake. I think 



1 Heb. 2 : 9, 10. 2 j^a. 55 : 4. 

om. 12 : 4, 5. Col. 1 : '. 
10* 111 



3 1 Cor. 12 : 12-31. Eom. 12 : 4, 5. Col. 1 : 18. 



10 THE CAVILLER 

that, instead of being an objection, they are 
a great advantage, rather ; and I will tell you 
why. 

" When you w^ere down there in camp, men 
from the same part of the country, and so with 
tastes and habits more nearly alike, were gene- 
rally thrown together in the same regiment, and 
so there was apt to be more harmony among 
themselves. Is that true f^ 

" Yes, as a general thing.^^ 

" Then, on review-days, especially when you 
had visitors, each regiment had a kind of pride 
as to which would make the best appearance ] 
and each man in it would brighten up his arms 
and uniform, so as not to bring discredit upon 
his regiment in the presence of the others. 
As a general thing, you were in less danger of 
falling into careless habits than if your regi- 
ment had been there alone, and there had 
not been something of this spirit of rivalry. 
One regiment acted as a spur on the others : 
didn't it r 

"Yes: I believe it did.'' 

" Then, too, a regiment was more careful in 

112 



AT THE ciiuncir. 11 

its actions, because it knew tliat tlie others were 
watching it. You acted as a cliech upon each 
other, too, dicln^t you V^ 

" Yes, I think so/' 

^^Xow, men, even after they become Christians, 
are still of a great variety of tastes and tempera- 
ments ; and the different branches of the church 
give men of similar tastes and temperaments 
the opportunity of uniting together, and thus 
secures greater harmony among themselves, for 
one thing. 

" Then, too, the church is always on review, 
under its Captain's eye, and it know^s that the 
world is always a spectator ; and so its different 
branches act as a spur upon each other ] and if 
that spirit of rivalry is prompted by a pure 
desire for the glory and interests of Christ's 
kingdom, and zeal to see who will do the most 
for His cause^ it is all right. 

" Then, too, the churches act as a cliech upon 
each other. There is one church which has 
kept itself in one church only, and it does not 
recognize any other church as a critic; and, as a 
consequence^ all manner of heresies, and abuses, 

113 



12 THE CAVILLER 

and superstitions, have crept into it, and stay in 
it, and grow. 

" But the Protestant church, divided as it is 
into different denominations, and each denomi- 
nation knowing that the others are watching it 
and criticizing it, has to be more careful ; and 
if any heresy creeps into one, the others expose 
it to the world at once; and, if the church still 
clings to the error, it is cast out of the sister- 
hood, and takes its rank among the ^isms/ 
And so the church of Christ, as a body, is kept 
purer than it would otherwise be. 

" For instance : suppose that a Methodist 
minister preaches some strange doctrine. If the 
Methodist church does not check him, the Pres- 
byterian, or Lutheran, or Baptist, or some other 
denomination, takes him up, and exposes him 
to the v/orld, and censures the Methodist 
church for keeping him in it; and so that 
church, for the sake of its own reputation, has 
to check him. 

"Suppose that a Presbyterian or a Baptist 
journal prints some wrong doctrine. If its 
own church docs not correct it, a Methodist, or 

lU 



AT THE CHURCH. 13 

Episcopalian, or Congregational, or some other 
church paper, holds it up before the eye of the 
world, and censures it, until it is silenced ; and so 
it can do less mischief than it otherwise could. 
Isn't that true f' 

" Yes ; they do watch each other pretty closely, 
that's a fact; and that is one thing I blame 
them for : they get to quarrelling among them- 
selves, sometimes, and running each other down. 
Why, sometimes they act as if they hated each 
other worse than they did us outsiders, — as if 
they didn't believe there was a Christian in any 
other church than their own." 

^^If you had quarrelled and fought with 
soldiers in other regiments, while you were in 
camp, or on the march together, and treated 
them as if you thought that they were not true 
soldiers because they did not belong to the 8th 

, would it have been because there were 

different regiments there, or because you your- 
self were a bad man, and there were bad men in 
the others who would quarrel with you ?" 

" The fault would have been with them and 
me, I suppose." 

115 



14 THE CAVILLER 

^' Yes. Suppose that fifty men out of each 
regiment should commence quarrelling, and 
fighting, and killing each other : the fault 
would be, not because the army was divided 
into regiments, but because there were those 
fifty bad men in each. And it Avould be a very 
great wrong in them to act so, outside of the sin 
to themselves and against each other ; because, 
when there is division in the camp, they spend 
the strength in fighting each other, that they 
ought to spend against the enemy, and so weaken 
themselves, and give the enemy the advantage ; 
and they would not do that if they had the real 
interest of their cause at heart. And, besides, 
those fifty men bring disgrace upon the whole 
regiment, in the eyes of the world, although 
every one of the other nine hundred and fifty 
may be a good man. 

'' I have known a whole regiment to be marched 
out in disgrace, with their colours trailing, for 
the fault of a fewer number than that; although 
I knew many of the others, and knew that they 
were good men, and had no hand in the wrong ; 
and yet they had to suffer, in the eyes of tlie 

116 



AT THE CHUECH. 15 

lookers-on, for the sin of their comrades. Isn^t 
that true V 

" Yes, I suppose so/^ 

^^Now, this division, and quarrelling, and 
envying, in the church, is oiot because the church 
is divided into different branches, but because 
tliere are bad (as well as good) men in each of 
them. And they were in it as far back as the 
time of Paul;^ and he commands us to ^ avoid 
such men, for they that are such serve not our 
Lord Jesus Christ.^ They are not His true 
disciples; they do not have the interests of His 
cause at heart, as they should, or they would not 
thus wound Him in the house of His friends, 
and bring reproach upon His cause in the pre- 
sence of His enemies. 

" And Satan, and the world, rejoice at divisions 
in the camp of the church ; because it draws off 
the strength that should be used to resist them, 
and gives them the opportunity, while the church 
is occupied with its own quarrels, to plant their 

1 1 Cor. 1 : 11-14. 1 Cor. 3 : 3, 4. 1 Cor. 1 : 10. 
Eom. 16 : 17, 18. Acts 15 : 1. Phil. 3 : 3. Kom. 2 : 
29. 

H7 



16 THE CAVILLER 

batteries a little nearer to it, without being ob- 
served, and so gain an advantage. 

^^ Now, such strife between churches is very- 
wrong, — a very great wrong; but it does not 
spring from the fact that the church is divided 
into different branches; but from the carnal 
hearts in each, who care more for their own 
church than they do for the glory and interests 
of Christ's kingdom on earth, — the selfish, 
sinful hearts, who care more for what is ^mine' 
than they do for what is ' Christ's/ '' 

'^ But how do such men get into the church ? 
I thought the churches you call ^orthodox' 
would not take any one into them unless they 
professed what is called a ' change of heart ;^ 
and yet I have know^n plenty of church-mem- 
bers that had no more religion about them 
than I have. Why, I've seen them — plenty of 
times — do things that I wouldn't do ; and I 
don't pretend to be a Christian." 

" Let us see if w^e can think liow some of 
them got into the church. 

^^When the w^ar first broke out, don't you 
remember what excitement and enlhusiaom 

118 



AT THE CHURCH. 17 

there were all over the country? How popular 
soldiers were then ! how regiments were cheered 
and welcomed as they passed ! The current of 
popular feeling ran into the army, and it car- 
ried many a one into camp and battle-field, who 
did not go there from pure patriotism, even 
although some may have mistaken the feeling 
that prompted them for that at the time. Do 
you believe that?'^ 

^^Yes; Ido.^^ 

'^ Then, after the war began, some men went 
into the army to save their property, or for 
some personal gain or interest; some, because 
they were expected to go, or because the most 
of their companions had gone, and they would 
be despised by many if they should remain at 
home ; some, for fear they would be drafted, or 
from a great variety of motives, which they 
knew themselves were not patriotism. Is that 
truef^ 

"Yes; I believe it.'' 

" Now, Government could not look into those 
men's hearts and say, ^You are not prompted 
by the- ri'j;ht motive,- — you are not a true sol- 

11 119 



18 TJIE CAVILLER 

dier/ It had to take a man on his profession 
of desire to serve' his country. But when 
such came to meet the realities and hardships 
of the war^ these were the class of men your 
^ deserters' came from. But, even if the fear of 
the disgrace or punishment of desertion kept 
them still in the army, they had no real love 
for their country in their hearts. You could 
tell that by the way they talked and acted.'' 

'^ That's true : I have seen such men myself." 

^^But then it wouldn't be right to judge the 
whole army by that class, or to make their being 
in it an excuse for your not enlisting : would 
it?" ^ 

"No." 

" There would be all the more need that you 
should be a true soldier; and your personal 
duty to be that would still be as great as if 
there were no such men in the army : wouldn't 
it?" 

" I suppose so." 

"Now, at the time of what are called ^re- 
vivals of religion,' a great many become true 
Christians, no doubt; but there is very often, 

]20 



AT THE CHUECH. 19 

at such seasons^ in all churches, something of 
excitement, or of a feeling that is not true re- 
ligion ; although many who are under its influ- 
ence may really think that their feelings are 
caused by true love for God. The popular 
current runs into the churchy and many drift 
along with it who have no right to be numbered 
among God^s children. They show that by 
their lives afterwards. That is the class that 
the most of what are called ' backsliders^ come 
from. 

^^Then, too, I think we would not judge 
wrongly, if we should say that men often de- 
ceive themselves by thinking that they have 
^ experienced religion,^ as they call it, at other 
seasons, besides in revivals, when in reality they 
know nothing at all about it. Some, through 
wilful ignorance, because they do not examine 
the foundation of their hopes as they should, 
may go up to the judgment-seat with that false 
impression;^ but others, although they may find 
out their mistake, regard for their friends, or 
the dread of disgrace, may keep them in the 

1 Matt. 7 : 21-24. 

121 



20 THE CAVILLER 

ranks of the church ; but their lives show to 
the world that they are not really God\s chil- 
dren. Some go into it, too, because when they 
become old enough their friends expect them to 
unite with the church. 

'' I think we should not judge wrongly, either, 
if we should say that motives of worldly interest 
sometimes take a man into a church who has 
no right to be there. You will find the most 
of your inconsistent and worldly j^rofessors in 
these last classes; but they are not Christians^ 
although they may wear that name. 

'' Now, those who received such men into the 
church could not look into their hearts and say, 
^ You are not a true Christian. You have no 
right here.^ God only can judge the heart. 
The church can only accept a man on his pro- 
fession of change of heart and faith in Christ, 
and so is liable to nnmher false professors among 
the true. 

" But it is wrong to bring up such men as a 
reproach upon the true soldiers of the cross; 
and you have been watching them closely 
enough to see where they do wrong, and take 

122 



AT THE CHURCH. 21 

warning, — have been reading them more atten- 
tively than you have read your Bible, perhaps; 
and you have a very good idea of how a Chris- 
tian ought to live, and it would be wise in you 
to set such men an example. 

" Me ! Why, I don^t profess to be a Chris- 
tian ! I don^t make any profession of religion." 

" I know. But you ought to profess it, and 
possess it too. You know that. 

^^ Will you tell me this, friend ? What claim 
have I on you, that you should set me an ex- 
ample f^ 

'' On me ! Why, not any." 

^^ What right have / to expect or claim an ex- 
ample from youf^ 

" Why, none at all." 

^'And yet I have just as much right to expect 
or claim one from yoUy as you from me. The 
fact of my professing to be a Christian, while 
you do not, does not alter the case. No man 
living has a right to claim an example from 
another, — not even from his minister, ^^ 

^^Why, I thought some of these men pre- 
tended to have a ' call.^ " 

11^^ 123 



22 THE CAVILLER 

" Not to be an exarivple for you, friend. God 
^calls^ no man living to do that; neither do His 
children profess it. But, He gives to every man 
such gifts as He pleases; some for one thing, 
some for another, as He sees best.-^ 

'' If Pie gives to one talent and opportunity 
for preaching or teaching, and he does not use 
that gift, ^ every one according to his several 
ability,^ ^ or abuses it, or mistakes it, he is account- 
able for it to Gody not to man. And when the 
day of reckoning comes, he will have to ' ren- 
der an account' of it to his Lord, just as you 
will have to ' render an account' to your God 
for the time and talents and opportunities, 
whatever they were, that He has been giving 
you all these long years, and which you have 
wasted, or not improved, or used in the service 
of Satan. 

"That is such a strange idea that so many 
have, — this watching professors of religion and 
making their hypocrisy or sin an excuse for their 
own sinning, and claiming an ^example' from 

lEph. 4: 11. IPet. 4: 10, 11. 
2 Matt. 25 : 15. Kom. 12 : 6-8. 
124 



AT THE CHURCH. 23 

them, and feeling as if they were wronged if 
they do not always get it. 

^^You will see it in the same family, some- 
times, among those who have had equal oppor- 
tunities for studying God's word and knowing 
their own duty. 

" When one of their number — not always the 
oldest, even — makes a profession of religion, the 
others keep watching closely ; and if he or she 
does not always come up to their idea of how a 
Christian ought to live, they say, with a sneer, 
^There's your Christian for you;' and they 
rejoice over the fault, and have a self-satisfied 
feeling, as if anotKer^s wrong-doing was an 
excuse for their sin, or excused them from doing 
right. 

" Sometimes they bring it up as an argument 
against religion, too, or as a^ excuse for their 
not professing it; when in reality that feeling 
which they have in their hearts is one of the 
strongest arguments in proof of the purity and 
potver of the Christian religion. 

(( Why, nobody makes any ado about an infidel 
doing wrong! They do not expect any good 

125 



24 THE CAVILLER 

from his principles; while they do expect that 
religion in the heart of a man will bring forth 
good fruits in his life. 

'' You have read the Bible often^ I suppose, 
while you could read V^ 

"Yes/^ 

"God has drawn one perfect example^ in that 
for you to follow^ and only one, — the Lord 
Jesus. That is all you need, and all He gives 
you any right to expect. You are not required 
to follow a Paul^ even, except as he followed 
Christ.^ Neither is Paul, or any one who has 
ever lived, required to set an example for you, 
except so far as their duty t^^ God requires them 
to use God's own gifts to them for the advance- 
ment of Christ's kingdom in the hearts of men.^ 
Our duty to man springs out of our duty to 
God, — has its foundation onli/ in the obedience 
which w^e owe to His commands. 

" I^et us see how your excuse would work in 
worldly matters. Suppose some one should 

1 1 Pet. 2 : 21, 22. John 13 : 15. Matt. 11 : 29. 1 John 
2 : 6. Heb. 7 : 26. 

^ 1 Cor. 11 : 1. 3 1 Cor. 9 : 4-7, 19-24. 

126 



AT THE CHUKCII. 25 

come into this room, now, and offer yon a ten- 
dollar gold piece, — pnre gold yon knew it was. 
I think yon wonld be very foolish to refnse it 
bec*anse this comrade had a counterfeit ten-dollar 
piece in his pocket : wouldn^t yon V^ 

"You believe that there is sncli a thing as 
true relio;ion? Yon have seen those von be- 
lieved to be trne Christians : haven^t von ?'^ 

"Yes,— afew/^ 

" One snch wonld be sufficient proof that there 
is trne religion in existence, and that you too 
could obtain it. 

" Counterfeit Christians are only another 
proof of this, because men cannot counterfeit 
any thino; which does not exist ; and vou are 
not wise to refuse what you know to be true 
religion, because somebody else has its coun- 
terfeit. But you do not act on this principle in 
worldly matters. 

"How many little children have you at home, 
fi'iend?^' 

" Four.'' 

" You have some thriftless, perhaps drunken, 

127 



2G THE CAVILLER 

neighbour, who neglects or abuses his children, 
and lets them grow up in idleness and want and 
sinr 

^^Yes." 

"You w^ould not plead his example as an 
excuse for your neglecting or abusing your own 
dear little ones. ^No/ you say; ^I must pro- 
vide for my own family, and try to raise them 
aright, no matter what my neighbour may do 
to his/ You would look upon him as a ivarrh" 
ing, rather than an example, 

" So must you attend to your own souFs sal- 
vation, no matter what your neighbours may do. 
Their wrong-doing should warn you from 
wrong, rather than excuse you in it. 

"Again, suppose that this comrade should go 
out into Ward B, now, and kill one of the sick 
men there; you go out after him, and kill an- 
other. You are both arrested and brought to 
trial for doing so. You plead, ' This comrade 
did so. He professes to be a Christian, and I 
thought that that would excuse me.' 

"You know bettor. Such a plea as that 
would not excuse you at the bar of your coun- 

128 



AT THE CHURCH. 27 

try; neither will it excuse you at the bar of 
your God/^ 

'' But wouldn't it be a loorse sin in Mm to do 
such a thing than for me f^ 

" The laws of your country would not make 
any such distinction, when you knew as well as 
he did, that you were doing wrong. They would 
hold you both equally accountable; and so do the 
laws of your God. I cannot find any such dis- 
tinction made in the Bible ; and that is the ' law 
that you are to be judged by.'^ 

'^ I read there, not, ' The Christian shall not 
kill,^ but ' Thou^ — whoever you are, professor or 
non-professor — ^shalt not kill.^ Not, ^If the 
Christian bears false witness against his neigh- 
bour, or swears, so may the sinner;' but 'Thou 
shalt not bear false witness.' ' Thou shalt not 
take the name of the Lord thy God in vain; 
for the Lord will not hold him [any one] guilt- 
less that taketh His name in vain.'^ 

" That is such a strange idea which so many 
have, that God's laws are not as binding on 
them, and their sins are less sinful in Plis sight, 

1 Eom. 2 : 12-17. 2 ^^^ 20 : 3-18. 

129 



28 THE CAVILLER 

because tliey do not have on the uniform of 
some church. That they are at more liberty to 
sin before they profess to be a Christian than 
they are after it. 

'^ The only difference bet\\'^en you and this 
comrade^ in the case we have mentioned^ would 
be this : if he was a true Christian^ he would 
not act so. And when he and you stood at the 
bar of God; he would have the sins of perjury 
(in his church-vows) and hypocrisy to answer 
for^ besides the sin of murder. You would have 
the sin of murder^ and the sins of open disobe- 
dience to God; and neglect of, and contempt for, 
His ordinances. And, if this comrade's hypo- 
crisy should have been a ' stumbling-block' in 
the w^ay of others to Christy and a reproach 
upon His causC; your indifference to God^ and 
cavillings at what belongs to Him, have had 
their influence in keeping others back from the 
Saviour^ too. 

^' I will tell you what I think, friend. If 
the gates of heaven are closed to me on that 
last day, I don't believe that it will make any 
difference to me what hind of sins closed them, 

130 



AT THE CHUECH. 29 

if I have to stand outside while the redeemed 
pass by me into heaven, and I know that I 
could so easily have been among their num- 
ber. 

" I don^t think it will give me the least com- 
fort, then, if I should see thousands of false 
professors standing with me, or that it will 
make much difference, whether I am standing 
nearer to the gate than they, or farther from it, 
if I have the certainty in my heart that it has 
closed on me forever. 

" Let us suppose that that day has come, and 
that you have gone up to that judgment-seat 
(as you will have to go some day, whether you 
are ready for it or not), and you are standing 
there among all who have ever lived, or will 
live, to the end of time.^ 

" This world has passed away, with all that 
belonged to it.^ The church, in this world, was 
only an institution of God^s government on 
earth. It has fulfilled the purpose for which 
He organized it, and it too has passed away. 

" Whether you had your name written on its 

1 Key. 6 : 15-17. ^ ;ReY. 21 : 1. 

12 131 



V 



30 THE CAVILLER 

books or not, will make little difference to you 
then. The question will be, ^ Is your name 
written in the Lamb's Book of Life'?^ That 
only will save you, that day. 

'^A\\ the wealth and honors and power that 
men had here, belonged to this earth, and have 
perished with it,^ leaving only the responsibility 
for the use that was made of them, upon the 
souls of those who owned them.^ 

"You glance around. You see Queen Vic- 
toria on the same platform with the poorest of 
her subjects ; the President beside the humblest 
citizen; the minister beside the lowliest of his 
flock. 

" Each soul stripped of every covering which 
it wore in the eyes of men.^ Every soul naked 
and open to the eye of God and angels and 
men, standing side by side on the same level, — 
just as every soul stands on the same level, and 
on the same platform, in God^s sight noio,^ 



1 Eev. 20 : 12-15. Key. 21 : 27. ^1 Tim. 6 : 7. 

3 Matt. 25 : 14-31. 

* EccL 12 : 14. Ps. 44 : 21. Matt. 16 : 27. 
5 Kom. 2 : 11. Eph. 6 : 9. Col. 3 : 25. Acts 10 : 10. 
132 



AT THE CHUECH. 31 

" You find yourself placed at the left hand/ 
when you are called upon to ^render up your 
accounts/ 

" God^s eye is looking into your naked soul 
as it has been looking down into it all these 
years. How loill you answer Himf 

^^ Will you say^ ^ There were so many diiferent 
churches, I didn't know v/hich was right' ?^ God 
had put the Bible into your hands to teach you right 
from wrong J and show you the road^ to heaven. 

^^You see beside you some false professors, 
and you say, ' They did not set me a good ex- 
ample/ Christ, your great Exemplar^ is your 
Judged He warned you of such, while He lived 
on the earth, and left ^ orders' for you not to 
follow them.^ 

" You say, ^ I thought their sin would excuse 
mine.' Why, friend, you knew, even w^hile you 
watched them upon the earth, that they were on 
the road to the left hand.' And you knew that 
God had told you^ that ^ Every one of us shall 

1 Matt. 25 : 31-46. 2 Heb. 4 : 13. Jer. 23 : 24. 

3 John 14 : 6 ; 10 : 9. ^ Acts 17 : 31. 
5 Matt. 7 : 15-24. ^ Eom. 14 : 12. 

133 



32 THE CAVILLER 

give account of himself to God/ that, at that 
judgment-seat, ' every one sliall receive the 
things done in his body, according to that he 
hath done, whether it be good or bad,^ ^ and that 
He ' will render to every man according to his 
deeds/ ^ There will be no ^refuge of lies' ^ for 
you to creep into, that day. It will aiatter no- 
thing to you what wrong others have done, un- 
less you have helped them to do it ; then you 
will have to answer for that too. 

" Such excuses will not do then, friend ; and 
it is not wise to try to quiet your conscience 
now with any thing that will not stand in God^s 
sight that day. 

^^And there is the real trouble with you to- 
day. You are fighting against God's Spirit. 
It has touched your conscience, and made you 
feel that you are a sinner, and you are not will- 
ing to give up your sins, and so you are trying 
to throw the blame on the church, or on pro- 
fessing Christians, and you are glad when you 
can detect an error in them, as if that made 
your sin the less. But it will not do, friend ; 
1 2 Cor. 5 : 16. ^ j>ojn. 2:6. ^ jg^. 28 ; 15, 17. 

134: 



AT THE CHURCH. 33 

you know it will not do/^ I saicl^ as I rose to 
leave. 

'' Let me beseech yoii^ in Christ's steady as 
though He Himself did plead with you by us ; 
throw away all these empty excuses, which will 
not answer you when you come into His pre- 
sence, and ^be ye reconciled to God/ noiv,'^^ 

I saw him several times in the weeks that 
followed this, but only for a few moments at a 
time; enough to show me that the Holy Spirit 
was doing His ^law-work^^ in his heart, show- 
ing him his sins, and making him feel his need 
of a Saviour, and drawing him to Jesus ; and 
wdien that is the case w^ith one who knows his 
duty as w^ell as he did, the Spirit is the best 
teacher. Words sometimes do harm. 

His eyes were growing dimmer all the time, 
too, — poor man ! — shutting him out more com- 
pletely from the world, and giving the light of 
the Spirit better opportunity to show him the 
inner chambers of his soul. 

At last, one day, as I was going through a 
sick ward in another part of the building, I 

1 2 Cor. 5 : 20. ^ q^I. 3 : 24, 25. John 16 : 8, 9. 

12- 135 



34 THE CAVILLER 

caught a glimpse of the side of his face on a 
cot, a little distance from me. 

He was sitting quietly, with his knapsack on 
the floor, at his feet; and such a look of con- 
tentment about the lines of his mouth, as his 
profile stood out from the white walls of the 
ward, — a look so changed that I could not help 
hoping it was traced there by a heart at peace 
with God. 

He had a narrow bandage, or shade (I forget 
which), over his eyes ; but I have not forgotten 
the pleased start and quick turning of his head 
at the sound of my voice, as I stopped to speak 
with a comrade near him. 

"I am so glad you came to-day,^^ he said, 
holding out his hand, as I came up and spoke 
to him. ^^I got my discharge this morning, and 
am going home to-morrow; and I wanted so 
much to see you before I left.^^ 

" You have good news to tell me T^ 

^^ Yes, I hope so.^^ And it ivas '' good news' 
I listened to, as I sat down on the cot beside 
him, while he told me what '' great things God 
had done for his soul.^' 

136 



AT THE CHURCH. 35 

I think that there is no sweeter, purer plea- 
sure, outside of the love of Christ in our own 
souls, than comes into the heart at such a mo- 
ment as that. And I think I have seldom re- 
joiced with any one more than I did with this 
blind brother at my side, as we glanced over 
some of the evidences we can have of a change 
of heart, and found the answering marks in his 
soul (if his heart did not deceive him). 

It was so sad to think of such as he had been, 
passing a long, weary night of years on earth, 
perhaps, with no comfort in his heart, and no 
heaven to go into when it was ended. 

For he was almost entirely blind now. 

" I can scarcely tell day from night, now,^^ he 
told me. ^^And the doctor says he can^t do any 
thing more for my eyes. I shall never see with 
them in this world any more.^^ 

" But you will open them again in heaven, 
you hope; and you can carry that hope with 
you in your heart all the way there. Oh, I am 
so glad ! — so glad !^^ 

'' Yes,^' he said, quietly, " I knew you would 
be ; but you can^t be half as glad as I am.^^ 

137 



36 THE CAVILLER 

We tallccd a little of the duties of his new life. 

^^^ What can you do for the Master, brother, 
when you go hon>e?" 

'^Well, I have been thinking I could do 
something for Him in my own family, perhaps. 
My wife is a good woman, and we have a little 
home of our own, and God will provide for 
them and me some way. But I have been a 
very v/icked man [I had thought as much], 
and never cared much for my own soul, or 
theirs either, while I was with them. And I 
have been thinking how I had neglected my 
children ; and I thought I would get them to 
read the Bible and other good books to me; and 
we could talk about what we read, and perhaps 
God would help me to teach them to love Jesus, 
too.'^ 

" Yes : try to take every one of them on the 
road to heaven w^ith you. If you are not to 
look into their faces here any more, wouldn't 
it be pleasant to look upon them all next in the 
presence of that dear, pitying Saviour who 
opened the eyes of the blind when He lived on 
earth? There will be no blind men in that 

138 



AT THE CHURCH. 37 

^ happy land/ brother ! Only a little while, and, 
if you ^endure to the end' of the way, you have 
His promise that ^ Thine eyes shall see the King 
in His beauty. They shall behold the land that 
is very far oif/ and Hhere is no night there.' ^ 
^Thy sun shall no more go down, neither shall 
thy moon withdraw itself; for the Lord shall 
be thine everlasting light, and the days of thy 
mourning shall be ended.' ''^ 

1 Isa. 33 : 17. ^ ;Kev. 22 : 5. ^ ig^. 60 : 20. 

139 



"CAN'T UNDERSTAND THE BIBLE." 



CAN'T UNDERSTAND THE BIBLE. 



The Soldiers^ Reading-Room^ in the rooms of 
the central office of the United States Christian 
Commission in , was adjoining the pack- 
ing-room ; and very often, when I was in the 
latter, selecting reading-matter, and such articles 
as I needed for the wards, soldiers y/ould stroll 
in through the open door, and stand, and look 
around, — sometimes with such a wistful look 
on their faces, as if they were in trouble and 
wanted some one to speak to them. 

Whenever- any such came up, and stood near 
me, for any length of time, I always felt that 
God sent him, — that I had a message from the 
Master, to his soul; and, no matter how great 
my haste might be, I must wait to see what it 
was. 

3 13 143 



4 can't understand the bible. 

One day^ while I was busy behind the counter, 
a soldier came up^ and stood on the opposite side, 
near me. 

He was one of the city guards, I could see by 
his dress and arms, — off duty for an hour or 
two, — and had strolled into the rooms, to pass 
away the time, or perhaps seek counsel or com- 
fort. 

I waited until I had nearly finished, and still 
he stood there. 

^^Have you a ^Guide-book' for the road, 
friend?'' I said, turning to him, as I took 
down a small Bible from the shelf. 

" Oh, yes ; I brought a Bible from home, and 
I have carried it with me ever since." 

^^ Are you walking in the ^way' it points out?'^ 

" I am afraid not." 

" What road are you travelling, friend ?" 

" Well, I don't know," he said. '' Not the 
one marked out for me in the Bible, I'm 
afraid." 

"Suppose your captain should order you 
to go to Washington City, and should give 
you a guide-book, with every step of the 

144 



can't understand the bible. 



way plainly marked out in it^ and you should 
carry it in your pocket, and perhaps take 
it out, and read it every day, and yet keep 
walking directly in the road to JSlew Orleans. 
What good would studying the guide-book do 
your 

^^ Xot any good at all/' 

^^ What would you think of a man who would 
carry a copy of the laws of the United States 
in his pocket, and read them over every little 
while, and yet break those laws every day and 
hour of his life, — break some of them even 
Avhile he was reading the law forbidding him to 
do so f ' 

" I should think that it was very wrong, as 
well as foolish, in him. Reading the laws 
would do no good, unless he obeyed them.'' 

" Now, we ought to read God's laws in the 
Bible, and study them, too, a great deal ; but 
reading the Bible will do no good, unless w^e 
do what it tells us." 

'^ Yes ; that's true. I do think a great deal 
about these things," he said, after a pause. " I 
have done it, at times, all my life ; but, when- 

145 



6 can't understand the bible. 

ever I do^ I get so bewildered^ I scarcely know 
what is rights or wliat to think^ sometimes.'^ 

'' What are some of the things that trouble 
you ? Perhaps I can help you a little/^ 

^' Well, there is one thing that I never could 
understand/^ he said, slowly. ^^It is this. If 
God foreordained all things, then He must have 
foreordained sin; and if He foreordained sin, 
then am I accountable for sinning?'^ 

^^Did you ever study geometry, friend?'^ 

^^Yes; a little,^^ he said, looking up in sur- 
prise at such a question, then. 

"Let me give you an ^axiom,^ to carry in 
your mind always, friend ; and it will help you 
to demonstrate such propositions as that. It is 
this : — 

" There is no sin independent of God^s law. 
Keeping God^s km makes inght ; breaking God's 
law makes wrong} Is that true?^^ 

" Yes : I suppose so.'^ 

"Nothing is, for you, a sin ^ j^er se,^ or in itself. 
You cannot conceive of a right or wrong in- 
dependent of God's law.^ It is only sin, as it 

1 1 Jolm 3 : 4. Kom. 4 : 15. '^ Koin. o : 20. Horn. 7 : 7. 
lit) 



can't understand the bible. 7 

does not agree with what He has commanded, 
or does what He has forbidden.^ God's law is 

like this, ^ I said, drawing 

a straight line on a little book lying on the 
counter. ^^God says,^ ^This is the way: walk 
ye m it.' If you do not come up to the line 
(or, omit duty^), you disobey Him, and, so, sin. 
If you overstep it (or commit wrong ^), you dis- 
obey Him, and, so, sin. Is that true ?'' 

" I think so.'' 

"God is absolute ^Jehovah-tsidkenu,'^ ^ The 
Lord our righteousness,' the Supreme Lawgiver^ 
of the Universe, Himself. 

"' There is no one higher than He, to give 
Him laws ; ^ no one greater, who has the 'power 
to' make laws for Him, or the right to claim His 
obedience.^ Consequently, He cannot violate 
law ; because it does not exist for Him. 

" Consequently, He cannot sin ; for ^ sin is a 
transgression of the law ;'^ and ^ where no law 

1 Kom. 5 : 13. ^ jg^. 30 : 21. ^ ^att. 23 : 23. 
^ Lev. 5 : 17. ^ j^j,^ 23 : 6. 

6 Isa. 33 : 22. James 4 : 12. Psa. 103 : 19. Isa. 46 : 10. 
^ Dan. 4 : 17. Dent. 4 : 35. 

8 Dan. 4 : 35. Psa. 115 : 3. Psa. 135 : 6. ^ i j ohn 3 : 4. 

13- 147 



8 can't understand the bible. 

is, there is no transgression.' ^ Do you under- 
stand ?'' 

" Yes.'' 

^' His will is the standard of right .^"^ conse- 
quently, whatever He wills, or ordains, or 
commands to be done, is right.^ For instance : 
If He should command me to strike a dagger 
to your heart, at this moment, as you stand 
there, there would be no sin in the act ; because 
I should be obeying His command; and His 
will makes right. The sin would be in my 
not doing it, after He had commanded it. But 
His order to me, ' Thou shalt not kill/ ^ still 
stands in full force ;^ and the sin, now, would 
consist in my disobeying that order. 

^^ Again. For reasons existing in the mind 

and will of the all- wise and just Jehovah, and, 

consequently, right reasons,^ God once suspended 

that law for the Jews, and ordered them to go 

up and destroy all the inhabitants of Canaan, 

and take possession of their country .'^ 

1 Rom. 4 : 15. ^ jy^^^^t. 7 : 21. Rom. 12 : 2. 

3 Rom. 9 : 14. Psalm 92 : 15. Dent. 32 : 4. 

* Luke 18 : 20. ^ Matt. 5 : 17, 18. 

6 Rev. 15 : 3. ' Deut. 7 : 1-5. 

148 



can't understand the bible. 



" It was no sin in the Jews to kill the wicked 
inhabitants ; because God had ordered them to 
do it. They would have sinned if they had not 
done it^ and so disobeyed Him. 

^^It was right for God to give that order; 
because His will makes right. It was right for 
Him to re-enact^ or re-enforce^ that law^ for Jew 
and Gentile^ as He did; because He willed to do 
it^ and His will is the standard of right. Is 
that true?'' 

" Yes : I think it is." 

^^ Well^ then^ if He is absolute God^ the 
Supreme Lawgiver^ Himself^ and ivhatever He 
Avills^ or commands, or ordains beforehand to be 
done, is ^Hght, how can God foreordain sin f It 
is an utter impossibility. 

'^ How could He foreordain you to sin? because 
whatever He ordains before, or foreordains you 
to do, is in accordance with His will that you 
should do, and, consequently, not sin. Do you 
understand ?" 

^^Yes, — that far," he said, slowly. ^^But, 
then, the Bible speaks about God having fore- 
ordained some men to be damned." 

149 



10 CAN^T UNDERSTAND THE BIBLE. 

" Where do you find that passage^ friend ? 
I have never seen it/^ 

^^ I can't tell exactly where ; but it seems to 
me that I have read about God having fore- 
ordained some men to be saved, and some to 
be damned/' 

" Not to be damned. You never read such a 
sentence as that in the Bible; because it is not 
in it. 

" If He had foreordained any one to be 
damned, He must have foreordained the sin for 
which they were punished ; and we have seen 
that that is an impossibility. 

^^But God tells you just the opposite of that, 
in the Bible, friend. He tells you that hell was 
not prepared for man (like those mansions 
which Christ has gone before to prepare for 
those that love Him^), but for the devil and 
his angels ; ^ and He tells you repeatedly that 
He does not want you to persist in going there, 
that He is not willing that any one should 
perish.^ ^As I live, saith the Lord God, I 

1 John 14 : 2. ^ lyjatt. 25 : 41. 

3 2 Pet. 3 : 9. Ezek. 18 : 30-32. 
150 



can't understand the bible. 11 

have no pleasure in the death of the wicked ; 
but that the wicked turn from his wricked 
way^ and live. Turn ye^ turn ye ; for why will 
ye die V ^ 

" But He does say in the Bible, that Christ 
was foreordained to be the Saviour of all who 
would believe on Him, ' before the foundation 
of the world ;' ^ and that whosoever believeth on 
Him shall be saved ; ^ but ^ he that believeth not 
shall be damned.' ^ 

" Let me tell you what I have learned from 
the Bible, friend, and see if it is correct. 

" When God created man, He made him sin- 
less, and without the knowledge of evil,^ and 
forbade him to seek that knowledge.^ You 
know the story of his disobedience.'' 

" He made him an accountable being,^ with the 

power to choose the right and refuse the wrong ; 

and he chose the wrong, and entailed upon you 

and me, and all who have ever lived since then, 

that ,knowledge of evil, and those desires after 

1 Ezek. 33 : 11. ^ i p^t. l : 18-22. ^ j^j^^ 3 : 14-19. 

^ Mark 16 : 16. & Qen. 1 : 27. Eccl. 7 : 29. 

6 Gen. 2 : 16, 17. '^ Gen. 3 : 6. 

8 Kom. 14 : 12. 2 Cor. 5 : 10. 

151 



12 CAN T UNDEESTAND THE BIBLE. 

evil, Avhich only the grace of God in our hearts 
has power to root out of our nature.^ 

" He has given the power, by His grace and 
Spirit, to refuse the evil, and choose the good, to 
every one who will accept that help;^ and He 
has opened up a way by which they might be 
saved from sin and from its punishment.^ 

"Now, God knew, from all eternity, who 
would accept that salvation '^'^ 

"But,^^ he interrupted, "why didn't He make 
all accept it ? Or, else, why did He let sin come 
into the world at all ?'^ 

"Hear what God says about that Himself, 
friend,^' I said, turning to Romans, ninth chapter 
and twentieth verse. 

" ^Nay, but, O man, who art thou that repliest 
against God?' (or, ^answerest again,' or, ' disputest 
with God,' as the margin has it.) ^ Shall the 
thing formed say to him that formed it. Why 
hast thou made me thus ? Hath not the potter 
power over the clay,' &c. &c.^ 



1 Rom. 5 : 12-21. ^ ^zek. 11 : 19, 20. Luke 11 : 13. 
3 John 10 : 9. Matt. 7 : 7, 8. 
* Eom. 8 : 29. 2 Tim. 1 : 9. ^ jya. 45 . 9, 
152 



can't undeestand the bible. 13 

" God has the right to do as He pleases with 
His own creatures. He, seeing the end from 
the beginning, as our finite minds cannot see it, 
and taking counsel with His own wisdom, chose 
to do as He has done ; ^ and^ as we have seen, 
His will makes right.^ 

"We know, now, that we all deserve the 
punishment of sin, because we all have sinned.^ 

" It is only of God's grace, that any of us 
are saved ;^ and He has the right to bestow 
that grace as He pleases; and, so, He says^ that 
' He will have mercy on whom He will have 
mercy, and whom He will He hardeneth' (as in 
the case of Pharaoh), by simply not giving the 
softening influence of the Spirit to those who 
neither seek it, nor wish for it.^ 

" But, as I was going to say, God foreknew 
all things, from eternity to the end of time*^ 
(because, if there was any time in which He 
did not know all things, then He was not, at 
that time, perfect and absolute God). 

1 Isa. 46 : 9, 10. ^ pgaim 33 : 4. ^ ^^^^ 3 . 23. 

* Eph. 2:8. 5 Eom. 9 : 18. « j^oni. 1 : 28. 

•^ Acts 15 : 18. Isa. 46 : 10. 

153 



14 can't understand the bible. 

* ^^He foreknew just what has happened; and, 
so, oufc of His love and mercy, He foreordained 
a Saviour, for all who would accept of Him. 

" That Saviour is the gift of His grace.^ He 
gives all ^ the power to accept that Saviour, if 
they wish it, and seek it, by His Spirit; but He 
will not force any into heaven against their will. 
Heaven would not be heaven, if we did not 
want to go into it. 

" A great many, when they get to thinking 
about these things, put i\\Q foreordaining , or ^pre- 
destinating' to be saved, first, and so get into 
trouble. 

" Let us see the order in which God places 
it,'' I said, turning to Romans, eighth chapter, 
and reading the twenty-ninth and thirtieth 
verses. 

"^For whom He did foreknow. He also did 
predestinate to be conformed to the ima2:e of 
His Son, that He might be the first-born among 
many brethren. 

"^Moreover, whom He did predestinate, them 

1 John 4 : 10. Eom. 6 : 23. Rom. 5 : 15. 

2 John 7 : 37. Rev. 22 : 17. 
154 



.-? 



CAN T UXDERSTAND THE BIBLE. 15 

He also called ; and whom He called, them He 
also justified; and whom He justified, them He 
also glorified/ 

'' You see that Avhen He speaks about those 
whom He foreknew would choose to be saved, 
He says, — 

^^^For whom He Aidi foreknow'^ (He puts His 
foreknoivledge Jirstj observe), those persons (you 
and me, if we choose) ^He also did predestinate/ 
or ^ resolved^ them, ^to be conformed to the 
image of His Son,^ and, so, saved ; ^ and fore- 
ordained that His Son, God, by His own con- 
sent, should die for them, and so save them.^ 

" That was His purpose, existing in His own 
mind, from all eternity, and not affecting any 
one until they come into the world. 

" And then, when men come into the world, 
God calls them, by His Word and Spirit^ (as 
He calls all; as He has called you, many times) ; 
and those who obey that call, ^ them He also 
justifies / ^ ix. He applies, by His Spirit, that 
salvation, purchased by Christ, to their souls ; 

1 2 Cor. 3 : 18. Eph. 1 : 4-7. ^ i p^t. l : 19, 20. 

^ John 15 : 22. Acts 17 : 30. *1 Cor. 6 : 11. 

14 155 



16 can't understand the bible. 

and^ because Christ has paid the debt of all who 
would accept of Him^ they can with justice be 
set free from the penalty of their sins.^ And 
those whom He justifies, them He also glorifies^ 
with His own glory ,^ in heaven. 

'^ And, so, God's ^ Elect/ ^ as they are some- 
times called, seek God's Spirit (they can have 
that always, if they ask it ^), to enable them to 
accept that Saviour, and to obey His laws, and 
to turn from evil, and to seek good, and so 
be prepared for the society of heaven while they 
are down here; and He helps them, by His 
Spirit, to endure to the end ; ^ and so, as it is ex- 
pressed, they ' work out their own salvation ;' 
while, all the time, God gives them Christ, and 
^ works in them,' by His Spirit, ' both to will 
and to do of His own good pleasure ;' ^ for it is 
His own good pleasure^ or will, that they should 
be saved.^ Is that plain ?" 

" Yes : I think it 25." 

" Search the Bible for yourself,^ friend ; and 

1 Acts 13 : 38, 39. 2 i^oj>^, g : 17. ^ 1 p^t. l .. 2. 

* Luke 11 : 13. & Matt. 24 : 13. « Phil. 2 : 12, 13. 

7 Ezek. 18 : 23. Ezek. 33 : 11. Luke 12 : 32. 

8 John 5 : 39. 

156 



CAN^T UNDEESTAND THE 6IBLE. 17 

ask God to give you His Spirit, to help you to 
read it aright. Do not believe one word that I 
tell you, unless it agrees witli God's word." 

^^I have read the Bible a good deal/' he 
said, '^ but I am always coming across some- 
thing that I don't understand; and I am so 
constituted that I can't believe any thing unless 
I do understand it." 

I took a match from the match-safe, near me. 

" Touch that : will you, friend ?" 

He did so. 

'' It is cold : not a bit of heat in it, is there ?'^ 

"No." 

" And this counter : it is cold too, isn't it ?" 

"Yes." 

I drew the match across the counter. "Now 
touch it." 

No : he would not. 

"Why?" 

" Because it w^ill burn me." 

" This was colder than your finger, a moment 

ago, and so was this counter. Now, where did 

that light and heat come from ?" 

" It was in the match." 

157 



18 can't' UNDERSTAND THE BIBLE. 

I could not feel it, nor see it/' 

" No ; because it was latent^ and the friction 
against the counter developed it." 

" Where was it latent, or hidden, in the match? 
Suppose I break this unlighted one into the 
smallest atoms : can I find that heat ? And 
the light; why can't I see it in this, now? 

^' Where was it, and the heat, hidden ? And 
why, and how, did the friction bring them out, 
so that I could feel and see them ? 

^^I donH understand; and (you say) ^I can't 
believe it unless I do understand it.^ 

" I wish you would explain it to me. I don't 
mean, tell me about the ' carbon in the match 
uniting with the oxygen of the air,' &c. I don't 
want mere words, mere names, for some cause 
which somebody guessed at after watching the 
effect. 

" I mean, make all the ^ how's' and ^ why's' 
perfectly plain to me." 

" No; I cannot. Nobody in the world can do 
that." 

" Well, then, if you cannot perfectly under- 
stand so apparently simple and trifling a thing 

158 



can't undekstand the bible. 19 

as the lighting of a match, how can you lender- 
stand God? 

" Can vou tell me how I do this ?" I said, 
picking up a book, and turning it around in my 
hand. 

'^ "Well, you willed to do it ; and your will 
sent out a nervous fluid along the muscles, and 
caused them to contract, and relax, so that you 
could move your hand/^ 

" What do you mean by my ' wilF ? Where 
is it ? And what is it like ? And this ' nervous 
fluid,' — no one has ever seen it. I do not un- 
derstand. I wish you would explain.^^ 

^' No. No one can explain that/^ 

" Can you tell me how I see you now? And 
why I could not see you if I were dead ? I 
don't mean, tell me about ^rays of light;' 
because they have no effect on the eyes of the 
blind, or the dead. 

^* I don't mean, tell me about the ' optic nerve,' 
and the ' retina ;' because they are only the in- 
struments of vision, and might be there and I 
still not see you ; but behind them^ — how is your 
image pictured on my brain ?" 

14* 159 



20 CAN^T UNDERSTAND THE BIBLE. 

" I don't know.'' 

" Can you tell me how I can take thoughts 
out of my mind, now, and put them mto yours? 

" Or how I can glance my eye along this 
page, and take into my mind the same thoughts 
that were in the mind of a man (Baxter) who 
has been dead nearly two hundred years ? Do 
you believe that I can do so ?" 

^^Yes." 

" Do you understand it ?" 

" No.'^ 

" How do you think, at all? Do you under- 
stand how you do so ?'^ 

"^O) I don't." 

^^ Do you believe that you do think ?" 

^^Yes. I know it." 

^^For your dinner, to-day, you ate different 
kinds of food, which will be converted into 
blood. 

^^Can you tell me how, from that same blood, 
will be formed the bones, muscles, brain, hair, 
and nails, of your body? substances so unlike, 
and yet formed from tlie same thing? 

I don't mean, to tell me all those long 



160 



can't understand the bible. 21 

names (mere words) that physiologists give us ; 
but just how that change takes place, — and 

" No ; I can't. No one in the world can do 
that.'' 

" Well, then, if you cannot understand your- 
self, how can you understand your Creator ? 

'' Can you tell me how the corn and the grass 
grow ? Or, how the same grass turns to hair 
on the horse, and feathers on the birds ? Or, 
why the sun's rays warm me, and the north 
wind niakes me cold? Tell me the how, 
and why. I don't understand, and (you say) 
^I can't believe it unless I do understand 
it.'" 

" No one in the world can perfectly under- 
stand, or explain, such things." 

" Well, then, if you cannot perfectly under- 
stand even the simplest operations of nature, 
going on around you, how can you understand 
nature^ s God? 

'' You have studied algebra, friend ?" I 
asked, after a few moments' silence, as he still 
did not answer. 

161 



22 can't understand the bible. 

"Oh, yes/' 

" I wish that you would watch me, while I 
work out a little problem on this slip of paper, 
and see if I reason correctly. 

" We will take any two unknown quantities, 
— say X and a : then 
" Let a; = a. 

" Then, by multiplying by Xj x^ will be equal 
to ax. By subtracting a^, oi? - — o? =^ ax — a^. 
By dividing by ( x — a), ct' + a = a. By col- 
lecting, and substituting the value of x, we have 
2 a = a And, by dividing by a, 2 = 1. 
"Or, Let ^2^ a. 

Then a? = ax. 
And o(? — a^ =^ax — a^. 
And x -{- a='ay 
And 2 a = a. 
And 2 = 1.* 
" Have I reasoned correctly f^ 

"Yes, I think so; but '' 

"But 2 does not equal 1. You know that. 
And yet it is said that ^figures cannot lie.' 
Where is the difficulty?" 

'^ Haines. 
162 



can't understand the bible. 23 

He could not tell. 

^' If that proverb be true, then it must be 
because we have introduced an infinite factor 
into the problem, and our human reason, being 
incapable of judging of infinity, is led to an 
absurd and untrue conclusion. 

'' Now, if in any thing so material as mathe- 
matics, the boasted science of cavillers and infi- 
dels and Unitarians (many of the last-named, you 
know, reject the doctrine of the Trinity, on the 
ground that ^ for one to be three, and three one, 
is a mathematical absurdity ;' and yet we have 
just proved, by mathematical rules, that two 
equals one), — if even in this, when we attempt 
to comprehend and reason on the infinite, we 
are immediately led to an absurd and untrue 
conclusion, how much more are we liable to 
err when we take infinity as a factor in 
mind ! 

'^ How much less are we capable of reasoning 
on, and understanding, the Infinite God ! And 
how unwise in us to cavil at, or reject, any truth 
revealed by that Infinite Mind, on the plea that 
we do not understand it ! 

163 



24 can't understand the bible. 

"And that is just what you are trying to do, 
friend. You are trying to comprehend the In- 
comprehensible. 

"You are trying, with your finite mind, to 
reason out and understand the Infinite God ; 
and you never can do that, if you should learn 
more and more about Him, and grow more and 
more capable of understanding Him, through a 
long eternity. 

"Because, ^If we could understand perfec- 
tion, we were then perfection's equal. And man 
would refuse to worship a God that he could 
fully comprehend.' 

" Now, the very fact that you cannot under- 
stand all of the Bible is only another proof that 
a Superior Being wrote it. 

"You could easily understand what I would 
write ; because my mind is of no higher order 
than your own. 

" You could study out the productions of the 
greatest human minds that have ever lived ; be- 
cause they belonged to no higher order of intel- 
ligence than yourself. 

" But new circumstances will still bring new 

164 



can't undeestand the bible. 25 

power and beauty out of even the simplest 
parts of GocVs Word^ even although you should 
study them until your gray hairs should sink 
into the grave. 

^^You do not need to understand all of the 
Bible. The parts that you are perplexing your- 
self about are only those in which God gives 
us some glimpses of Himself, His method of 
government^ His purposes. His attributes; 
things with which we have nothing to do, ex- 
cept as they affect us personally; and whenever 
they do that, God makes our duty so plain ' that 
he may run that readeth it/^ and Hhe way- 
faring men, though fools, shall not err therein.' ^ 

" For instance : the question for you and me, 
to-day, friend, is not, 'How did sin come into 
the world ?' and ' Why did God permit it V but, 
' Sin is in the world, — that I see ; I am a sinner, 
that I hnow. I am conscious that I sin, volun- 
tarily, every day of my life, whether God fore- 
ordained me to do so or not. How am I, a 
sinner, to be saved ?' 

"And the answer is, ' Christ Jesus came into 

1 Hab. 2:2. 2 ig^. 35 : g. 

165 



26 can't understand the bible. 

the world to save sinners/^ ^Believe on the 
Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved/ ^ 
That is all that we need to know on this sub- 
ject. 

"You are not consistent.^' (The caviller at 
God's word never is.) 

" You ate your dinner, to-day, without asking 
whether God had foreordained you to do so or 
not. 

"You ate it, as a means of satisfying your 
hunger and nourishing your body; and you be- 
lieved that it would do so, although you did 
not, and could not, understand how and why it 
does so, any more than you can understand 
how sin came into the world, and why God per- 
mitted it. 

" The trouble and the ' fog,' friend, are not in 
the Bible, but in your own mind. 

" God has given you some glimpses of your 
heart, by His Spirit, and troubled you by what 
you saw there. And so, in order to justify 
yourself, you are trying to throw the blame 
upon God. 

1 1 Tim. 1 : 15. 2 ^cts 16 : 31. 

166 



can't understand the bible. 27 

" You say to yourself, ' If He foreordained me 
to sin, then He ought not to hold me. account- 
able for sinning/ 

^^^He has so constituted me that I cannot 
believe any thing unless I understand it ; then 
it is not right in Him to hold me accountable 
for not believing His own word/ 

^^ You may really think yourself to be honest 
in your doubts ; but that is only a deception of 
your own heart; and it springs from the simple 
fact that Hhe natural heart is enmity against 
God/ and ^is not subject to the law of God, 
neither indeed can be/ ^ until it is regenerated 
and renewed by His Spirit. 

^^That is what you need first First be re- 
conciled to God^ through His Son, and then 
you will be reconciled to His Word and every 
thing you may find in it,^ and God will give 
you His Spirit to help you to understand much 
that you never can understand without it.^ ' If 
any man will do His will,' Christ promises, ^ he 
shall know of the doctrine.'^ Will you not 



1 Kom. 8 : 7. 


2 2 Cor. 5 : 20. 


3 Col. 1 : 20. 


* 2 Cor. 3 : 14-18. 


s John 7 : 17. 


John 8 : 43. 




15 


167 



28 can't understand the bible. 

seek that Spirit to hclj) you to do God's will by- 
giving yourself up to the Saviour now? To 
believe on the Lord Jesus^ and learn of Him^ 
all that it is needful for you to know?''^ 
''Yes : with God's help, I will try." 
I selected and gave him some books suited to 
his cast of mind and present condition; and a 
few weeks afterwards he sent me back a large 
one, which I had only loaned to him, and en- 
closed a note in it, telling me that '' he hoped he 
had found the Saviour; that he could now 
trust God for all that he could not understand, 
and that he hoped God would help him to grow 
in the knowledge of the truth, and in grace, and 
to be faithful even to the end." 

His regiment was on duty in the city for 
months afterwards, and I saw him frequently 
in the rooms ; and, from all that I could see or 
learn, I had no reason to doubt that he was 
indeed — what, before he left the city, he pub- 
licly professed to be — a Christian. 

1 Matt. 11 : 29. ^ pgaim 32 : 8. 

168 



THE 



STANDARD OF EIGHT. 



THE STANDARD OF RIGHT. 



"How do you reason out that God^s law is 
the ^ standard^ of right f^ asked one, after a con- 
versation somewhat similar to that in the pre- 
ceding sketch. 

"Well^ I will tell you the process. It is 
something like this : — 

" ^ Eight^ and ^ wrong' are only relative terms, 
such as 4ight' and ^darkness/ ^heat' and ^cold,' 
&c. &c. 

" Wrong is the absence of right, just as dark- 
ness is the absence of light, cold the absence of 
heat, &c. 

" But, in order to make this apparent to us, 
we must have some standard by which to judge 
them. For illustration : White and black are 
not really ^relative,' because, although white is 

3 1^* 171 



4 THE STANDARD OF RIGHT. 

the absence of all colour, black is the union of 
all ; but we will take ^ white' for an example, 
because it is most convenient now. 

"We will take snow as the ^standard' of 
white. Now, that wall is not ^ white/ but it is 
nearly so : something in the substance gives out 
yellow rays. I place this sheet of paper beside 
it. That is a little nearer to the ^standard' I 
have in my mind ; but it sends out a few blue 
rays still. I place this piece of linen beside 
them both. You see the difference? Some- 
thing has been applied to the linen to destroy 
every particle of colouring matter in it, and it 
only comes up to my ^ standard,^ — a pure or 
^ snowy' white. 

"Now, I suppose that there is no night so 
dark that some particles of light are not abroad 
in it, no substance so cold that it does not 
contain some heat; but we will take the sun 
(the Bible-standard of earthly light) as the 
^ standard' of light. 

"The farther it (the sun) recedes from the 
meridian, the earth, where we stand, receives 
its rays more obliquely, and fewer of them, 

172 



THE STANDARD OF RIGHT. 5 

until the last one disappearing brings darkness, 
or night. 

"We judge of heat and cold by the tempera- 
ture of our bodies. As it is greater than that, 
we call it warm or hot; as it is less, we call it 
cold, &c. 

"Now, I argue to myself, — as ^ right' and 
^ wrong' are only relative terms, in order to 
make them apparent to us we must have some 
^ standard' by which to judge them ; and that 
standard must be as perfect as possible, because 
it is the test by which the smallest minutiae of 
my thoughts and words and actions are to be 
judged. 

" It must be an invariable standard, or it 
might change without my knowing it, and, so, 
the eternal interests of my soul be put in peril, 
without my knowledge. 

" It must emanate from a Supreme Power, or 
else it might be affected by that which is greater 
than itself, and, so, varied. 

" Now, moral standards are not apparent to 
our senses, — cannot be found in the physical 
world, like the material ones we have spoken of. 

173 



6 THE STANDARD OF RIGHT. ^ 

I must search for the standard of right in the 
regions of mind. 

" I look into my own mind. I find that I 
judge of right and wrong there, by some stand- 
ard which was not in my mind when I can 
first remember of thinking about these things. 
I can remember, when I was a child, of being 
taught what was right and what was wrong; 
and I find that my opinions still change, some- 
times, by sufficient proofs that I have set up a 
false standard. 

^^Well, then, I say, the true standard does 
not originate in my mind, — was not born with 
me. It has to be instilled into my mind from 
some other source. 

^^I glance around among my neighbours. 
I find that if I take away that fixed standard, 
whatever it is, that, what one thinks is right, 
another thinks is wrong, — what one thinks is 
wrong, another thinks is right, — perhaps I 
should get as many different opinions of the 
same thing as the number of persons I apply to. 

^^Well, then, I say, that true standard is not 
in the opinions of men. You cannot say, ^ what- 

174 



THE STANDAKD OF RIGHT. 7 

ever a man believes to be right is right;' be- 
cause he might shut his eyes, or place himself 
where the sun's rays could not reach him, and 
really believe that the sun was not shining; 
but it would still be shining all the same. His 
belief could not blot out a single ray. 

"And, persons have firmly believed things, 
sometimes, which they afterwards plainly dis- 
covered had not one particle of truth in them. 

"And, besides, as the standard of right is to 
be the test of my thoughts, no man living has 
the right or the power to know those thoughts, 
or regulate or judge them for me. 

"Is it in their consciences? No; because I 
find that the conscience needs to be regulated 
by it, in order to be a proper judge. 

" The Thugs of India go with their con- 
science when they make murder a business, by 
which they gain their daily bread ; and they 
train up their children in it, as to a lawful 
trade. 

" The heathen mother's conscience approves, 
when she murders her child. 

"I have talked with those who had been 

175 



8 THE STANDARD OF RIGHT. 

heathens, without a ray of gospel-light, until 
after they were old enough to remember how a 
heathen felt in regard to these things, and I 
found that they had no fixed standard of right. 
Their ideas of right and wrong had been very 
vague and dim indeed, — perhaps no more than 
faint lingerings of the moral sense implanted 
in man at his creation, or faint glimmerings of 
the truth handed down, by tradition, from age 
to age, — that imperfect law by which the 
heathen are to be judged.^ They only had 
enough conscience to show, ' like the existence 
of a regulator in a disordered watch,' that there 
was some standard with which their lives should 
harmonize. 

"And, besides, you know that men, even in 
Christian countries, after they have received a 
knowledge of right, can have a conscience so 
seared by sin, as scarcely to make itself felt 
when they do wrong. 

"No. The conscience might have been a 
safe guide before the fall ; but now it is a very 
perverted and variable conscience, indeed, and 

1 Rom. 2 : 12-18. 
176 



THE STANDARD OF EIGHT. 9 

needs to be purified and regulated and cultivated 
by something outside of itself. I cannot find 
any sure standard of right there. 

" Is it in earthly laws ? I find that different 
nations have different laws about the same 
thing. And I find that the same nation 
changes its laws^ sometimes. For instance^ — 
stealings and other minor offences^ used to be 
punished with death, once^ by nations that only 
punish them with imprisonment or fine or ban- 
ishment now. And, besides, I find that nations 
themselves change. Many that once existed 
have passed away, and their law^s with them. 
New ones (our own, for example) have sprung 
up, and new laws been formed. And, besides, 
I find that all Christian nations model their 
laws after some standard outside of them- 
selves. So, I cannot find that fixed standard 
in them. 

" Then, I cannot find it on earth. 

^^ I glance around and above me. I see 
change and imperfection written on every thing 
I see. And, as that which is created cannot be 
perfect (except in a relative sense), neither 

177 



10 THE STANDARD OF RIGHT. 

can it originate the perfect, or the changeable 
originate the unchangeable. I cannot rest here. 

^^And, so, I climb up, step by step, until I 
reach the Supreme, perfect, unchangeable God, 
— Himself the Truth, — the only one who has 
the right, as well as the power, to set up a 
' standard^ for the lives of all His creatures. 

^^ If I stop short of that, I stop in a fog. 
Reason doAvn from that, and I can take the 
^tangles' out of many a ^knotty point,^ the 
' ends' of which I cannot find to unravel, if I 
search lower. 

^^ If I go farther than that, I am lost in 
misty speculations, which, if carried out far 
enough, and persevered in long enough, will 
inevitably lead me into blind, blank atheism. 

^^ So far, my reason approves. Then I have 
another test, — revelation; and so I take my 
theory, and measure it by the Bible. If it 
agrees with that measure, then I have two 
proofs, reason and revelation (and they are all 
the tests that I need), that my theory is correct. 

" But I must go to work there, honestly. I 
must not ' whittle down' the Bible to suit my 

178 



THE STA]S^DARD OF RIGHT. 11 

theory, neither (if the Bible is too short) must 
I stretch it. But, as the Bible is the only sure 
^measure' I can have, I must make my Hheory' 
to suit it. 

"I throw away all sectarian teachings and 
^ philosophies' of men, and take the Bible only. 

" I find there that God is spoken of in an 
absolute sense, as ' The Highest,' and the ^ Most 
High,' about forty times. I cannot find there 
the least trace of any principle or power higher 
than He, to which He must conform. (For, to 
speak of an abstract ^principle,' unassociated 
with the idea of power, and yet which compels, 
is simply an absurdity.) 

"I read there ^ that ^He doeth according to 
His will in the army of heaven, and among the 
inhabitants of the earth, and none can stay His 
hand, or say unto Him, What doest thou?' 
^Our God is in the heavens. He hath done 
whatsoever he pleased.' ^ ' Whatever He pleased, 
that did He in heaven and in earth, and in all 
deep places,' &c. &c.^ 

1 Daniel 4 : 35. ^ ps^im 115 : 3. 

3 Psalm 135 : 6. Isa. 46 : 19. Dent. 4 : 39. 
16 179 



12 THE STANDARD OF RIGHT. 

^^ I find that He alone i& absolutely perfect ;^ 
that with Him alone ^ there is ^no variableness, 
neither shadow of turning/ ' I am the Lord/ 
He says : ^ ^ I change not.' 

"Now, this would be enough to make me 
stop my search ; but I must not take a few 
verses and string them together to prove any 
thing that is inconsistent with the rest of the 
teachings of the Bible. You could prove almost 
any thing by that method. But, — 

" I keep hold of my verses, and go prayer- 
fully from Genesis to Revelation, and I find 
that they agree perfectly with the general tenor 
of all that God has revealed to us of Himself: 
and so I conclude that I have found what I was 
seeking, — the Truth, — the Supreme, unchange- 
able, perfect, uncontrolled Euler, or ' God.' His 
will consistent with His nature, with all His 
attributes, and with itself in all its volitions. 
Not from necessity (God knows no necessity: 
' Must' can never be applied to Him), but be- 
cause He is perfect God ; and whatever He is, 
is perfection. And in that will exists the true, 

1 Luke 18 : 19. ^ j^mes 1 : 17. ^ Mai. 3 : 6. 
180 



THE STANDARD OF RIGHT. 13 

fixed ^ standard^ of right by which I am to be 
judged. 

" When we reach that stand-pointy we have 
a firm foothold. We were only floating in un- 
certainties before. 

"Strike that ^key-note/ and all around you 
is harmony. Tune your faith by any other, 
and you have only uncertain sounds and discord. 

"Now^ God^s will exists in His own mind, 
just as your will exists in your mind. I have 
no right to know what exists in your will at 
this moment, or at any moment, except as its 
purposes affect myself. Much less have I any 
right to know what exists in the will of God, 
except as its purposes concern me. 

" I have no real right to know that, either, 
only that the idea of justice which I have formed 
from another of His attributes which He has re- 
vealed to me — His justice — leads me to expect 
that as He has given me the liberty of choice 
(the gift of His will), and help to choose aright, 
and so holds me an accountable being, He will 
make known to my mind what is His will con- 
cerning me.'^ 

181 



14 THE STANDAKD OF RIGHT. 

"You say, Hhe idea of justice which I have 
formed from another of His attributes which 
He has revealed to me, — i.e. His justice.' I do 
not understand.'' 

" Well, I mean simply this : — 

" Whatever idea, or sense of justice, God 
gave man at his creation (because he was to 
live with others of his species who had equal 
rights with himself; and because he was to 
have dominion over the brute creation), he re- 
ceived directly from God, and it harmonized 
with, or was in the likeness of, God's own jus- 
tice. He had no other idea or sense of justice 
than what he thus received. 

"What man's idea of justice would have 
been now, had all communication from heaven 
ceased at the fall, we can only imagine. We 
can judge a little by the idea of it which exists 
among the heathen now, even with the glimmer- 
ings from some source outside of themselves 
(perhaps), which may be in their minds still. 
It is like their sense of right and wrong,- — very 
vague and dim indeed, w^ithout any fixed stand- 
ard by which to regulate their lives. 

182 



THE STANDARD OF RIGHT, 15 

^^And you know, too, that even nominally 
Christian countries need to protect the rights of 
individuals by stringent laws; and even the 
severe penalties affixed to some of those laws are 
not strong enough to prevent injustice from man 
to man; while his injustice to the lower animals 
is demonstrated before our eyes every day. 

" I might go through nearly the same pro- 
cess of reasoning we have been using, to show 
that we have received our ideas of justice only 
from what God has revealed to us of Himself, 
and what we have received from Him; and 
that the more our lives are in harmony with 
His will, — ^AU things whatsoever ye would 
that men should do to you, do ye even so to 
them,^^ — the nearer we approach the only true 
standard of justice. 

^' We see enough to convince us that men now 
naturally love themselves best, and would like to 
appropriate to themselves all that they think is 
good. Only from God could come the standard, 
^ Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.^ ^ 

1 Matt. 7 : 12. Luke 6 : 31. 

2 Matt. 22 : 39. Mark 12 : 31. Luke 10 : 27. 

16'* 183 



\ 



16 THE STANDARD OF RIGHT. 

^^ So, we might go through nearly the same 
process, to show that^ Hhere is none good but 
One, that is God/ and that all our true ideas 
of goodness have their source in Him ; to 
show that we have no correct idea of per- 
fection, except what God has revealed to us of 
Himself; and that the nearer our lives are in 
harmony with His will, in harmony with God, 
so to speak, — the nearer we approach to the 
standard made manifest to us in the earthly 
life of God in Christ, — the nearer we approach 
to being ^ perfect, even as our Father which is 
in heaven is perfect/^ 

'' So, we can find the ' standard of truth' only 
in God. And so we can trace our true ideas, 
or sense of all that is good, and true, and per- 
fect, up to the same great Source and Author.^ 
Is that plain f 

^as it true?'' 
" I think so." 

1 Matt. 19 : 17. 

2 Matt. 5 : 48. 

3 John 3 : 27. 1 Cor. 4 : 7. James 1 : 17. 
184 



THE STANDARD OF RIGHT. 17 

" Now, there must be some medium of com- 
munication between mind and mind. 

^^ You use words to convey your will to me : 
so the laio of God, as it is now revealed to us 
in the Bible, is God^s will put into words, — such 
words as will best convey that will to our finite 
minds ; and in that will, as thus expressed to 
us, we have our only true ' Standard of Right.^ ^^ 

185 



THE 



CAVILLER AT PRAYER. 



THE CAVILLER AT PRAYER. 



^^ It would do no good for me to pray/' said 
a caviller at God's word, one day, when I was 
urging him to pray. ^^ God would not listen to 
me ; because the Bible says that ' the prayer of 
the wicked is an abomination to the Lord/ '' 

" Where does the Bible say that, friend ? I 
have never seen it.'' 

"Well, I can't tell just the chapter and 
verse; but I am almost certain that I have 
read it somewhere." 

"It says in the Bible ^ that the ^sacriiSce of 
the wicked is an abomination to the Lord' (or 
an hypocrisy) when he offers sacrifice for sin, 
and, at the same time, does not intend to give 
up his sins. And it says, in another place, that^ 

1 Prov. 15 : 8. 2 p^oy. 28 : 9. 

3 1S9 



4 THE CAVILLER 

^he that turneth away from hearing the law, even 
his prayer shall be abomination/ — or, hateful to 
God, — or, sin. 

" For instance : you wish to go into a man's 
house, by night, and rob him ; and you pray to 
God to make him sleep soundly, and so give you 
the opportunity to do so. Such a prayer would 
be an ^abomination,' because you turn away 
from the law, ^Thou shalt not steal.' God 
says,^ ^Ye ask, and ye receive not, because ye 
ask amiss, that ye may consume it upon your 
lusts;' because^ ^If I regard iniquity in my 
heart, the Lord will not hear me.' 

" Or you pray, ^ Forgive us our debts, as 
we forgive our debtors,' and at the same time 
you cherish an unforgiving or revengeful spirit 
towards any one who has wronged you. Such 
a prayer would be asking God oiot to forgive 
you ; because He says,^ ' If ye forgive not men 
their trespasses, neither will your Father for- 
give your trespasses.' 

" So, the swearer prays, when he swears, — 
whether he means it, or not; but you know 

1 James 4:3, '^ Psalm QQ : 18. ^ ^att. "y : 15. 

190 



AT PEAYER. 5 

what dreadful things, what ^ abominations/ he 
asks of God, at the same time that he treats 
the great and holy God with disrespect, and 
turns away from the law/ ^Thou shalt not 
take the name of thy Lord thy God in vain/ 

"Those are all the passages that I can re- 
member now, where it says any thing like that ; 
and you have picked them out from among a great 
many passages, where God commands sinners to 
pray to Him ; and from among a great many 
promises that, if they ask aright, their prayers 
shall be heard and answered ; and from among 
a great many instances where He shoivs you 
that He has heard and answered the prayers of 
sinners; because,- if you look closely into your 
own heart, you will find that you really do not 
want to pray, at all. God has touched your 
heart by His Spirit, and made you feel that you 
need to pray to Him, and ought to do it ; and 
when you remember how you have been treating 
Him all these years, you shrink from speaking 
to Him ; you do not want to bring yourself into 
His presence. 

1 Ex. 20 : 7. 

17 191 



b THE CAVILLER 

" And^ besideSj somebody says, ' Praying' 
(real prayer) ' will make a man leave ofF sinning, 
or sinning will make a man leave off praying ;' 
and you do not want to give up your sins, and 
yet the thought of them troubles you, sometimes ; 
and so you try to excuse yourself for clinging 
to them, by throwing the blame on God^s word. 
You say, ' The fault is not Avith me, but w^ith 
God ; because He has said that if I should pray 
to Him, He would not listen to me/ But you 
cannot hold up such excuses, to cover your sins 
from His sight ; neither can you plead them at 
the bar of His justice, w^ien you know that He 
has said to you, as to all, when they pray for 
things agreeable to His wdll,^ ^ Ask, and it shall 
be given you. Seek, and ye shall find. Knock, 
and it shall be opened unto you.^ ^^ 



^^But,'' said another caviler at God, ^^if God 
is unchangeable, what is the use of prayer?^' 

"' God does not change, but our impressions 
and experiences of Him do. 



1 Luke 11 : 9. Matt. 7 : 7. 
'l92 



AT PRAYER. 7 

^^ For illustration : You remember that^ once, 
it was considered a certainty that the earth was 
immovable in space, and that the sun, moon, 
and stars revolved around it. Men thouglit 
that they had the evidences of their senses for 
tliis ; and the first one who advanced a different 
theory was threatened with death. 

" But it was afterwards proved, with as much 
certainty as such things can be proved, that the 
sun is immovable in the heavens (or nearly 
so, as far as this earth is concerned), and that 
the cause of its apparent motion is our own 
change of position in regard to it. It is the 
earth that moves, instead of the sun. 

" We see something like this, when we are 
travelling rapidly, and stationary objects appear 
to our vision to be moving swiftly past us, even 
while we know that they have not moved at all, 
only, we have changed our position in regard to 
them ; or, as when distant objects appear to 
grow larger as we approach them ; or, as when 
travelling through a hilly country the landscape 
appears to us to enlarge or contract, or new 
views aj)pear to be momentarily spreading them- 

193 



8 THE CAVILLER 

selves out before our eyes ; while all the tune 
they remain as before we came^ — would have 
been the same had we never seen them at all. 
The cause of their apparent change and motion 
was in us, — not in them. 

^' So, when God appears to our miuds to have 
been moved by our prayers, it is, in reality, we 
ourselves who have moved our positions towards 
God. We have received new impressions of 
Him, new views of Him, and new accessions 
to our experience of Him, only. The gifts, or 
good, we asked of Him, were in His power, and 
His purpose towards us, from all eternity ; only, 
until we felt the need of them, until we prayed, 
we were not in the position towards God which 
we need to take before His gifts can reach us 
as blessings. 

" For illustration : You sit shivering under a 
thick shade, while the sun is shining brightly 
all around it. A friend comes to you, and 
says, ^The sun's rays will warm you, if you 
choose.' 

" ^ But,' you answer, ^ I have been taught 
that the sun is fixed in the heavens. It is no 

194 



AT PRAYER. 9 

use trying to have it move so that its rays can 
reach me here.' 

"^But/ your friend says, ^you are to come out 
from under the shade, and stand where the sun's 
rays will fall upon you.' 

"^But/ you still object, ^I am so benumbed 
with the cold that I cannot move myself.' 

^^And the answer is, ^ I am sent by one who 
loves you, and is not willing that you should 
perish, to help you. I can do it; and I will do 
it, if you choose.' 

'^ Then, if you really feel your need of heat, and 
really desire it, you move out, with his help, into 
the sunshine, and receive warmth and strength. 

^^Now, that sun was shining all the time, 
although you could not feel it, as you needed, 
until you changed your position in regard to it. 

" So, God's storehouse is always full of such 
blessings as you need, and God's Spirit is always 
waiting to help you to place yourself w^here they 
will fall upon your head and heart; but you 
are to come out, with the help of the Holy 
Spirit, from under the shadow of your sins, or 
your unbelief, or whatever it is that is between 

17* 195 



10 THE CAVILLER 

you and the blessing; and the promise is, ^It 
shall be given you/ 

" And it is God's will that you should stand 
in that position towards Him, all the time, 
' continuing instant in prayer/ ^ ' Pray without 
ceasing/ He says.^ 

" Now, we know that that does not mean that 
we should keep our bodies bowed in the attitude 
of prayer, all the time ; because He has given 
us a great many other duties, equally binding, 
to perform, which would forbid that (and His 
orders never conflict) ; but we should always 
possess the spirit of prayer, — a constant looking 
up to God as the ' author and giver of every 
good and perfect gift/ As our wants come (and 
they come every moment), looking up to Him 
for their supply. As mercies and blessings 
reach us (and they reach us every moment), 
lifting up our hearts in gratitude to Him who 
sent them ; and, so, keep moving out, with His 
Spirit's help, into the sunshine of His presence, 
continually. We should put ourselves, by the 
help of His Holy Spirit, into the position where 

1 Kom. 12 : 12. 2 1 xhess. 5 : 17. 

196 



AT PEAYER. 11 

) 

His choicest gifts can reach us, as blessings ; and 
the promise is, ^ You shall receive them/ That 
is the only condition on which we can claim 
the promise. 

" For example : God, after telling His people 
Israel what rich blessings, both spiritual and 
temporal. He had in store for them, said,^ 'I 
will yet for this be inquired of^ (or asked) ^by 
the house of Israel, to do it for them/ 

"The gifts were in His power, and His 
purposes towards them, then; but until they 
drew near to God, and sought His blessing, 
they should not receive them. 

" Again : the father of the prodigal son, spoken 
of in the Bible,^ was unchangeably loving and 
pitiful ; the son was changeable and fickle. 

" While the son was starving in a ' far country,^ 
that father's house was filled with plenty ; but 
its abundance could do the son no good, so 
long as he deliberately turned away from it, 
and refused to partake of it, and preferred his 
sins. As soon as he sought his father's face, 
how joyfully the repentant prodigal was received, 

1 Ezek. 36 : 37. ^ Luke 15 : 11-32. 

197 



12 THE CAVILLER AT PRAYER. 

and clothed, and fed, by the same love that would 
have received and blessed him in any hour 
of his wanderings, if he had desired it and 
sought it ! 

^^ So, God is our unchangeably loving Father. 
We are His ^ prodigal sons,' as long as we turn 
away from that love, and wander in sin, and 
refuse His blessings. As soon as we return to 
Him, we are welcomed and blessed by the same 
love which was ready to welcome us at any 
previous moment; and the rich gifts of His 
love are given to us for our asking. 

'^ We, only, change, when we receive good gifts 
from God in answer to our prayers. God's un- 
changing promise to us, always, is, ^ Whatsoever 
ye ask in my name, that will I do.' ' If ye 
shall ask any thing in my name, I will do it.' " ^ 

In the quick-changing, kaleidoscopic life of 
the wards at this period, I only had opportunity 
for the one conversation with either of these 
cavillers at prayer, before they were discharged, 
and passed to their homes, out of the reacli of 
my knowledge. 

1 John 14 : 13, 14. 
198 



THE SUBSTITUTE. 



THE SUBSTITUTE. 



While talking with a sick soldier, in the 
hospital at the transfer depot, one day, I noticed 
two strangers come into the ward. One of them 
lay down on a cot, and presently I went over to 

him. He had belonged to the regiment, he 

told me. His regiment had been discharged 
while he was too sick to travel, and he and his 
comrade had come there, nov\^, on their way 
home. 

" I have been wanting so much to see you 
once more,^^ he said, raising himself up in bed. 

" Why, did you ever see me before ? Where f^ 

" In the hospital at : don^t you remember ? 

I have been thinking so much about what you 
said, that day; and I wanted to see you again, 
to tell you.^^ 

201 



THE SUBSTITUTE. 



a 



What did I say, friend ? I know that it 
was only on the one subject; but I have for- 
gotten the conversation/^ 

^' You remember, I said something about 
^getting ready to die/ and you said that you 
did not believe in ^getting ready to die;' that 
was not the 7nght motive. I ought to ' get ready 
to liveJ That I owed my life, my talents, my 
influence, to God, and it was not right to keep 
them back from Him, or use them against Him. 
That I ought to ^present my body a living 
sacrifice to God,' which was my ' reasonable 
service,' instead of turning to Him at the last 
moment only, so that I could get into heaven." 

'' And did you do as I said, friend ?" 

" Yes : I think I did," he said, earnestly. 

^^Oh, I am so glad! And your soidj friend? 
What did you do with it ? You do not think 
that your present obedience will free it from 
past guilt ?" 

" No : I took it to Jesus, to have Him apply 
the ^ blood of cleansing."' 

" And you think that He did so ? And that 
you are a Christian ?" 

202 



THE SUBSTITUTE. O 

" I hope SO." 

We glanced at some of the evidences we can 
have of our acceptance with God, through His 
Son, — love to God, to His people, to His word, 
hatred of sin, desires after holiness. He had 
many of the ^' family marks," if his heart did 
not deceive him ; and once more he expressed 
his strong desire, in life or in death, to be " only 
the Lord's." 

Presently his comrade came up, and I began 
giving him some of my little tracts. 

" You gave me that before," he said, handing 
me back " The Substitute." 

'' Where did I give it to you ?" 

^^ In the hospital at , when I was sick : 

don't you remember? I have all the little 
books you gave me, in my knapsack, — taking 
them home to the children." 

" You have a ^ Substitute,' have you, friend?" 
I said, as I put the tract back into my satchel. 

'' You know that persons who were ^ drafted' 
for the army could be ^ exempted,' or freed from 
obligation, by their providing a ' substitute' to 
take their place in the dangers of the march, 

. 18 203 



6 THE SUBSTITUTE. 

and the camp, and the battle-field, and perhaps 
of death. 

" Now, there is a last grand draft coming, 
from which no one w^ill be ' exempted ;' which 
you, and I, and all the world, must meet;^ but 
against that day there is a ^substitute' ^provided, 
who has already taken our place, even to the 
death ; and He is offered ^ without money, and 
without price,' ^ to every one who will accept of 
Him; and, in that day, every name w^ill be 
' drawn,' but that of those who have received 
Him, given themselves to Him, and had His 
name 'substituted^ for theirs} ^Deliver' them 
^ from going down to the pit,' says God ; ^ ^ for I 
have found a ransom.' 

"Have you accepted Him as your ^substitute' 
yet, do you think, friend ?" 

"I hope so," he said, earnestly. "I have 
never made a profession of religion, but " 

" You think that you possess it ?" 

" Yes : I do hope so." 

1 Eccl. 12 : 14. Eom. 14 : 12. 

2 Mark 10 : 45. Eph. 1:7. ^ ig^. 55. 

4 Key. 20 : 12-15. ^ j^j^ 33 . 24. 

204 



THE SUBSTITUTE. 7 

Again we glanced at some of the signs of the 
^^ new birth/^ 

^^You have become a Christian, then, you 
trust, since you came into the army ?^' 

^^Yes; since I saw you that time/^ 

" Oh, I am so glad ! — so glad !'^ And then we 
had a little talk about the future in their new 
life, if God should give them a future on earth. 

The supper "calF^ sounded, while we were 
talking, and with an earnest " God bless you,'^ 
as they shook my hand at parting, they went 
down-stairs, — out of my sight, most probably, 
until they "return" again, I trust, among the 
" ransomed of the Lord.'^ ^ 

1 Isa. 35 : 10. 



205 



CONTRASTED DEATHBEDS. 



18* 



CONTRASTED DEATHBEDS, 



If I knew nothing at all about the religion 
of Christ further than what I have seen of its 
influence in the wards of hospitals, I should 
choose to be a Christian for the comfort that it 
gives when all other help is powerless, and for 
the-peace it gives in death. Sometimes the con- 
trast between those who possessed it and those 
who did not, was so strongly presented in the 
same ward, that even the most hardened were 
forced to acknowledge its power. One such con- 
trast, out of very many, comes before me vividly 
at this moment. 

Late one night, one of the nurses in Ward 

came for me to pray with a new-comer, 

who was dying in such terrible mental agony 
that even they, accustomed as they were to 
death-scenes, were frightened. 

209 



4 CONTEASTED DEATH-BEDS. 

He was an emaciated, middle-aged man, with 
such a despairing, horror-stricken face as I do 
not care to see again. I have forgotten the 
words that he uttered; but I can still see plainly 
the startled outlook from his sunken eyes as he 
told me " how wicked he had been, and that his 
soul was lost.^^ 

I held up before him the pitying Saviour 
who pardoned the thief upon the cross. For a 
moment he would seem to be trying to look to 
him ; then he would shrink back, and his teeth 
would chatter and his whole frame tremble as 
if in an ague-fit, as he told me " it was too late ! 
The flames of hell are closing around me already. 
Don't you see them f^ — starting up, and trying 
to fight them back with his hands. " They are 
coming nearer and nearer. I shall soon be in 
them.'' 

Then he would sink back, and his reason, which 
the approach of the king of terrors had frightened 
from its seat, would return for a few moments. 

For more than an hour I sat beside him. 
He would not let me leave him sooner. A few 
hours later, and his cot was empty. 

210 



CONTRASTED DEATH-BEDS. 5 

The dimly-lighted ward, the pale faces from 
the cots around that helped me watch that 
dying man, are photographed upon my memory 
still. 

On the opposite side of the ward, a few beds 
higher up, a young boy lay for months. He 
came to us very ill, and at one time we thought 
he could only live a few days. What a feeling 
of rest would come over me, as I turned from 
the careless or sin-sick hearts around him to 
meet the pure, calm face that always greeted me 
with such a smile of peace ! How I enjoyed 
sitting beside his cot, hearing him talk of Jesus ! 
'' That precious Jesus ! I shall soon see Him, soon 
be where He is. I can hardly waitJ^ And his 
eye would light up with the glad anticipation 
of a child returning home after a long absence, 
as he peers out into the darkness and catches 
the light from the open door in the distance, 
and tries to picture the dear familiar faces that 
watch and wait for him. Then he would take 
his little, well-worn Testament, and turn here 
and there to the stray glimpses of the " golden 
city,^' which our Father has let down to us 

211 



6 CONTRASTED DEATH- BEDS. 

through the rifts of the future, and he would 
help me to put them together, and try to picture 
what kind of a place it was, — try to take from 
this world all we are told is not there, and add 
to it all we are told is in heaven. But, after 
trying to imagine what a pleasant place even 
earth would be then, we felt that we could only 
see "as through a glass darkly^^ the things 
which God has prepared for them that love 
him. " But I shall soon see, soon know/^ he 
would repeat, so joyfully that I could scarcely 
keep back a feeling of envy that he should be 
so near home, while I must wait and work. 

But he, too, must come back a little distance 
to speak some more words for Jesus to those 
around him. 

"You are so much better,^^ I said, one day, 
" perhaps our Father has some work for you to 
do in this world yet.^^ 

"Yes, I am better; and — do you know? — I 
a^n^t glad^^ he said, in such an earnest, child- 
like way, and with such a look of disappoint- 
ment, that it touched me deeply. " I was so 
near home I didn't want to come back again.'' 

212 



CONTRASTED DEATH-BEDS. 7 

He tried to receive this life as from the hands of 
one who loved him; but I am afraid he was only 
too glad to feel it slipping away from him again, 
— scarcely fast enough to please him, though. I 
had to talk to him more than once about patient 
waiting. 

^' What time is it f^ he asked the warden, one 
morning. 

" Eight o'clock.^' 

'^ I think I will be on my way home by one 
o^clock.^^ (He always called heaven '^ liome.^^) 
About that hour I slipped into his ward. "I 
don^t think it is right/*^ he whispered, with a 
wronged look. "I was almost gone, and they 
gave, me stimulants and brought me back, and 
I didn^t want to come.^^ A little more waiting 
and longing, and he went up to that ^^ precious 
Jesus^^ whose name was the last I heard him 
utter. 

Two brothers, a citizen and a soldier, were 
with him nearly from the first. He was the 
youngest and the pet. Earth had much to 
attract him, but after that first near outlook 
into eternity, he scarcely gave a downward 

213 



8 CONTRASTED DEATH-BEDS. 

glance. All interest appeared to be centred in 
"Jesus'^ and ^^leaven.^^ 

Another picture of shade, and light. "No. 
6" was a middle-aged man, who had lain in a 
field-hospital in the poisonous swamps of the 
Yazoo River, until he was wasted to a skeleton, 
— the skin of his face clinging to the bones, dry 
and withered, like parchment. 

He revived a little in the first few days after 
he came to us; and when I talked to him about 
his soul, he told me that he had been a very 
wicked man all his life. 

" But,^^ he said, " I have been thinking about 
these things a good deal lately; and I have 
made up my mind that, if God spares me to 
get home, I am going to turn a new leaf. I 
intend to buy a little farm and settle down, 
and try to live a Christian for the rest of my 
days.'^ 

Again and again we held up before him a 
crucified Redeemer, and urged him to accept of 
that dear Saviour now ; told him how unwise it 
was to delay any longer; and he would tell me, — 

" Yes, I know ; but I am so weak now. You 

214 



CONTRASTED DEATH-BEDS. 9 

see, I have read enough about my own system, 
to know that perfect rest is the best medicine 
I can have ; and I want to keep my mind per- 
fectly free from care, until I get a little stronger; 
and then I will attend to my soul/^ 

One day, when I came up to his cot, he was 
lying asleep ; but I could see, by the look on 
his face, that the end was very near ; and, as 
I stood quietly beside him for a moment, he 
opened his eyes. 

Such a startled, frightened look as was in 
them ! 

"I^m afraid — I'm dying," he gasped. "I'm 
afraid — I will have — to go — '' And his eyes 
turned back in their sockets, even as he spoke. 

I bent close to his ear. 

''Pray, friend, — -jpray. Say, ' God be merciful 
to me, a sinner, and pardon my sins, for Christ's 
sake. Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.' " 

He made a convulsive effort : — 

" God-be-mer " It was too late, — too late ! 

The lower jaw fell, showing the inside of his 
mouth to his throat; and, as I stood there, I 
saw his tongue moving, trying to articulate 

19 215 



10 CONTRASTED DEATH-BEDS. 

the words — until its muscles (about the last to 
die) were palsied to the roots. 

I thought that he was gone ; but in a mo- 
ment a convulsion passed over his face. It was 
more than a nervous twitching of the relaxing 
muscles. I have often seen that on a dying 
face; but this had something of that passing 
soul in it. Such horror and shrinking^ as if, 
even before that soul left this world^ it had 
caught a glimpse of what was before it in the 
next. 

I never recall such a face as that without a 
thrill of pain, even to this day, — without bring- 
ing back something of the feeling with which 
I stood beside such cots, and thought, ^' Oh, if 
those who are waiting for a ^more convenient 
season' to attend to their souls' salvation, could 
only look on tjiis and be warned !'' 

Standing in Ward , some months later, 

talking to ^^No. 12,'^ ^^No. 13'' heard my 
voice (he was lying with his back towards 
me), and turned his face around w^ith a smile 
of welcome. But what a change had come 
over that fair, boyish face in one short week ! 

216 



CONTRASTED DEATH-BEDS. 11 

It startled me. The hectic flush had disap- 
peared, leaving it utterly bloodless, lips and all. 
All the life seemed to be centred in the large 
dark eyes. I saw that he was dying, although, 
as is very often the case in pulmonary diseases, 
his voice and mind were clear and strong as in 
health. 

'^ I want you to write home when I am gone," 
he said, after a little talk about Jesus. " Tell 
them how happy I died. Tell father I am so 
sorry I ran away'' (he had become a Christian 
since he came into the army) ; " but, oh, I am so 
happy now. Tell Charlie and Emma to be 
good, and meet me in heaven. Tell mother'' — 
he stopped at that dear name — ^^You will be 
waiting for her?" "Yes." The words came 
slowly now. " I am going — to Jesus — blessed 
Jesus !'^ 

I was kneeling beside his cot, passing my 
hand lightly over the boyish brow his mother 
had so often kissed. "Can you hear me yet, 
little brother?" I asked, when he was almost over 
the river. " Is Jesus still with you? Can you 
trust* your soul into His hands?" The eyes 

217 



12 CONTRASTED DEATH-BEDS. 

half opened, closed again, and my soldier-boy 
was with his Saviour. 

"I will never forget that death-bed, as long 
as I live/^ said "No. 12/^ after he too, I trust, 
had become a Christian. Neither, I think, will 
it be forgotten by any of the awed group of con- 
valescents who stood around my boy^s bed that 
day. From the most careless heart, I know, 
went up the prayer, " Let me die the death of the 
righteous, and let my last end be like his.^^ 

218 



A LIFE RESTORED. 



19* 



A LIFE RESTORED. 



"A GREAT deal better to-day, I see," I said, 
as I came up to " No. 25," a bright, intelligent- 
looking youth of about eighteen, who had been 
sent to us, with a great many other sick soldiers, 
from one of the lower hospitals a few days 
before. 

"A great deal better," came back to me from 
lip and eye. 

^^And how glad and grateful we should be! 
You have been very ill : did you know it ?" 

^^ Yes. I thought I should die on the boat. 
I did not think I could live to get here." 

" But now God is giving you your life back 
again, I trust. He gave it to you at first, you 
know. He very nearly took it from you in the 
past few weeks ; and now that He is giving it 

3 221 



4 A LIFE RESTORED. 

to you again a free gift, what are you going to 
do with it ? Perhaps you have already conse- 
crated it to His service, and are one of God^s 
children?'^ 

" No," he answered ; '^ I am afraid not. My 
father and mother were Christians, and taught 
me to read the Bible and pray when I was a 
child ; and I used to think a good deal about 
those things sometimes when I was at home. 
But after I went into the army, — you know we 
have so many other things to think of, and so 
many temptations to draw our minds away, — it 
seemed almost impossible to attend to these 
things there." 

^' Suppose you had been killed in battle, or 
had died on the boat : do you think God would 
have accepted such an excuse as that at the last 
day?" 

" No : I know He would not." Then, after 
a minute's silence, he added, "I have been think- 
ing a great deal lately, and reading my Bible 
every day that I was able; but there are so 
many things in it I do not understand." 

" You do not need to understand every thing 

222 



A LIFE RESTORED. O 

in the Bible : what you need is to find the way 
of salvation in Christ/^ I said, seating myself 
on a vacant bed beside him. '' What would 
you think of a farmer who refused to plant his 
corn because he could not understand how the 
same grain should send out two sprouts, — one 
of which, called the root, should shoot out long 
thread-like stems through the ground, fasten 
itself firmly, and suck up nourishment for the 
plant, and the other should creep up through 
the ground, and spread out into a strong stalk 
and leaves and ears? Suppose he should fold 
his arms and say, ^ I won't plant a single grain 
until I can understand all about it.' Don't you 
think he would deserve to starve ? God doesn't 
ask him to understand what He Himself only 
knows. The farmer is to plant the corn, keep 
the weeds from it, hoe round it, watch it, and 
pray for a blessing. That is his duty; God will 
take care of the rest. 

'^ Do you understand hoio you did that ?" I 
said, as he reached for the cup at the head of his 
bed, and took a drink. " Suppose you had said 
just now, ' I won't take a drop of water until I 

223 



6 A LIFE RESTOPvED. 

can understand just how I am able to move 
my arm so that I can get it.' Don't you 
think you would deserve to be thirsty? And 
if you cannot understand yourself, or even tell 
me why the grass is green or the sky blue, do 
you think you can understand the great Maker 
of all, or all the reasons for His actions ? The 
fact that w^e cannot understand some passages 
of the Bible, is only another proof that a supe- 
rior Being wrote it. And you can never fully 
understand God, although you should go on 
learning more and more about Him for a long 
eternity; but the plan of salvation — all you 
need to know — is written so plainly that ' he 
may run that readeth it;' and ^the wayfaring 
men, though fools, shall not err therein.' " 

He lay quietly a few minutes, as if in thought, 
and then said, ^^Another thing I cannot account 
for. I have seen men who professed to be 
Christians on Sunday, and yet they would swear 
and drink and cheat on week-days, just as bad 
as any one. I have lived beside such people 
and never saw them read their Bible, or pray, 
and they never spoke a word to me about my 

224 



A LIFE RESTORED. 7 

soul. And, besides that, I have seen men whom 
I have heard pray in public and make loud 
professions when they were at home, and whom 
everybody thought to be really Christians ; but 
after they had been in the army a while, they 
would swear and drink as bad as any one. 
Sometimes, when I saw them, it almost made 
me believe there was no such thing as religion.^^ 

^^Did you ever see a counterfeit bank-note ?^^ 
I asked. 

"Yes,— often.^' 

" That was always drawn on a real bank, and 
at a little distance looked like a good note: 
didn^t it ? And sometimes it looked so much 
like the true one, that you perhaps have been 
cheated yourself, and it passed for genuine until 
it came to some one who had a Detector. But, 
even if you had never seen a note on that bank 
before, seeing the counterfeit would make you 
think there was a true bank of that name and 
true notes in. circulation somewhere: wouldn^t 
it? Men do not counterfeit notes on a bank 
that does not exist: do they?'^ 

" No,^^ he replied. 

. 225 



8 A LIFE TvESTORED. 

"Just so counterfeit Christians only prove 
that there is true religion, and that there are 
true Christians somewhere. The men you refer 
to were counterfeits. Christ Himself says, ' Many 
will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we 
not prophesied in thy name ? Then will I pro- 
fess unto them, I never knew you.^ I am afraid 
you are trying to hide behind some of those 
counterfeits, and think you are not so bad as 
they, because you do not profess to be a Chris- 
tian. But you cannot hide behind them in the 
judgment; for the Judge Himself has told you, 
^ Every one of us shall give account of himself 
unto God;^ and He will not listen to such ex- 
cuses there.^^ 

"Yes; that is all true,^^ he said ; " but then I 
can't feel that I have been such a great sinner 
as some say everybody is. My parents never 
allowed me to lie, or steal, or swear: and I 
have always attended church whenever I could. 
I cannot feel that I have been so very wicked.'^ 

" Let us see what the Saviour says,'' I said, 
taking up his Testament and turning to Matt. 
22 : 37-40: "Thou shalt love the Lord thy God 

220 



A LIFE restorp:d. 9 

with all thy heart/ &c. Have you obeyed 
the first commandment, or the second either? 
Ask your own heart, and then read the rest of 
God's law, and measure your life by it, and see 
how far short it comes. Remember, too, that a 
sinful thought is as much a sin in God's sight 
as a sinful word or action. How many thoughts 
have passed through your mind to-day that you 
would be afraid or ashamed to have even this 
poor, sick soldier beside you know! and yet 
every thought of your life is written down in 
God's ^book of remembrance.' Don't you think 
that He and you too will read enough there on 
the last day to make you feel that a sentence of 
eternal death would be no more than just? 
You say you do not swear ; but how many times 
have you stood quietly by and heard God's 
name, and even the name of that dear Saviour 
who died for you, taken in vain, and even 
smiled at it, for fear they would think you were 
His friend! You were ashamed to own that 
you even respected Him. And He has said, 
^Whosoever is ashamed of me before men, of 
him will I also be ashamed before my Father 

20 227 



10 A LIFE HESTORED. 

and His holy angels/ The Lord of glory took 
the form of man, and died as a sacrifice, to atone 
for your sins. He offers you His friendship 
and salvation, — blessings without which you are 
undone forever. To refuse to heed Him who 
calls to you so graciously from heaven, would 
seem to be the greatest sin a man can com- 
mit. But have not you neglected Him as much 
as if there were no heaven, no hell, no Saviour? 
And don't you think the only wonder is that 
the Judge still has patience with you, and 
spares you, and calls, ^Turn ye, turn ye; for 
why will ye die?' You have seen your com- 
panions fall beside you in battle ; a few inches 
to the right or left, the ball would have taken 
you instead ; you have seen your comrades car- 
ried out daily for burial, — one of them from the 
bed on which I am now sitting; and every 
time the ' stretcher' with its burden passed you, 
God warned you, — ' Be thou also ready.' Did 
you not promise Him, before you went into 
battle, that you would do better if He would 
spare your life, and in a day or tAVO forgot it 
and became as careless as ever ? He sent sick- 

228 



A LIFE RESTORED* 11 

ness to you^ and when you thought you y^ere 
dying you promised Him again. Have you 
fulfilled that promise? God has said, ^My 
Spirit shall not always strive with man/ This 
may be your last warning and invitation. If 
you remain cold and careless through all you 
have suffered, you will not be very ai:)t to 
change if God should give you back health and 
home. Don^t you think it would be better for 
you to die now, than only live in rebellion 
against God and go on adding to your guilt 
and punishment? ^To-day if you will hear 
his voice, harden not your heart.^ There can 
be no more ^convenient season.^ Let me pray 
you, in Christ's stead, to be reconciled to God. 
Now, ' now is the accepted time :' there is no 
promise in the Bible for to-morrow. Think of 
these things ; pray earnestly to God that He will 
give you His Holy Spirit to show you your 
heart as He sees it, and make you feel your 
need of a Saviour, and turn to Him and live.'^ 

He did not answer, but his face showed me 
he was thinking; and, fearing to weary him, I 
went up among the others. 

229 



12 A LIFE RESTORED. 

^^ What says your heart to-day V^ I said, as 
1 came up to '' No. 25'^ a day or two after- 
wards. '' Does it look clean enough to pass into 
heaven without being washed in the Saviour's 
blood r 

^^No, indeed. I feel that I have done a great 
many wrong things ; that I am a great sinner 
in God's sight. I have prayed to Him, but my 
heart only seems to grow worse and worse. I 
could scarcely go to sleep last night, I was in 
such trouble. What must I do ?'' 

" Let us see what the Bible says. ^ Eepent 
ye, and believe the gospel.' ^Believe on the 
Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved.' 
This is what you must do : the promise is, 
' Thou shalt be saved ;' and God always keeps 
His promises. Do you truly repent f Remem- 
ber, there is no true repenting of any thing 
unless we turn from it, and determine, with 
God's help, that we will not do it again. Do 
you truly believe f You told me that you be- 
lieved the Bible; but how do you believe? If 
you were drowning, and some person should 
put his hand within your reach and offer to 

230 



A LIFE RESTORED. 13 

pull you out of the water and save you, you 
would be very a])t to grasp it. You would not 
say you believed him, and yet refuse to take 
his hand: you would deserve to die if you 
did. Just so you must let your heart reach out 
to the Saviour, and grasp tight hold of His 
promises. He says, ^ Come unto me, all ye that 
labour and are heavy-laden, and I w^ill give 
you rest.^ If your sins are heavy, take them 
to Jesus in prayer; tell Him all about them, 
and ask Him earnestly to take them from you. 
If you were pleading for your life, you w^ould 
ask earnestly, not as if you did not care whether 
you received it or not : just so earnestly must 
you ask pardon of God, and then you must give 
yourself to the Saviour, both body and soul, 
and tell Him so. Be perfectly willing that He 
should do with you just what He pleases, even 
though He should w^ant you to die to-morrow. 
Go to Him now, — this day, this hour. He says, 
' Him that cometh unto me I will in no wise 
cast out.^ How can you keep away from that 
dear Redeemer who so loved you as to give His 
life for you ? He is willing not only to save 

20- 231 



14 A LIFE EESTORED. 

you from hell, but to give you heaven, where 
there is no more sorrow nor pain nor war, — the 
only Friend able to take care of you in death, 
which you must pass through sooner or later. 
Your nurses and physicians are powerless in 
that hour. You have seen that. Even if you 
should die at home, your dearest friends can 
only look on and weep. But this blessed 
Saviour has passed through the grave before 
you, and is now at the right hand of God, 
waiting to intercede for you, and take you for 
His own.'^ 

I did not need toords to tell me the next day, 
as I came to his bedside, that his heart was 
filled with the " peace that passeth understand- 
ing.^^ His face spoke that, even before he 
reached out his hands, his eyes brimful of 
happy tears, and said, " I do believe that Christ 
will pardon all my sins, — that He has pardoned 
them,^^ he added, slowly and humbly. 

"Then there is joy in heaven at this mo- 
ment,^^ I said, as I grasped his hand. "And 
now, once more, let me ask you, What are you 

232 



A LIFE EESTORED. 15 

going to do with your earthly life if God gives 
it to you f 

"Spend it in His service, if He will help 

"Yes: He has a great deal for you to do, 
I trust, whether you go back to your regi- 
ment or go home. Never forget to tell to sin- 
ners round what a dear Saviour you have 
found. Now that you have enlisted under the 
great Captain of your salvation, you must try 
to get everybody you can to enlist too. You 
have seen men try very hard to raise a com- 
pany of soldiers to go to fight the battles of 
their country : so God wants you to be a ^ re- 
cruiting sergeant' for Him. You will find your 
commission in Ezek. 3 : 23, and Rev. 22 : 17: 
^Let him that heareth say, Come;' and try to 
have them love him too." 

It was a great comfort for many days after, 
as I passed up and down the ward, to see him 
lying quietly reading his Bible, or with his 
eyes closed and peace on his face, or to be 
greeted with a bright smile and a few happy 
words. "J do so want to begin to be a recruit- 

233 



16 A LIFE EESTOrtED. 

ing sergeant for the Lord's army/' he said one 
day ; " but I try to be patient and wait till He 
is ready/' 

Whether I sliall meet him again on earth, 
our Father only knows; but if ever I am per- 
mitted to enter heaven, I trust to find ^'No. 25" 
among the redeemed ones there. 



234 



HINDRANCES REMOVED, 



HINDRANCES REMOVED. 



GoiXG into one of the ^^ wounded'^ wards in 
the hospital at St. Louis a few days after it had 
been newly filled with patients from the Lower 
Mississippi, I passed from one to another of the 
brave men lying there so patiently, giving tracts 
and a few words to each, until I came to cot 
No. 20. Its occupant, a bright, intelligent- 
looking young man, looked up with a pleasant 
smile as I stood beside him. He had been 
wounded at Vicksburg, he told me, had suffered 
a great deal, but was better, and hoped to 
recover now. His eye kindled as he told me 
of those stormy days, and his own narrow 
escapes from death. 

'^ Our heavenly Father must have loved you 
a great deal when He preserved your life 

3 237 



4 HINDRANCES REMOVED. 

through so many dangers," I said. "A great 
many poor fellows were l^illed when you were 
wounded : were there not ?" 

" Yes : more than half our regiment was cut 
down." 

'' How would it have been with you, friend, 
had you been killed then ? Were you ready ?" 

" I am afraid not." 

" Then how kind our heavenly Father w^as, 
to let you come up here and give you a little 
quiet time to prepare for eternity ! A more 
* convenient season^ you cannot have, if you 
should live to be seventy years old. If you 
were at home, you would have cares and plea- 
sures and friends around you, to draw your 
mind away ; but here you have so much time 
that you do not know what to do with it. Don^t 
you think it would be wise to take this time 
to attend to your souFs eternal interests? You 
have thought about these things often : haven't 
you?" 

'' Yes. My parents were Christians, and 
taught me my duty; but I am afraid I did not 
mind them much. I have been very wicked, 

238 



HINDRANCES REMOVED. 5 

but still I couldn^t help thinking about these 
things sometimes. I have thought more about 
tliem since I have been wounded than I ever 
did before.^^ 

" You promised God, before you went into 
battle, that if He spared your life you would 
give yourself to Him; and after you were 
wounded, and thought you were going to die, 
you told Him so again : didn't you V^ 

"Yes: I believe I did.'' 

"And you still think you will do it some 
time?" 

"Yes." 

"TTAen willyoudoit?" 

"I don't know," he answered, slowly; "some 
time before long, I hope." 

" Let me tell you what is God's time, — and 
His time is always the best, because He knows 
' the end from the beginning :' — His time is now. 
There is no promise in His word that He will 
take you to-morrow. He says, ' Now is the ac- 
cepted time, now is the day of salvation.' You 
have seen enough to make you feel the uncer- 
tainty of life, and the danger of delay. Let me 

21 239 



6 HINDRANCES REMOVED. 

beseech you, in Clirist^s stead, to be reconciled 
to God now.'^ 

His face was very grave as he answered, ^^ I 
will try/' 

^'Say, Svith God's help/ brother.'' 

"Yes,— with God's help." And so I left 
him. 

We had a great many patients here then, — 
some very sick and dying; and I could only 
give him a few words as I passed him, for some 
time afterwards. Going into the ward one 
evening to have a long talk with him, I found 
him in deep trouble. 

^^ I have been reading my Bible," he said, 
" and praying, and trying to become a Christian ; 
but, instead of becoming better, I seem to be 
getting worse." 

" Suppose you stop trying, then, and give 
yourself up to Christ, just as you are, a lost and 
helpless sinner, and let Him make you better. 
He only can help you ; and He wants you, oh, 
so much ! He says, ^ Come unto me, all ye that 
labour and are heavy-laden, and I will give you 
rest.' ^Whosoever will, let him come;' and 

240 



HINDRANCES REMOVED. 7 

^Him that cometh unto me I will in no wise 
cast out.' ' Come, for all things are now ready .^ 
He has done all that was needful to make your 
way clear to Him and to heaven.'^ 

^^I know/' was the sad answer, ^Hhe fault is 
with me, and I don't know what it is." 

"Let us look at some of the stumbling- 
blocks that Satan and our own hearts some- 
times throw in our way to keep us back. One 
is this. We have heard people tell their reli- 
gious experience in prayer-meetings, and we 
have read the experience of others, and we 
think we must feel just as they did, or else we 
are not right. Is that in your way ?" 

" It may be that it is." 

" Let me ask you a question. Among all the 
thousands of soldiers you saw at Vicksburg, 
did you ever see two who looked exactly alike?" 
/^No." 

"And yet they all had the same set of fea- 
tures: hadn't they?" 

" Yes." 

"Let me tell you, if every one of them had 
become a Christian in one day, no two of them 

241 



8 HINDRANCES REMOVED. 

would have had exactly the same religious ex- 
perience; and yet each one of them would have 
to ^repent, and believe on the Lord Jesus 
Christ/ or he could not be saved. You never 
saw two persons who had exactly the same dis- 
positions, or felt exactly the same on any sub- 
ject : did you ?'^ 

"No: I think not.'' 

" Until you do, you can never find two who 
have exactly the same feelings on the subject of 
religion; and yet each one must ^repent, and 
believe/ or else he cannot get into heaven. 
You have not exactly the same sins to repent 
of that any other man has. It is utterly im- 
possible for you to feel exactly like any one else. 
Do you understand this ?'' 

" Yes : that is all plain." 

" Then, again, sometimes we think that we 
must have very deep convictions of sin before 
God will receive us. We have heard of those 
who felt so deeply, and we think we must too ; 
and so we keep trying to work up our feelings 
higher, instead of giving our hearts to God. 
We are really trying to bring our convictions 

242 



HINDRANCES REMOVED. 9 

of sin as a price in our hands, and claiming our 
pardon, because we have suffered so much ; we 
keep on looking into our hearts to see how much 
we feel, instead of looking out of ourselves to 
Christ. Just as if you should shut your eyes 
and try to examine yourself mentally whether 
you could see, instead of looking up at that 
lamp and taking the light into your eye to 
prove it. Our feelings have nothing to do with 
buying our pardon ; because it is bought already. 
All we need is to feel that we are lost sinners in 
God^s sight; that we cannot save ourselves; that 
no one on earth can save us; but that Christ 
caifiy and to give ourselves up to Him and let 
Him save us. Is that plain ?^^ 
^' Yes. I see now : it is all true.^^ 
"Another thing that gets in our way some- 
times is this. We think we must read our Bibles, 
and pray a great deal, and try to do right and 
keep from doing wTong, and so gradually work 
ourselves up nearer to the Saviour, and then He 
will come and meet us. My friend, He came 
all the way from heaven down to you. You 
cannot go up one step except by His taking 

21'!^ 243 



10 HINDRANCES REMOVED. 

you. You cannot do any good without His 
help. You have tried that, and failed. How 
many times you have determined to do right, 
and the first thing you knew you were doing 
wrong! No man since Adam is able to escape 
eternal death by keeping the Law perfectly. 
God don't ask you to save yourself that way. 
He says, ^By the deeds of the law there shall 
no flesh be justified in His sight.' Suppose 
you could begin now and keep the law per- 
fectly : suppose you should never speak another 
sinful word, or think a sinful thought, or do a 
sinful act, all the rest of your life, and you 
should live to be one hundred years old: you 
have already the sins of tw^enty years or more 
to account for. How is that debt to be paid ? 
You cannot pay it. You cannot do more than 
right at any future moment. You cannot lay 
up a surplus of goodness to cancel that debt ; 
and, until it is paid, you can never enter 
heaven. 

" Suppose you should run up a long account 
at the sutler's, and were too poor to pay it, and 
should go to him and tell him you would never 

244 



HINDRANCES REMOVED. 11 

get in debt to him again: would he take that 
as payment?'^ 

'' No : I should think not/' 

" No : he could not^ and be just to himself. 
But suppose you had a friend who was rich 
enough to pay it, and would do so, and the 
sutler should accept his money instead of yours: 
could you then go free V^ 

^' Yes : I suppose I could.'' 

^' My friend, Christ has paid your debt by 
the fearful price of His own body on the tree. 
Never forget this. You could not possibly 
come into this room at this moment, could 
you? because you are in it already. Do you 
understand ?" 

" Yes : I see what you mean." 

" So you cannot possibly buy your pardon ; 
because it is bought already. You might feel 
until you became deranged,' — you might do 
all the good works that ever have been or ever 
will be done in the world, and you could not 
pay for your pardon; because it is paid for 
already. Christ paid your debt on Calvary. 
He has suffered in your stead ; and by His rising 

245 



12 HINDRANCES EEMOVED. 

again from the dead, God showed the world 
that He had accepted Him as a substitute in 
your place. ' It is finished/ were the Sa- 
viour's dying words. The atonement was com- 
plete. You have nothing to do but to accept 
the purchased pardon, ' without money and with- 
out price/ and accept it willingly. He will not 
force you to take it; but you can have it simply 
for the taking.'^ 

" That is what puzzles me/' he said. '' How 
am I to accept it? How am I to ^come to 
Jesus'? If He was on the earth, as He was 
once, I think I would go thousands of miles, 
and walk every step of the way if I was able, 
to get to Him ; but He is in heaven, and I am 
here. How, then, am I to come to Him in such 
a way as to be saved ?" 

'^ My friend, if your heart does not deceive 
you, you have come very necvr to Him now. 
These convictions of sin, these strong desires 
after God and holiness, where do they come 
from ? I\ot from your own heart; you did not 
want them, and they have come to you, time and 
again, when nobody had been talking to you 

2-16 



HINDRANCES REMOVED. 13 

about these things^ when you had not been 
reading your Bible^ and when death seemed far 
away. But they made you feel uncomfortable^ 
and you tried to drive them away. They have 
come back to you again. They came directly 
from the Saviour. He sent down His Holy 
Spirit to put them into your heart. The Holy 
Spirit is at work in your heart now. He is 
making you feel that reading your Bible, or 
praying, cannot save you; that your good 
works cannot save you ; that you must lean on 
something stronger, or else you cannot be safe. 
The Spirit is pointing you to ' The Lamb of 
God, which taketh away the sin of the world.^ 
Can you not look up to Him as He hung in 
agony on the cross, and believe in Him? that 
He suffered for your sins, and that because He 
died you are saved ? The dear Saviour is very 
near you now. You cannot see Him, you can- 
not hear Him, but you feel something of His 
love as He stands with open arms saying, ' Come 
and be saved.^ Every moment you refuse to do 
this, you are holding out against Him. You are 
a rebel against His government He requires you 

217 



14 HINDRANCES REMOVED. 

to make an unconditional surrender of your whole 
self, — soul and body, — all that you have and 
are, both for time and for eternity, into His 
care and keeping, to save you just as He 
pleases, to do with you just what He pleases. 
These are the terms of pardon and of peace. 
These are the only terms God offers. He asks 
nothing more, He will take nothing less. When- 
ever you feel that willingness to give your whole 
self to Him, ^ holding nothing back,^ trusting 
in Christ only, then you have ^come to Jesus;' 
then you do believe in the Lord Jesus Christ, — 
then you are a Christian, and are saved. That 
is God's plan. Man's plan is to try to work his 
own way into heaven ; God's plan is, that we 
take Christ for our Saviour, — give ourselves up 
to Him here, and He w^ill be with us even to 
the end of life. When we go down to death, 
we need not fear ; for He is stronger than the 
grave. When our eyes close on this world, we 
shall see Him waiting for us on the other side, 
and feel His strong arm around us ; for He has 
promised, ^I will come again and receive you 
unto myself; that where I am, there ye may be 

248 



HINDRANCES TvEMOVED. 15 

also/ And when we appear before God to 
^ give an account for the deeds done in the 
body, whether they be good, or whether they 
be evil/ if we really belong to Christ, He will 
claim us then. Because He has suffered and 
died in our place, we shall stand in God^s sight 
as if we had never sinned, and so the Saviour 
will take us into heaven with Himself. This is 
the only way we can get there. 

'' Xow, bow is it with you ? Do you feel that 
you can take that dear Saviour at His word, 
and trust in Him now ? Do you feel willing to 
give your w^hole self to Him this night before 
you sleep? There is no need of waiting. 
There is no need of doubt or fear,^^ I said, 
quietly, as I saw he was deeply moved. "You 
cannot be more willmg to give yourself to Him 
than He is to take you. He died — that precious 
Saviour — to show how much He w^anted you. 
We will wait a few minutes while you ask God 
to show you your heart as lie sees it ; and if you 
iind any thing there pulling you back, and say- 
ing, 'Not just now : ivait until to-morrow^ or some 
more convenient season,' pray earnestly to Him 

249 



16 HINDRANCES REMOVED. 

to take whatever it is out of your heart at once. 
He will do it ; and then if you think you can, 
in His heart-searching presence, willingly ac- 
cept the Saviour and give yourself to Him, we 
will go to Him and tell Him so/^ 

He buried his face in the pillow; but I could 
see the struggle going on, by the sobs that shook 
him, and my heart went with his to plead that 
Christ might have the victory, — and so, I trust, 
He had. In a few minutes he became calmer, 
and looking up through the tears that still 
dimmed his eyes, he said, earnestly, " I think I 
can, God helping me f and, kneeling by his bed- 
side, together we took his soul and laid it at the 
feet of Jesus, and there I left him. 

His cot was nearest the door, and a little 
apart from the others. Coming quietly into 
the ward at twilight a few evenings afterwards, 
I heard ^^No. 20'^ humming a hymn-tune softly 
to himself. 

" Feeling happy, are you?^^ I asked, as I stood 
before him. 

What a bright smile greeted me ! '^ Yes, very 
happy.'' 

250 



HINDRANCES REMOVED. 17 

" Why are you so happy ?'^ 
^^ Because I have found my Saviour/' 
Drawing a hospital stool beside his cot, and 
sitting down, I had a long talk with him about 
some of the evidences we can have that we are 
"born again/' and as to his future Christian 
life on earth, if our heavenly Father should give 
him one. I gave him a small Bible as his 
"guide-book'' for the way; and he was still 
steadily and quietly walking in the path marked 
out for him in it, and ascending into clearer 
heights, when I lost all trace of him, nearly a 
year afterwards. 

251 



22 



THE 



INQUIRER "HALTING" 



AT 



'REPENTANCE" AND "FAITH." 



INQUIRER "HALTING" 



AT 



REPENTANCE" AND "FAITH." 



Among the soldiers whom I used to see most 

frequently in the reading-room of the A 

Hospital, was a lame corporal, who was so much 
better, when he came to us, that he could walk 
around the grounds, with the help of his cane, 
although he was too badly crippled ever to be 
able to march again. 

The reading-room was furnished with an 
excellent library ; and, as he was very fond of 
reading, he used to spend the greater part of 
his time there, instead of in his ward. 

He was not a Christian, he told me one day 
when I went to replenish my stock of reading- 
matter for the wards, from the box of tracts we 

3 22* 255 



4 INQUIRER HALTING 

had sent to the room ; that he knew he ought 
to be one^ — he had always intended to become 
one ; but, somehow, he had never found just the 
right time yet. He used to think about these 
things a good deal, when he was a boy, but he 
had put off attending to them until he should 
become settled in life; and then, after he was 
married, the cares of his family and his busi- 
ness had so taken up his mind that he could 
scarcely find time to think of any thing else. 
And then, after the war broke out, there was so 
much excitement, and after he enlisted he was 
almost always on duty or on the march; and 
that kept his mind unsettled. 

^^ But after I was wounded, I resolved that, if 
God would only spare my life and let me get 
home again, I would not put off attending to 
my soul any longer.^^ 

"Yes, I know; but when you go home you 
will think that you will wait until after you 
have seen all of your old friends and enjoyed 
their society for a little while ; and then your 
business, whatever it is, will have fallen into 
disorder, or will have been broken up, in your 

256 



AT KEPENTANCE AND FAITH. 5 

absence, and you will think that you must wait 
until you get that all right again. And after 
that is done, you will think it best to wait until 
you make enough money to gain this or that, 
upon which you have set your heart, or have 
secured a competence for your family, so that 
you will not have so much care on your mind. 
And then, when you have accomplished that, 
you will find some other excuse for delay, — 
just as thousands are doing at this hour, who 
will die in their sins. 

'^ When they are well, they are too busy with 
this world to get ready for the next And when 
sickness comes to them, they find that when the 
body is suffering it is a very poor time to attend 
to the soul ; and so they quiet their consciences 
with a few more ^ good resolutions,^ from day 
to day, and the ' convenient season^ is never 
found. 

^^If you should go with *me through the 
wards to-day, I could show you men who are 
doing that very thing, — clinging with a mad 
hope to life, in spite of every warning, until their 
souls' suicide is accomplished, — doing it, even 

257 



6 INQUIRER HALTING 

while you and I can see, as we look at them, 
that they are in the very grasp of death. 

^^ The reason that so many act so, is this : — 
They do nqj really want to become Christians 
at all. (Because a man who is willing to be an 
honest man next month, or next year, but is not 
willing to be an honest man to-day, is not really 
willing to be an honest man at all, if he can 
help it.) If they could only be sure that they 
would live for fifty years yet, they would put 
away all thoughts of God from their minds for 
forty-nine of them, use forty-nine years for the 
world, as they pleased, and then give the last 
year, when they could not enjoy the world any 
longer, — give the very dregs of their lives to 
God, just so that they could get into heaven. 

^^I am afraid that He takes very few who 
treat Him in that way, or attempt to come to 
Him with such a motive. Very few old men, 
who have deliberately spent their lives in sin, 
become Christians. Their hearts become harder 
every time they resist God^s Spirit, and they go 
farther from Him; and the love of the world 
grows stronger with the sinner's years. 

268 



AT REPENTANCE AND FAITH. 7 

^^ I have stood beside a great many death-beds 
in these years in the hospitals, and I have never 
stood beside one who had intended to die with- 
out becoming a Christian, any more than you do 
at this moment ; and yet very many did so die 
just as surely as if they had planned it all their 
lives. 

^^ Somebody says, ^ The road to hell is paved 
wdth good intentions;' and what they mean by 
that is this : — Sometimes, when a sinner's friends 
die, or some startling providence awakens his 
fears, or God's Spirit shows him his sin and 
danger, and makes him feel his need of a 
Saviour, and tries to draw him to Jesus, he says 
to himself, ^Yes, I know that I am doing 
wrong. I ought to do better. It is not right 
to act as I am doing; and I really will begin to 
do better, just as soon as I get through with 
this, or that, that I have on my mind now. I 
am determined on that.' And so he says to the 
Spirit, ' Go thy way, for this time only.^ It is 
not convenient to attend to these things to-day. 
I am too busy ; I am too sick ; I have not time 

1 Acts 24 : 25. 

259 



8 INQUIRER HALTING 

just notv; when I have a more convenient 
season I will call for thee. I will solemnly 
promise God to do that/ And he thinks that 
he really will do it. But when the time that he 
has appointed comes, he has grown careless, or 
thinks that there is no need for haste, he has 
plenty of time yet; or he forgets it until the 
time has passed; or he has some other project 
on his mind, which he thinks he must attend to 
first. ^ Just this once more. I pray thee have 
me excused.^ ^ 

"And so it goes on to the day of his death, 
— cheating himself of heaven, adding to his sin 
against God by his promise to Him, — by his 
^good intentions' to do at some future time what 
he ought to do now, — by his ^ good resolutions,^ 
made in his own strength, and so made only to 
be broken. 

" If such a man could only fully realize, for 
one moment, to what Satan and his own deceit- 
ful heart were leading him, where the road he 
was travelling would end, and how it would 
end, he would give God, not simply promises 

1 Luke 14 : 16-2L 
260 



AT REPENTANCE AND FAITH. 9 

and good resolutions, but give Him his heart at 
once. 

^^ You think that you will never act as such 
persons do. Oh, no ! You will not harbour 
such a thought for a moment. But, friend, you 
are following closely in their footsteps, and 
have done so for years ; and their steps go dovv^n 
to death. 

"For the sake of your own souFs eternal 
welfare, do not trifle with that souPs eternal 
interests any longer ; but give yourself up to 
Jesus now. You can never have a more con- 
venient season, although you may think that 
you will. Eepent and believe on the Lord Jesus 
now; that your sins may be blotted out,^ and 
your soul saved.^^ 

" I am trying to become a Christian,'^ he said, 
some time afterwards, as I stopped to speak with 
him, on my way through the reading-room. 

"I have been reading my Bible and other 
good books, and praying a great deal; and I 
never miss a night from the prayer-meeting, 
when I can help it.^^ 

1 Acts 3 : 19. 

261 



10 INQUIRER HALTING 

^^And do you tliink that you are making any 
progress ?'^ 

^' I don't know. Sometimes I think I am; 
and then, again, something will go wrong, and 
I w^ill get provoked, and slip back again as far 
as ever/' 

" That is, you are trying to make yourself 
better before you give yourself to Christ, — trying 
to work out your own salvation in party and 
then that part you find you cannot do yourself, 
you will let Christ do for you. 

" You are trying to work yourself up nearer 
to the Saviour, so that He will come a part of 
the loay and meet you. Is that it ?" 

" Well, yes. A man must do his part, you 
know.'' 

^^What is 'man^s pa7'f in his own salvation, 
friend?" 

" Well, he must try all he can to do right and 
keep from doing wrong." 

" Trying to climb up into heaven that way is 
like a man's trying to climb a very steep and 
slippery mountain which it is impossible for 
him to climb alone. 

262 



AT rvEPEXTAXCE AXD FAITH. 11 

'^ He keeps moving his feet, and thinks that 
he is making some progress; but every little 
while he loses his footing, and falls, and slips 
back again, if possible, farther than ever. And 
so he may keep on trying forever, and be no 
nearer to the top than when he first started. 

^^\nd all the while that he is looking to the 
ground and measuring his steps, he is refusing 
to look up and reach out his hand to One who 
is standing right beside him, — the only One 
who is able to help him, and without whom 
he cannot ascend one step. 

^^The Saviour came all the icay down to the 
foot of the hill, to you, friend. And He is be- 
side you, reaching out His hand, mighty to 
save,^ and saying, ' Look to me, and be saved.' ^ 
^By the deeds of the law shall no flesh be justi- 
fied.'^ ^No man cometh to the Father but by 

'' That is your mistake, friend. You are try- 
ing to do for yourself what Jesus has done for 
you. ' Christ is the end of the law for right- 

1 Isa. 63 : 1. ^ ig^^, 45 . 00. 

^ Kom. 3 : 20. * John 14 : 6. 

23 2C3 



12 INQUIRER HALTING 

eousness to every one that believeth on Him.'^ 
He not only redeems them from the penalty of 
a broken law, but He fulfilled all that law for 
them. He perfectly obeyed that law, and God 
has accepted His perfect obedience in the place 
oi theirs: so that, when the sinner gives himself 
to Jesus, the law has no more claim on his past 
life ; his sins are all forgiven for Christ's sake. 
And the sins that he commits after he becomes 
a Christian, he must take to Jesus too ; and, if 
he truly repents and asks for pardon, God will, 
for Christ's sake, forgive him.^ That is the 
only way by which sin can be pardoned.^ Take 
your sins to Jesus now, friend, and let Him 
make you clean; for He only can." 

'' I am afraid I do not repent enough,'' he 
said, when I saw him again, and found him still 
without hope. 

"How much repentance ought you to have 
before you come to Christ, friend?" 

" Well, I don't know. I am afraid I do not 
have deep enough convictions of sin. Perhaps 



1 Rom. 10 


:4. 






2 


1 John 2 


:1. 


3 Mark 2 : 


7. 


Matt. 


9: 


: 6. 


Rom. 3 : 


25. 


26A 















AT REPENTANCE AND FAITH. 13 

I think too much of convictions of sin; but I 
do not know the reason that I don't feel better, 
unless it should be that/' 

^^What have ^convictions of sin' to do with 
your salvation, friend ?" 

^^ Well, the Bible says, ^Except ye repent, ye 
shall all likewise perish.'"^ 

^^And so we shall ; because, if we do not feel 
that we are sinners, w^e shall not seek the Sa- 
viour. But our repentance cannot blot out a 
single sin; and a great many repent who w^ill 
never enter heaven, because their repentance did 
not lead them to give up their sins and turn to 
Jesus.^ 

^^A man who kills another may bitterly re- 
pent of the act ; but his repentance can neither 
bring the dead man to life, nor free the mur- 
derer from his guilt, nor save him from the 
scaffold. There is only one hope for him, — that 
he may be pardoned. If he has any friend 
powerful enough to obtain that for him, he can 
go free. Suppose that friend comes to him, in 
his cell, with an open pardon in his hand, and 

1 Luke 13 : 3. ^2 Cor. 7 : 10. 

265 



14 INQUIRER HALTING 

says, ^ It IS yours, if you will only take it/ If 
that prisoner really feels his need and his 
danger, he reaches out his hand, takes it, and is 
free. 

"So, you are ^condemned already.'^ Your 
trial is over;^ you are sentenced to death,^ and 
only waiting for the day of execution. Your 
^convictions of sin,^ your ^repentance,' can 
neither satisfy a broken law, nor free you from 
its penalty. There is only one hope for you, — 
that you can be pardoned, 

" Christ has bought that pardon for you, at 
the price of His own life, and offers it to you, as 
a free gift, if you will only accept it. 

" ^ No,' you say : ^ I must repent enough to 
earn it.' What has repentance to do with buy- 
ing it, friend ? It is bought already, 

" You say, ' I do not have deep enough con- 
victions of sin. I must feel a great deal worse 
before I can pay for it.' 

" How can convictions of sin pay for it, 
friend? It is jpaic? /or already." 

1 John 3 : 18. 2 L^^e 1 : 79. 

3 Rom. 5: 12. Ezek. 18 : 4. 
266 



AT REPENTANCE AND FAITH. 15 

^^ But the Bible says^ ^Strive to enter in at the 
strait gate.' '^ ^ 

^^ Yes ; but it cannot be a striving self-right- 
eousness that is meant, because Christ spoke 
that to the self-righteous^ Jews, whom He had 
so often reproved for striving to commend them- 
selves to God,^ and to those who, like them, go 
about to ' establish their own righteousness,' and 
so do not 'submit themselves unto the righteous- 
ness of God/^ 

"Now, this striving after more repentance, 
and deeper convictions of sin, and trying to 
make ourselves better before coming to Jesus, 
is just the workings of a self-righteous ^ sinful 
spirit in us, to keep us from the Saviour. 

"We are too proud to take salvation as a 
gift; we are trying to buy our pardon. We 
are really offering our ' convictions of sin,' our 
' repentance,' as a price in our hands ; and we 
think that the deeper those convictions are, the 
more sorrow we feel, the more claim we have on 

1 Luke 13 : 24. 2 Matt. 5 : 20. 

3 Luke 18 : 9. Matt. 9 : 13. 

* Kom. 9 : 31-33. Eom. 10 : 1-11. 

^ 267 



16 INQUIRER HALTING 

God for pardon. And so, if, at any time, we 
feel our trouble growing less, we try to work 
our feelings up higher ; and when we are in the 
most trouble, there is a self-satisfied feeling lurk- 
ing in our hearts, along with the trouble, as if 
we were purifying ourselves and making our- 
selves more acceptable to God by our sufferings 
(something after the manner of those who do 
penance for their sins), instead of coming to 
Christ at once, as we should. 

^^ No. As long as we ' strive' in that way, 
we are refusing to enter through the strait 
gate which is in Christ Jesus,^ — we are striving 
to enter in by ' climbing up some other way.' 
We are simply rejecting Christy and striving^ 
against the Spirit^ as He tries to draw us to the 
Saviour; and we resist the Spirit and refuse 
Christ every day and hour that we do soT 

" Why, how can that be ?" 

" Let me illustrate. Suppose that you were 
starving to death : you had not a penny to buy 
food with, and you were too weak to make the 
least effort to earn it. A friend comes in, and 

1 John 10: 9. 2 John 10 : 1. 

268 



AT REPENTANCE AND FAITH. 17 

spreads a table with the best of food, which he 
has bought for you, and begs you to eat of it. 

" ^ No/ you say : ' I must strive to get food 
for myself/ Don^t you see that you would be 
rejecting that friend's kindness and love every 
moment that you tried to ' strive' to get food for 
yourself? You would be refusing to taJce what 
he had already provided for you. 

^^ Christ has spread the table of salvation^ 
with the ^ bread of life.'^ All things are now 
ready/ He says ; ^ ' take, and eat.' ^ The longer I 
strive to save myself, the longer I refuse to take 
the salvation which He has already provided for 
me. The more I strive to make myself better, 
the longer I refuse to go to Christ and let Him 
wash me from my sins. The more I strive to 
earn my pardon, the longer I refuse to accept 
the pardon bought and paid for on Calvary, and 
offered to me Svithout money and without 
price.' ^ Is that true ?" 

" Yes. I see now." 

1 Luke 22 : 30. 2 jo^n q . 32-59. 

3 Matt. 22 : 4. Luke 14 : 17. 

* Matt. 26 : 26. 1 Cor. 10 : 16. ^ jga. 55 : 1. 

269 



18 .INQUIRER HALTING 

'' Do you feel that you are a sinner in God's 
sight^ friend ?'' 

^^Yes, Ido/' 

^^Do you feel it enough to make you feel 
your need of a Saviour f^ 

^^Yes^ I do. I know I need Him/' 

" Do you feel it enough to be willing to give 
up your sins, if God will help you, and to be 
willing to give yourself to Christ, soul and body, 
for time and for eternity, to be and to do only 
as He would wish to have you, from this hour? 
Would you be willing to become a Christian to- 
day, do j^ou think ?'' 

^^ Yes,— if I only could/' 

^' You can, God says, ' Now is the accepted 
time.' Now is the day of salvation^ with Him. 
Our time is to-morrow, or the next day; but 
God^s time is 'noioJ Go to Jesus, then, now, 
— just as you are, — and you have His pledged 
word that He will receive you." ^ 

^^ But how can a man become a Christian as 
soon as that ?" 

^' How long did it take the thief on the cioss 

1 2 Cor. 6:2. 2 j^h^ g . 27. 

270 



AT REPENTANCE AND FAITH. 19 

to become a Christian/ do you think ? Or the 
jailer and his family, who were convicted of 
sin, at midnight, and rejoiced, believing in God,^ 
in the same hour? Or the eunuch who was 
converted in his chariot, even while Philip was 
telling him of Jesus, the first time that he had 
heard of the Saviour?^ Or the Hhree thousand 
souls' who were convicted of sin, and converted, 
too, on the day of Pentecost?^ 

'^ So many think that they must go through a 
^course' of repentance and feeling, before God 
will take them, — prepare themselves, before 
Jesus will accept of them ; but that is not true. 
Every day and hour that they hold back, wait- 
ing for conviction, or striving to prepare them- 
selves, instead of pleasing God they are dis- 
pleasing Him ; because every day and hour they 
do so, they are resisting the Spirit and refusing 
Christ. 

" If you had been a heathen, — one who had 
never hew^d of God or of Christ, or of the plan 
of salvation, until this hour, — knew nothing of 

1 Luke 23 : 42, 43. ^ ^^tg 16 : 25-35. 

3 Acts 8 : 27-40. * Acts 2 : 37-42. 

271 



20 INQUIRER HALTING 

your sins, nothing of repentance for sin, until 
since I began talking to you, - — still God's 
message to you would be, ' Come now^ even while 
I speak. ' Now is the accepted time/ ^ Come,' 
just as you are. 'Now is the day 0/ salvation.' 
^Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou 
shalt be saved,' ^ note. Every day and hour 
that you refuse to do that, you are only adding 
to your sin against God." 

'^ But I need to have more faith than I have, 
before I come to Christ."' 

" Is faith to be your Saviour, friend ?" 

"You know that the Bible says that we are 
saved by faith." 

" Christ is the Saviour, the Bible tells us, 
friend, — not faith. We are saved through faith' 
in Jesus.^ Faith in Him is only the condition 
on which He will save us. Faith is only the 
arm by which we reach out and grasp hold of 
Christ and receive salvation in Him. 

" Would you like to have this, to take home 
with you, friend?" I said, taking a small, gilt- 
edged Bible out of my satchel, and holding 

1 Acts 16 : 31. 2 Eph. 2 : 8. 

272 



AT repenta:s;Ce and faith. 21 

it just within his reach (as I saw that his idea 
of faith was still not very clear). 

''Yes : I would like it very much.^^ 

"You can have it as a gift, if you will only 
reach out your hand and take it ; but I cannot 
let you have it unless you do that.^^ 

He looked a little surprised. 

" I will pay you for it. I would like to have 
it to take home to my little daughter.^^ 

" No : I will not sell it. I will give it to you, 
only on that condition. And I do want very 
much that you should have it. I do want very 
much that you should take it out of my hand 
and receive it as your own.^^ 

He reached out his hand, took it, and thanked 
me for it. 

" Now that it is yours, friend,'^ I said, as he 
was looking at it, " how did you get it f^ 

''Why, you gave it to me.^^ 

" What had you to do to obtain it ?^' 

" Why, nothing, except to take it from your 
hand.^^ 

'' Did your reaching out your hand earn the 
book ? Was it any merit in you to do so ?^^ 

273 



22 INQUIRER HALTING 

" No : it was only the condition on which you 
gave it to me/^ 

'^ Did that condition make it any the less a 
gift to you ?'' 

" No : only I would not have got it unless I 
had reached out for it, I suppose/^ 

"Your pride rebelled for a moment at taking 
it on that condition: didn't it? You would 
have felt better satisfied with yourself — more 
independent^ so to speak, — under less obligation 
to the giver — if you could have paid for it, in- 
stead of taking it as a gift. You had to get 
rid of that pride, first, before you could take it. 
Is that true ?" 

" Yes : I believe you are right/' 

" Now, salvation is GodJs gift to you ; ^ only, 
more of a gift than any thing you could receive 
from man, because God has to give you not 
only the gift itself, but the power to tahe it,^ too. 

"Christ is God's gift^ to you; you can have 
salvation only in Him ; ^ for ' by grace are ye 
saved through faith' in Christ, ' and that not of 

1 Eom. 6 : 23. ^ ph^, i . 29. s joj^n 4 : 10. 

* Acts 4 : 12. Eph. 1 : 7. 
274 



AT REPENTANCE AND FAITH. 23 

yourselves: it is the gift of God/^ Christ 
holds a full pardon for sin/ and a ' title-deed^ 
to heaven/ in His hand, and holds them out to 
you on the condition of your receiving Him as 
your Saviour.^ 

^^ Faith is only the hand with which you 
grasp the Saviour^ and Avith Him receive pardon 
and heaven.^ 

" Faith, or your taking what He gives, cannot 
earn any merit for you, neither does it make 
salvation any less a free gift from God : it is 
only the arm which the condemned prisoner 
reaches out to grasp hold of the pardon which 
his friend has already obtained for him ana 
holds within his reach. If he will not take it 
for his own, that friend's effort has been in 
vain i ^ the criminal must die. 

" Faith, or your reaching out your heart for 
that gift, is only the condition upon which God 
will give it to you. He will not sell it] it is 
bought for you already. ^Repentance,' or 

1 Eph. 2:8. 2 Eph. 1 : 6, 7. 

3 1 Pet. 1 : 3, 4. 2 Tim. 4:8. * Acts 16 : 31. 

5 Heb. 6 : 18. ^ jga. 49 : 4. 

24 276 



24 INQUIRER HALTING 

^ faith/ or ^convictions of sin/ or ^good works/ 
cannot earn that pardon; because it is paid for 
already^ and offered to you, freely. But your 
pride rebels against taking it as a gift. You are 
trying to earn it — in part, at least — by convic- 
tions of sin ; by faith ; by repentance ; by good 
works ; by something in yourself, which may 
pay for it in part, so that you can feel more 
independent of God (so to speak) and better 
satisfied with yourself. 

" That is what keeps men away from the Sa- 
viour, so often, — waiting for deeper convictions 
of sin, and more faith, — pride, and a self-right- 
eous spirit ; although they may not be conscious 
of the motive. They want to earn salvation, if 
they can, instead of taking it as a gift.^^ 

"Is that all that a man must do? — simply 
take it?" 

"What else can he do, friend? He is an 

utter, ruined, helpless bankrupt, a debtor to 

the whole law,^ dependent upon the mercy of his 

Creditor for every moment of his life, for every 

breath he draws,^ even. And there is no ^ bank- 

1 Deut. 27 ; 26. James 2 : 10. ^ Lament. 3 : 22. 

276 



AT REPENTANCE AND FAITH. 25 

rupt law' in all of God's dominions, for him to 
take the benefit of. 

'' Do you think that if man could have done 
any thing to save himself, God would have 
given His only and well-beloved Son^ as a 
sacrifice, or Christ would have suffered what 
He did? 2 

" No, friend : Christ must be all, and in all 
— our Redeemer.^ 

*' What is left for man to do? What do you 
think the Saviour meant, when He said, ^ It is 
finished,' ^ as He bowed His head and died on 
Calvary?" 

" That His work was done.'^ 

" Yes, — dear Jesus ! — His worlcy^ and yours^ too. 
The whole ' work' of Redemption was finished 
in that moment:^ and His resurrection is the 
^ receipt' which God gives the sinner, to show 
to justice, that his debt of sin has been paid to 
the Ml? 

1 Matt. 3 : 17. John 4 : 9, 10. 2 q^L 2 : 21. 

3 Eom. 3 : 21. Kom. 2 : 21. Col. 3 : 3, 4-11. 

* John 19 : 30. ^ joi^n 17 : 4. Isa. 59 : 16. 

« John 6 : 28, 29. Heb. 10 : 12-19. ^ Heb. 9 : 11-23. 

8 Eom. 5 : 9, 10. Eom. 8 : 34. Eom. 4 : 25. 

277 



26 INQUIRER HALTING 

"^What must I do to be saved ?^ the jailer 
asks. Do ! AVhat can you do, except to trust in 
what has been done for you ? 

" ^ Believe/ trust in the Lord Jesus Christ, 
and He will save you. 

^^ ^ This is the work of God, that ye believe on 
Him whom He hath sent.^ ^ 

^^ Jesus loves you as you are, — a sinner: the 
cross has proved that to you.^ He bids you 
come to Him just as you are, — a sinner.^ His 
Spirit is waiting, at this moment, to lead you 
to that dear Saviour. Do not hold out against 
Him any longer. 

^^ Give your heart to Jesus now, — this very 
day, — and let Him wash it from sin, and fill it 
with His Spirit, and you will have such convic- 
tions of sin, such a sight of yourself, such a 
view of sin as. it appears to God, as you never 
had in your life before.^ 

"Ask Him, earnestly, to help you, by His 
Spirit, to give yourself up to Jesus noio, to say 
to Him, sincerely, — 

1 John 6 : 29. 1 John 3 : 28. ^ j^^^j^. 5 . g. 

3 Matt. 9 : 12, 13. * Eph. 1 : 17, 18. 

278 



AT REPENTANCE AND FAITH. 27 

" Just as I am, without one plea, 
But that thy blood was shed for me, 
Aud that thou bidd'st me come to thee, 
O Lamb of God, I come. 

" Just as I am, and waiting not 
To rid my soul of one dark blot. 
To thee, whose blood can cleanse each spot, 
O Lamb of God, I come. 

" Just as I am, though toss'd about 
With many a conflict, many a doubt, 
Fightings within, and fears without, 

O Lamb of God, I come. 

" Just as I am, — thou wilt receive, 
Wilt welcome, pardon, cleanse, relieve, 
Because thy promise I believe, — 

O Lamb of God, I come. 

" Just as I am, — thy love unknown 
Has broken every barrier down ; 
Now to be thine, yes, thine alone, — 

O Lamb of God, I come.^' 

^^You were riglit/^ he said to me, months 
afterwards, as we were talking about that dear 
Saviour whom he loved. 

^^You spoke the truth when you told me 
that I would have deeper convictions of sin 
after I became a Christian than I ever had 
before. It seems to me I get new views of my 

2^ 279 



28 INQUIRER HALTING 

sinful heart every day. I used to think that I 
was a pretty good sort of a man, — as good, at 
least, as the most of those around me ; although 
I knew I should have to become a Christian 
before I could get into heaven ; but now I can 
see that my whole life was a sin against God. I 
can see sin in myself where I never thought of 
looking for it before ; and I feel it so strong in 
my heart yet, that I have to watch and fight 
against it all the time. But, thank God ! I get 
the grace and the strength to overcome it, too, 
I hope.^^ 

He had been appointed a librarian by this 
time ; and, as the reading-room and tlie chapel 
were in the same building, he was never, unless 
unavoidably prevented, absent from the soldiers' 
nightly prayer-meeting. 

The soldiers usually conducted these meetings 

themselves in the A Hospital. As one 

" leader'^ was sent to his regiment, or discharged, 
another was raised up to take his place. 

And very, very pleasant those meetings were, 
as the hearts of hundreds, still on earth, to-day 
can testify. The leader usually opened the 

280 



AT REPENTANCE AND FAITH. 29 

meeting with prayer ; and then^ after reading a 
chapter from the Bible, and addressing them for 
a few moments, he left the meeting open for all 
who wished to take part in it. 

One would lead in prayer ; and when he had 
finished, another would begin singing some 
familiar hymn, and the others would join him. 
A Christian would have a few words of exhorta- 
tion or experience. An inquirer would tell his 
feelings, or ask for prayers. And so the precious 
hour would pass ; and God blessed those meet- 
ings to the salvation of souls, in an almost un- 
interrupted revival of many months. 

At one time the wards were nearly full of 
very' sick and wounded men. The convales- 
cents, who were able, had all been sent to their 
regiments. Our leader had gone, among the 
rest, and we knew of no one among the new- 
comers to take his place. 

'^ You will have to take the leader's chair to- 
night,'' I told the corporal. 

" Oh, no ! I cannot do it. I am not fit. I 
never did such a thing in my life.'' 

" ^ My grace is sufficient,' ^ my strength made 

281 



30 INQUIRER HALTING 

perfect in thy weakness/ ^ ' If any of you lack 
wisdom, let him ask of God.'^ ^Ask, and it 
shall be given you/^ 

'' You know ivliere to go for help. We can- 
not give up our meeting to-night, brother/^ 

And so he took the chair, and voluntarily 
filled it, whenever it was necessary, until he left 
the hospital, about six months afterwards. 

Very earnestly he used to plead with his im- 
penitent comrades, both in the reading-room 
and the prayer-meeting, to ^^come to Jesus 

"When I look back over my past life,^' he 
said, in the meeting one night, " it makes me 
bitterly regret that I did not come to Jesus 
sooner. My greatest sorrow is that I have 
wasted so much of my life, — that I let so much 
of it pass before I received Him as my Sa- 
viour. 

'' I tried to get pleasure out of the world ; 
but it did not satisfy me. I have known more 
real ha2)piness in these last few months than I 
did in the whole of my life before. Do not 

1 2 Gor. 12 : 9. 2 j^^^^ 1.5, 3 L^^^e H : 9. 

282 



A.T REPENTANCE AND FAITH. 31 

stay away from that dear Saviour another day, 
comrades who have not found Him yet. There 
is no need. He is waiting to welcome you 
now. Oh^ taste, and see that the Lord is 
good, to-night! and you shall find peace and 
rest to your souls.^ 



283 



;; 



THE 



INQUIRER UNCONSCIOUSLY UNWILLING. 



THE 



INQUIRER UNCONSCIOUSLY UNWILLING. 



The Rev. W had appointed a meeting 

for inquirers, in the chapel of the A Hos- 
pital, one afternoon; and, as he was providen- 
tially prevented from being with them, I went 
to meet them alone. 

I found quite a number waiting in the chapel ; 
among them, one who had been seeking Jesus 
for some time, but had not yet found Him. 

^^What is keeping you back from the Sa- 
viour, friend ? What is in your way to Him? 
do you knovv^ V^ 

"No: 1 cannot tell.'' 

"It must be something that you yourself 
have put there, or are keeping there; because 
Christ has taken every thing out of your way 

3 25 287 



4 THE INQUIRER 

that could hinder you from coming to Him. 
He has made the road perfectly clear and free 
to all who really want to go to Him. The 
trouble must be in your own heart : nothing 
outside of that can keep you back/ 

^' I don't know what it can be, then. I have 
prayed to Him a great deal, and read my Bible, 
and tried to do what it told me; and still I can- 
not find peace. Sometimes I am almost ready 
to give up in despair, I get so discouraged. '' 

'' Is there any sin lurking in your heart 
which you are still not willing to give up? 
Any habit which you may have contracted? 
Any interest, or desire, or plan, that you are 
not willing to lay at the feet of Jesus and give 
up for His sake, if they are against His will? 
Think a moment, and ask God to show you the 
truth by His Spirit.^' 

"No,'' he said, slowly, after a little silence. 
" I do not know of any thing that is keeping me 
back. I do not know of any thing that I would 
not be willing to give up, if I could only find 
peace and pardon. I have thought it all over 
a great many times, and tried to find out what 

288 



r 



UNCO]S'SCIOUSLY UNWILLING. 5 

was wrong ; but I am all in the dark yet. 
Sometimes I am afraid that I am not among 
God^s ^ elect/ — that I am foreordained to be 
damned, and there is no use for me to try to 
be saved.^^ 

And his despondent tone, and the look of 
deep dejection on his face, showed how deeply 
that thought troubled him. 

Oh, this deceitful, wicked heart of ours, trying 
to throw the blame of its own sin and unbelief 
on God ! Leading us, unconsciously, sometimes, 
through mazes of doubt and error, when we 
think we are sincerely seeking the way to 
Christ.^ 

Oh, arch-enemy of God and man ! I thought 
I was '' not ignorant of iiis devices,^^" as he went 
about seeking souls wandering and lost in the 
wilderness of sin ;^ but never until I came into 
the wards could I so clearly trace the hand that 
threw up ^^ stumbling-blocks^^ of every con- 
ceivable shape and size and color in the. way 
of sin-sick souls seeking the great Physician, in 
the way of captive souls seeking the Deliverer. 

1 Jer. 17 : 9. ^ 2 Cor. 2 : 11. ^ 1 Pet. 5 ; 8. 

289 



b THE INQUIRER 

He is never more formidable than when he 
comes to those whom his roaring^ might affright 
and put on their guard^ w^earing the garments 
of an angel of light/ and lays down before 
them a twisted truth (misquoted Scripture)^ to 
suit his purposes, and make them turn back or 
lose their way. 

When this device of his came to the light in 
any soul, oh, how I exulted in the thought that 
Christ had conquered Satan/ could do it still, 
and would bring off those whom he sought to 
entrap, more than conquerors in the end, if they 
themselves were only willing to trust in Him ! ^ 

'^ Yes : I know how that thought feels when 
w^e let it into the heart, poor friend ; but it is 
not a true thought. It is only a delusion of 
Satan, to keep you back from the Saviour. But 
Christ is stronger than the tempter, and Satan 
can have no power to hurt, unless there is a 
traitor inside of your own heart to help him. 
So the trouble is m yourself still. Let us try, 
God helping us, to find out what it is. 

1 1 Pet. 5:8. 2 2 Cor. 11 : 14. 3 Matt. 4 : 6. 

* Matt. 4 : 11. ^ Heb. 2 : 8-18. Rom. 8 : 37. 

290 



UNCONSCIOUSLY UNWILLING. 7 

'^ Do you think that you are really ivilling to 
become a Christian now^ friend ?^^ 

^^Why, yes, indeed I am/' And there was 
something of rejproach that I should doubt him, 
in the look he raised to my face. 

"When we talked before, we went over the 
different stumbling-blocks that were in your 
way then. Do any of those trouble you still?'' 

" 1^0 : I am perfectly satisfied about them. I 
scarcely ever think of them any more." 

"And you think that you are perfectly will-- 
ing to give yourself to Jesus, and to receive and 
trust in Him as your only Saviour ?" 

"Yes : I know I am." 

"Have you told God so?" 

"Yes, — more than once." 

"And wouldn't He tahe you f 

" I don't know," he said, sadly. " It seems 
not. At least, I have no reason to believe that 
He has done so." 

" Either one of two things is the case, friend. 
Either you have not really come to Jesus with 
your whole hearty although you may have thought 
that you were doing so, or else the Saviour has 

25- 291 



8 THE INQUIREH 

done in your case what He never, never did, and 
never, never will do, — that is, turn away any- 
poor soul that conies to Him to be saved. 
When Ave search for Him with our whole hearts, 
He says that we shall find Him.^ 

"While we read this, friend,'^ I said, taking 
a small " dedication-card'' out of my satchel, " I 
want you to pray, earnestly, ' Search me, O 
God, and know my heart; try me, and know 
my thoughts;' show me, by thy Spirit, what 
keeps me back, and ^ lead me in the way ever- 
lasting.' ^ 

"'I take God the Father to be mv God,'" I 
read. "That means that you are loiUing that 
He should rule over you, and reign in you, 
while you consent to do, be, and say only what 
He would wish to have you. AVould you be 
willing, with His help, to do this, do you 
think?" 

"Yes: I think I would." 

" ' I take God the Son to be my only Saviour.' 
That means that you are not to put the least 
dependence in your obedience, or in your own 

1 Jer. 29 : 13. ^ pg^^jj^ 139 . 23, 24. 

292 



UNCONSCIOUSLY UNWILLING. 9 

good works, or in any thing that you can do to 
make you acceptable to God; but are willing to 
throw away all dependence upon any thing but 
Christ and Him crucified, as your only hope of 
salvation, and trust in Him only. Would you 
be willing to do this, Christ helping you by 
His Spirits 

"Yes: I think I would." 

" ' I take God the Spirit to prepare me for 
heaven.^ If you receive the Holy Spirit into 
your heart, you must be willing, with His help, 
to turn out of that heart every thing that will 
grieve Him, — every sinful thought and imagi- 
nation that you used to take pleasure in ; for the 
Holy Spirit will not stay in the same heart with 
sinful thoughts and affections and desires which 
are willingly admitted and cherished there.^ 

"Would you be willing, do you think, with 
that Spirit^s help, to turn out every thing of the 
kind, and let the Spirit take and keep possession 
of your heart for Christ, from now to the end 
of your life?" 

" Yes : I think I would, with His help." 

1 1 Cor. 3 : 16, 17. 

293 



10 THE INQUIRER 

" ^ I take the word of God to be the rule of 
my life/ Now, the Bible is not simply some- 
thing to be read morning and evening, as a part 
of w^orship; or read a good deal on the Sabbath, 
simply as a part of our remembering the Sab- 
bath day to keep it holy, and then let what we 
read slip from our mind for the rest of the 
time; but it is God's ^orders' to us, which He 
requires us to obey, and for which He will call 
us to account if we do not obey them. Its 
teachings are to be jmt into practice^ in our daily 
lives, just as much as you put your day's lesson 
in ' tactics' into exercise in your daily ' drill.' ^ 

'^ Let us see what are some of its rules. ' I 
say unto you,' says Christ,^ ' Love your enemies, 
bless them that curse you, do good to them that 
hate you, and pray for them which despitefuUy 
use you and persecute you.' 

'' Now, the Bible really means what it says. 
Do you think you would be willing to put that 
rule into practice ?" 

"I could try; but that is something pretty 

1 James 1 : 22. Rom. 2 : 13. Matt. 7 : 21. 

2 Matt. 5 : 44. 
294 



UNCONSCIOUSLY UNWILLING. 11 

hard to do — to love and do good to any one who 
hates. you and treats you badly /^ 

" Yes, it is hard^ friend ; but it must be done, 
or we ourselves cannot be forgiven.^ It is so 
hard that only the grace of God in the heart 
can enable any one to do it.^ But God will give 
that grace, and the Holy Spirit, to help every one 
who is really willing to obey Him/^^ 

We went over some more of God's ^^ rules,'^ 
and their application to our daily lives. 

^^Yvould you be willing, with God's help, to 
try to submit to and obey them all, from now to 
the end of your life ?'' 

''Yes: I think I would.'' 

'' ' I give myself up to Jesus, soul and body, 
all that I have and all that I am, both for time 
and for eternity.' " 

And then we talked over what that ''giving 
up" meant, and what it involved. 

" Do you think you would be perfectly will- 
ing, with your whole heart, to do that now, 
friend?" 

"Yes : I think, God helping me, I would." 

" 1 Matt. 6 : 15. ^ -^^^^ 7 . 23-25. 3 2 Cor. 12 : 9. 

295 



12 THE INQUIRER 

" God will help you, if you really desire it. 
He says^ that earthly parents are not so willing 
to give good gifts to their children as He is to 
give the Holy Spirit to them that ask it. 

"Ask Him earnestly to help you by that Spirit 
now ; and if you can, sincerely, with your whole 
heart, so give yourself up to Jesus, and receive 
and trust in Him as your only Saviour, we 
will kneel down^us^ lierc, 7io?i;, and tell Him so. 
There is no need for waiting another hour. 

" But remember, friend, that it is a very, very 
solemn thing to do this. You are coming into the 
presence of the heart-searching God. Nothing 
is hidden from His eye.^ It is a fearful thing to 
come into His presence with a falsehood on our 
lips, — consenting with our lips to a ' covenant^ 
which the heart does not ratify. We cannot 
deceive God. Let us pray earnestly for His 
Spirit, to keep us from deceiving ourselves, and 
to show us our hearts as He sees them, when we 
come into His presence now.'' 

He knelt down with me; and when I had 
finished, his face was hidden in his hands; but 

1 Luke 11 : 13. ^V^^\n\ 139. 

296 



UNCONSCIOUSLY UNWILLING. 13 

I could see that he was struggling with some 
strong emotion. I waited in silent prayer for 
him until he was calm. 

^^Now, you, friend." 

He began by thanking God for His goodness 
to him; but when he came to speak words of 
solemn self-dedication, he stopped in the middle 
of the first sentence, — waited a moment, — and 
then sprang to his feet. 

" I can't !'' And he sat down, leaning his face 
on his hands, on the back of the seat before 
him. 

What glimpse of his own heart God gave to 
that poor, tempest-tossed soul, in that hour, I 
do not know. 

What secret sin cherished still — what self- 
deception^^ — was exposed to his own eye, I never 
asked him. It was enough that the Spirit, in 
doing its own office-work,^ had showed him his 
true state, and made him feel sorrow and shame 
before God, as he sat there, apparently uncon- 
scious of my presence, or of any thing around 
him. 



1 John 16 : 8, 9. 



297 



14 THE INQUIRER 

How muck I longed to speak a word of com- 
fort ! but I dared not do it now, lest his '^ hurt" 
should be ^^ healed lightly'^ by " saying, Peace, 
peace, when there was no peace." ^ And I knew 
(oh, how gladly !) that for him there was a ^^ balm 
in Gilead," and a wise Physician there,^ who 
would Himself^ apply the healing ointment in 
His own good time. 

He was the last one I had to talk to. Some 
of the others had gone back to their wards; 
but several were still in the reading-room — I 
could see — through the folding-doors, open be- 
tween it and the chapel. 

I waited until it was time for me to go home, 
and let him listen in silence to the ^^ still small 
voice" ^ that was teaching him more than any 
words of man could do. 

^^I have done this, friend," I said, at last, 
^^ more for the sake of letting you get a true 
glimpse of your own heart, than for any other 
reason. 

If you had really been willing, God would 



a 



1 Jer. 6 : 14. 2 je^. 8 : 22. ^ pgalm 147 : 3. 

* 1 Kings 19 : 12. 
298 



UXCOXSCIOUSLY UNWILLING. 15 

have accepted and pardoned you in any mo- 
ment of these troubled weeks; but you were 
not willing, although I have no doubt that you 
honestly thought that you were. The trouble 
was in your own hearty friend, although you did 
not know it ; because, if you were only really Avill- 
ing to come to Jesus, there is no power on earth 
or in hell strong enough to keep you from Him. 

'' Christ is stronger than sin and Satan, and 
can, and will, draw you away from the strongest 
power of both, if you will only let Him. 

"What it is that has kept you back, stum- 
bling among thorns, so long, — is keeping you 
back now, — God knows, has known all the time, 
and perhaps is showing you now, too. 

"I will leave you alone with Him, friend. 
He only can help you.^ He stands waiting to 
help you at this moment, — ^dear Redeemer, pre- 
cious, loving Saviour ! — reaching out His arms 
of love, and saying, ^ All things are now ready ;^' 
come and be saved ;^ come and find rest.'"^ 

"Do not grieve His Spirit^ by waiting an- 

1 Acts 4 : 12. 2 j^y^Q 14 . 17^ 3 jg^. 45 : 22. 

* Matt. 11 : 2S. ^ Eph. 4 : 30. 

20 299 



16 THE INQUIRER 

other hour; but go to Him, just as you are, 
and ask Him to take out of your heart what- 
ever is keeping you from Him, and make you 
one of His own dear children now, and He will 
doit."- 

While I waited in the aisle a few moments 
after the prayer-meeting closed, the next even- 
ing, to speak to some of my boys who had stood 
up for prayers, I saw him go past me in the 
crowd ; but as I was passing out I found him 
waiting in the reading-room, to speak with me 
a moment. 

^^You were right,'^ he said, reaching out his 
hand as I came up to him. ^^You told the 
truth when you said I was not willing. I can 
see that now, although I really believed at the 
time that I was.'^ 

'' But you are willing noivf^ 

"Yes, — thank God, — I liope I am.'' 

"And you have told Jesus so?'' 

"Yes," he said, earnestly; "I have." . 

"And you feel that He has accepted and par- 
doned you ?" 

^ John G : 37. 



UNCOis^SCIOUSLY UNWILLING. 17 

I scarcely needed to ask that question^ as I 
looked into the almost transfigured face before 
me, and saw in it that " light'^ which the dear 
.Redeemer brought down from heaven to blinded, 
ruined man ; ^ — a light so pure, so peaceful, so 
glad, so different from any other ^4ight,^^ that 
I had learned to recognize its first appearance, 
almost without the help of words. 

How dearly I loved to watch its dawning in 
a face, as the heart received the ^^oil of joy for 
mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit 
of heaviness,^^ ^ or to look upon it as I did now, 
— lighting up every feature with its newly-found 
hope and joy! ^ 

^^Yes, — dear Saviour! — I hiow that He has. 
I feel it in my lieart,^^ 

And as long as he remained within the reach 
of my knowledge, I never had the slightest 
reason to think that he was mistaken. 

Not loiUing! Here is the secret ^^Achan^^** 
that brings so many troubles into the camp of 
the sin-sick heart of one who has been taught 

1 John 1 : 4-9. 1 John 2 : 8. John 8 : 12. 

2 Psalm 61 : 3. ^ ^^^^ 3 . 1(3^ 4 Joshua 7. 

301 



18 INQUIRER UNCONSCIOUSLY UNWILLING. 

the way of life, — the disguised traitor within 
the fort that helps Satan to smuggle in 
thoughts of th^ '^unpardonable sin/^ '^sinned 
away the day of grace/^ " not among the elect/^ 
" foreordained to be damned/^ and all the 
host of things that keep inquiring souls away 
from the Saviour, stumbling and bruised, until 
they are almost ready to give up in despair. 

Not willing ! Poor, troubled soul groping 
in darkness so long ! It is only you who are 
not willing to come to Jesus, although you 
may think that you are; and Satan who is 
not willing to let you escape from his clutches 
and fly beyond his reach to kill, and find 
safety and rest in the outstretched arms of a 
Redeemer's love. 

God is only not willing that you should keep 
away from Him and perish.^ 

^^Ye will not come to me,'' pleads that dear 
Redeemer,^ '^ that ye might have life." '' Whoso- 
ever will, let him take the water of life freely." 



1 Ezek. 18 : 23, 32. 

2 John 5 : 40. 


2 Pet. 3 : 9. 
3 Rev. 22 : 17. 



302 



THE 



INQUIRER 

UNDER THE BURDEN OF HIS SINS 

sow TO "COME TO JESUS." 



26* 



THE INQUIRER 

UNDER THE BURDEN OF HIS SINS, 

HOW TO "COME TO JESUS.'^ 



I HEARD some one moaning, as if in extreme 
pain, before I opened the door of Ward 3 ; and, 
when I came in, I saw that the sound pro- 
ceeded from one of the middle rows of cots, from 
a bed partly hidden by a pillar near the lower 
end of the ward, which had been unoccupied on 
my last visit ; and, as I glanced around, I saw 
several new faces on cots nearer to me. 

^^ Where did these men come from? And 
who is that moaning on cot No. 50 V' I asked 
a wounded soldier. 

^^ There was a railroad-accident a few miles 

3 305 



4 UNDER THE BURDEN OF SIN 

below this, the other day. The Regiment 

was on the train, on its w'ay to the field, and 
several were killed. They brought the wounded 
soldiers on here. Two of them died yester- 
day, and ' 'No. 50' is so badly hurt that they are 
afraid that he will die.'' 

After a little time, I stepped noiselessly to 
the head of cot ^^ No. 50," and stood for a mo- 
ment looking at its occupant. 

He was a large, strongly-built man, I could 
see, with the blood from his wounded shoulder 
oozing through the white sheet. 

He had been stricken down in a moment, in 
full health, and laid upon that bed of pain. His 
eyes w^ere partly closed ; but the incessant moan- 
ing — breaking into a groan at times, as the 
muscles of his face would quiver with a new 
pang — showed me that he was only too conscious 
of his suiferings. 

I took a handkerchief from my satchel, and, 
bending over him, wiped the great drops from 
his brow. 

^^ Poor brother ! — oh^ poor brother P^ 

Something in the tone, perhaps, touched a 

306 



HOW TO COME TO JESUS. 5 

chord of ^^ home ;'^ for, as he looked up quickly 
into my face, his eyes filled with tears. 

" Do you love Jesus ? Are you a Christian V^ 
" No ! oh, no !^^ he moaned : " that is the trouble. 
I have sinned against God all my life, and now 
He has cut me down in my sins. Oh, if I only 
could live my life over again ! I knew my 
duty, but I would not do it. I always meant 
to be a Christian some day; but it is too late 
now. God says, ^ He that being often reproved 
hardeneth his heart, shall suddenly be destroyed, 
and that without remedy.^ '^ 

^^ There is a remedy, dear friend: Jesus " 

"Yes, I know. I do pray to Him; but He 
won't hear me. He says, ^ I will laugh at your 
calamity: I will mock when your fear cometh.' 
I never did believe in death-bed repentance; 
and now it is too late for me ! Oh, if I only 
w^as a Christian, I wouldn't care to die; but 
how can I go up before God, with all my sins 
upon me?'' 

For the careless and the caviller, plain, earnest 
words, kindly sjjoJcen, to show them their sin 
and danger ; but with those who are sincerely 

307 



6 UNDER THE BUHDEN OF SIN 

seeking Jesus, sorrowing because they cannot 
find Him; or with a poor wounded soul like 
this, writhing under the terrors of the law^ 
trembling at the foot of Sinai ; gently^ oh, so 
gently, after the manner of Him Avho would 
"not break the bruised reed, or quench the 
smoking flax/'^ 

" Listen to me, friend,^^ I said, coming around 
and sitting down by the side of his low cot. 
" Jesus loves you, — loved you well enough to die 
for you.^ He pities you.^ He has suffered more 
than you ever can suffer.^ He know^s how you 
feel.^ Dear Jesus! — He was a wounded man, — 
w^ounded to death for you.^ Only think how 
much Pie must have loved you, when He hung 
upon the cross for your sake, hands and feet 
pierced through with iron spikes, and that dear 
head pierced with its crown of thorns/ 

" Only think how much you would need to 
love any one before you would be willing to 
suffer what you do from your one wound only, 

1 Matt. 12 : 20. ^ j^j^^^ 15 . 13^ p^^^^ 5 . g.g, 

3 Psalm 103 ; 13. ^ Luke 22 : 44. ^ Heb. 4 : 15. 
6 Isa. 53 : 5. 1 Pet. 2 : 24. ^ Mark 15 : 19. 

308 



HOW TO COME TO JESUS. 7 

for their sake ; but Christ was first beaten, His 
body torn with the scourge, until He was too 
weak to carry His cross, and then they nailed 
Him to the Cross, pierced through both hands 
and both feet with burning, festering wounds.^ 

" Here, you have those who care for you and 
try to help you ; there, cruel men stood around, 
and watched His sufferings, and mocked Him,^ 
their God ! 

" Think what He must have suffered through 
all those long hours ! Suffered for you and me, 
— dear Jesus, blessed Saviour ! how can we help 
loving Him for it? — suffered until His heart 
broke with agony, even before they pierced it.^ 

'' How much He must have loved you, friend, 
to endure all that for your sake ! How can you 
think that He will turn away from hearing you 
nowf' 

"Oh, yes," he moaned, ^^I know. I have 
known about Him ever since I was a child; and 

that is Vv'hat makes it so much worse now. I 

» . 

1 Matt. 27 : 26-51. Mark 15 : 15-38. Luke 23 : 24-47. 
John 19. 

2 Matt. 27 : 20, 41, 44. ^ JqI,,^ xg . 34, 1 jo].j^ 5 . g. 



8 UNDER THE BURDEN OF SIN 

have sinned against Him all my life. Oh, how 
I have treated Him ! and it is too late to turn to 
Him now." 

" Listen, friend. On another cross, beside 
Jesus, that day, there hung a robber, — a man 
who was worse than you, — a man who was 
so wicked that he was put to death for his 
crimes ; and he turned to Jesus, and the Saviour 
pardoned him, even in that hour.^ 

" So will He pardon you, if you turn to Him. 
He is able and willing to ' save even to the utter- 
most'^ all who come to Him, even at the 
eleventh hour.^ 

'' ' Come, now, and .-let us reason together,' 
He says : ^ ' though your sins be as scarlet, they 
shall be as wdiite as snow ; though they be red 
like crimson, they shall be as wool.' 

^^^Let the wicked forsake his way, and the 
unrighteous man his thoughts: and let him 
return unto the Lord, and He will have mercy 
upon him ; and to our God, for He wdll abun- 
dantly pardon.' ^ ' The blood of Jesus Christ His 

1 Luke 23 : 39-44. Kev. 2:7. ^ ^eb. 7 : 25. 

3 Matt. 26 : 6, 7. * Isti. 1 : 18. ^ j^^. 55 : 7. 

aio 



HOW TO COME TO JESUS. 9 

Son/ shed for you on Calvary, ^cleanseth from 
all sin/ ^ 

^^^Tliis is a faithful saying, and worthy of 
all acceptation, that Jesus Christ came into the 
world to save sinners, of whom,^ says Paul,^ ^ I 
am chief/ 

'' Paul stood by and took care of the clothes 
of those vdio stoned Stephen,^ consenting unto 
his death/ 

" He had persecuted God's people, dragging 
many of them to prison ;^ and yet God forgave 
him. He never said to any one, ' Seek ye me in 
vain.'^ 

'' Don't you remember how the sick, and the 
afflicted, came to that dear Saviour, while He 
was upon the earth, and ^He healed them all'?^ 
He never turned away one poor suffering body 
that came to Him to be healed of its diseases; 
much less will He turn away any poor, sin-sick 
soul that comes to Him for pardon. He is the 
same kind, loving, merciful Saviour to-day that 

1 1 John 1:7. ^1 Tim. 1 : 15. ^ ^cts 7 : 58. 

^ Acts 22 : 20. ^ Acts 8:3. « Isa. 45 : 19. 
7 Matt. 4 : 23. Matt. 12 : 15. 

27 311 



10 UNDER THE BURDEN OF SIN 

He was then ; and He says/ ' Him that cometh 
unto mc I will in no wise cast out/^ 

" He sees you, He hears you, He pities you 
now; and He Avill pardon your sins and save 
you now, — oh, how gladly! — if you will only 
receive Him as your Saviour and give yourself 
to Him. He has pledged His solemn promise 
to do that, and sealed that promise with His 
blood.^ 

^^You are suffering too much to talk any 
more now; it is not best for you; but you must 
pray to God as you lie here. Tell Him just 
how you feel. Take all your sins to Jesus, and 
ask Him to wash you from them and make you 
clean ; and He will do it.^ 

"Ask Him to give you His Holy Spirit to 
help you to turn to Him and be saved. 

" We will ask Him together, now, for soul and 
body too; and then, when I go away, you must 
ask Him for yourseWV^ 

"Will you pray for me when you go home, 
too f^ he asked, as I rose to leave. 

1 Heb. 13 : 8. ' ^ j^j^n 6 : 37. 

3 Heb. 9 : 12, 15. ^ Jer. 33 : 3, 8. 

312 



now TO COME TO JESUS. 11 

'' Yes : I will take your name/^ I said, copy- 
ing it into my book from the card at the head 
of his bed. 

'^ I know that God knows it, — will know who 
I mean ; but I always like to talk to Him of my 
men by their names. But you must pray to 
Him for yourself, too. There is but one Medi- 
ator between God and man, the Lord Jesus} 

'^ There is only One^ who can leadyoxx to Him, 
— the Holy Spirit.^ Ask God to give you that 
Spirit to help you to give yourself up to Jesus 
and receive Him as your Saviour, and He will 
doit.'^^ 

I did not hear him moaning when I visited 
the ward again ; and they told me that he was 
better. 

The head of his cot was nearest to the door; 
and, as I always stepped quietly around through 
the w^ards, and spoke in low tones, he was not 
aware of my presence until I stood beside him. 

1 1 Tim. 2:5. 2 ^p^. 1 ; 17^ 18, 19. ^ L^^g 11 : 13. 
■^' Men may point the sinner to Jesus, and show him the 
way (and it is their duty to do so) ; but the Holy Spirit 
only can lead him to the Saviour.^ 

1 John 16 : 7-15. John 1 : 12. 

313 



12 UNDER THE BURDEN OF SIN 

^^Pray for nie^ won't you?'' he asked, the 
moment he saw me. 

'^ Have you been praying for yourself, friend ?'' 

" Yes : I have tried ; but I can't feel that 
God hears me." 

'' Perhaps your pain distracts your mind." 

^' No : my mind is as clear and strong as it 
ever was; and I almost forget my pain, some- 
times, I am in such trouble." 

" Do you have a feeling that you are getting 
better now, and there is not such great need to 
be in earnest ?" 

" No : I know there is need." 

'^ Do you have a feeling that, if you do not 
get well, you want to be a Christian noWj but 
if you are to live for years yet, you would like 
to spend some more of them for the world first ? 
Look closely into your heart, and see if there is 
such a feeling there." 

'' No : if I know my own heart, I want to be 
a Christian now, whether I live or die. And 
my sins are the only things that trouble me 
now. 

"God's Spirit has so many times almost per- 

3U 



HOW TO COME TO JESUS. 13 

suaded me to be a Christian, and I have driven 
it away. I am afraid it has left me. I am 
afraid I have sinned away my day of grace, or 
committed the unpardonable sin, and there is no 
mercv for me.'^ 

" Does the thought trouble you ?" 

"Yes: I can get no rest or peace for it. It 
troubles me so that I am almost ready to give 
up in despair.'' 

"A man who dies in his sins has sinned away 
his ^day of grace.' ^ A man who resists the 
Spirit to the last moment of his life, has com- 
mitted the unpardonable sin, because he refused 
to listen to, and fought against, the Holy Spirit, 
— the only One who can lead him to the Sa- 
viour;^ but, until that hour comes, no one can 
know that he himself, or any one else, has 
done so. 

" I have known a great many who thought 
that they had committed the unpardonable sin ; 
and, as far as I can remember, they every one 
became Christians (I cannot remember one, now, 
that did not) ; and they found that it had only 

1 Eccl. 9 : 10. 2 Qen. 6 : 3. Eph. 2 : 18. 

27- ^5 



14 UNDER THE BURDEN OF SIN 

been a delusion of Satan and their own deceit- 
ful hearts, to keep them from the Saviour. 

'' Why, friend, God's Spirit is striving with 
you now ! It is that which is showing you your 
heart. If it had left you, you would have no 
more convictions of sin. 

"You need have tw fear of having sinned 
away your day of grace, as long as you have one 
troubled thought on the subject; because it is 
God's Spirit only that puts such a troubled 
thought into your heart; and that Spirit comes 
directly from God to you, showing you that He 
is still waiting to be gracious,^ and is trying, by 
it, to draw you to the Saviour.^' 

" Since I have lain here, it seems to me that 
every sin I ever committed in my life, has come 
up before me. It seems to me I have done no- 
thing but sin. Oh, I didn't think that I was 
such a sinner !'' 

" I am so glad, friend ! — not glad that you are 
a sinner, but because you know it. You w^ere 
just as great a sinner before; only you did not 
feel it. And until a man feels that he is sick, 

1 Isa. 30 : 18. 
316 



HOW TO COME TO JESUS. 15 

he will not send for a physician. Until he feels 
his sins^ he will not seeh the Saviour.^ 

^' The greater sinner you are, the more you 
need the Saviour. It was just such sinners as 
you and I that Jesus came to save. He came 
to seek and to save that which was lost? 

^' Give yourself up to Him, soul and body, 
now, and He will save you. ^Come unto me, 
all ye that labour and are heavy laden,^ He 
says,^ ^ and I will give you rest.' '^ 

^' But Jwic am I to ^ come to Jesus' ? Tell me/' 
And his tone was so earnest that there was 
almost a command in it. ^^ That is just what I 
want to do," he added, pleadingly, "and I don't 
know howJ^ 

I never feel so weak, so ignorant, so utterly 
empty of all knowledge and power and wisdom, 
as when some poor, sin-sick soul looks up into 
my face, and asks, " How am I to come to Jesus ?" 

Faith is so simple, so very simple, and yet so 

intangible. It is so hard to put that act of faith 

which unites us to Christ, into words. (If, 

after all, we can put it into words.) 

1 Matt. 9 : 12, 18. ^ Matt. 18 : 11. ^ Matt. 11 : 28. 

317 



16 UNDEE THE BURDEN OF SIN 

Never more earnestly than at such a moment 
as that, goes up the cry, ^^ Lord, help me now, 
for thine own nanle's sake ! Put thy Spirit into 
tlie words; for, without that, they must fall to the 
ground/^ ^ 

" Jesus says to you, friend, ^ Look to me, and 
be saved.' ^ ^ Come to me, and I will give you 
rest/^ 'Believe on the Lord Jesus, and thou 
shalt be saved.' ^ 

"^ Looking,^ and ^coming,' and ^believing,' 
all mean the same thing. It is to trust, to have 
faith in Christ. And when I say, ' Give yourself 
to Jesus,' I mean just the same thing too. I 
will tell you why I say, ' give.' 

"You would need to have a great deal of 
faith in this comrade on the next cot, or in the 
best and truest and greatest friend that you 
have on earth, to be perfectly ivilling that he 
should have full power over that right hand 
of yours, — to let him cut it off if he chooses ; 
to say what you shall do with it, or what you 
shall not do with it ; to give away to him the 

1 1 Cor. 3:6. ^ ig^. 45 : 22. 

3 Matt. 11 : 28. ^ Acts 16 : 31. 

318 



HOW TO COME TO JESUS. 17 

whole power over every finger and every 
muscle of it, from now to the end of your life : 
wouldn^t you V 

''Yes: I would so/' 

^^You would need to have a great deal of 
faith in him, to be willing to give away to him 
the full power over both hands and both arms, 
to the end of your life : wouldn^t you ?'' 

^^Yes: indeed I would/' 

^^You would need to have a great deal of 
faith in him, to be willing to give him the 
whole control over both of your feet; to 
cripple them with pain, if he pleased ; to keep 
them forever in one place, if he pleased ; or, 
make you use them when he pleased; to not 
move them one step, without his permission ; 
to keep them, if he chose, from carrying, you 
one step, even to a place where you wanted to 
go ; to cut them both off, at any moment, if he 
pleased. 

^^You would need to have a great deal of 
faith in him, to be willing to give him the 
whole power over your feet, to the end of your 
life : wouldn't you ?" 

319 



18 UNDER TPIE BURDEN OF SIN 

"Yes: I would so.'^ 

"You would need to have a great deal of 
faith in him before you would be willing to 
give him the control of your tongue; to let him 
say when you should speak, or when you should 
not speak, or what you should say, or whether 
you should never speak another word to the 
end of your life. 

"Or to give him the control of your eyes; to 
strike them blind at any moment, or only to 
open them when he pleased. 

" Or to give him full, perfect, and entire con- 
trol over your whole body, as to whether you 
should live, or die, or what you should do with 
yourself. 

" Will yourself aioay to him (as it were), out 
of your own hands, into his, from this day to 
the day of your death. Wouldn't you f^ 

"Yes, indeed: I should think I would.'' 

"You would need to have more faith in him 
yet, to be perfectly willing that he should have 
full, perfect, and entire control over your mind; 
as to what and when you should think, and 
how you should use every mental faculty that 

320 



HOW TO COME TO JESUS. 19 

God has given you ; or whether you should 
have the right use of your reason, or be crazed 
at any moment, like some you have seen. 
Wouldn't you f^ 

"Yes: indeed I would.'^ 

" And suppose that he should want your soul. 
You would need to have a very great deal of 
faith in him before you would be perfectly 
willing to put that into his sole care; let him 
have the charge of its whole interests, for time 
and for eternity; trust it with him, fully and 
contentedly; give every thought and care 
of its eternal welfare into his hands; will 
it entirely into his keeping, and trust, with- 
out one doubt, to his promise (if you knew 
that he had the power) that he would take it 
safely into heaven when you died.^ Wouldn't 
you?'' 

"Yes, indeed: I should think I would J^ 

"Now, that is just what Jesus wants you to do. 
Give your whole self, soul and body, for time 
and for eternity, into His hands, to do with them 
just what He pleases. 

1 Heb. 11 : 1. 

321 



20 UNDER THE BUKDEN OF SIN 

^^ Take that very same faiili^ that you would 
need to have in any man whom you would be 
willing to trust in this way, raise it up high 
above every thing else, and fix it on Christ. 

^^Give your full, sincere, and entire consent 
to be His; to be and to do only what He 
pleases, both in this world and the next, and 
trust Him, implicitly, with soul and body too. 

"Whenever you are perfectly willing, with 
your whole heart, to do this, and tell Him so, 
sincerely, then you do have faith in Christ. 
Then you do ^look^ to Christ for salvation. 
Then you do ' come' to Him and find eternal 
life. Then you do ' belong to Christ,' or are a 
^ Christian.^ Then you do ' believe' on the Lord 
Jesus. And in that moment, God, for Christ's 
sake, pardons all your sins, and makes you 
clean in His sight, and saves you from the 



■^ Faith (saving faith) in God is just the same hind of faith 
as the highest faith we can place in man ; only the object is 
different. It would not be wise to trust any man in the 
way we have spoken ; but it is the highest wisdom to trust 
in, and rely on, and have faith in, the 'perfect and Omni- 
'potent God, to an infinite extent, to the utmost extent of 
His promises. 
322 



HOW TO COME TO JESUS. 21 

punishment of your sins; because Christ says/ 
^ Verily^ verily, I say unto you, He that hear- 
eth my word, and believeth on Him that sent 
me, hath everlasting life, and shall not come into 
condemnation; but is passed from death unto 
life,^ and is saved. Is that plain ?'^ 

^^Yes; but if I only could think that He 
would take me. I am such a sinner/^ 

" Somebody (Baxter, I think it was) said, ' If 
I should see it written down by God^s hand, 
'^If Richard Baxter comes to me, he shall be 
saved,^^ I might think that there was some 
other Richard Baxter in the world, and that 
God meant him. I could not feel perfectly sure 
that He meant me. But when I see it written in 
Gt)d's Word, "Him,^^ ''whosoever wiU, let him 
come/^^ '' Him,^^ whosoever " cometh, I will in 
no wise cast out/^^ ^^He'^ (whoever it be) 
''that believeth shall be saved ;'^^ — why, then 
I'm " whosoever.^' ' " 

" But how am I to know it V' 

"Your physician told me to-day that your 

1 John 5 : 24. ^ j^ev. 22 : 17. John 7 : 37. 
3 John 6 : 37. * Mark 16 : 16. 

28 323 



22 UNDER THE BURDEN OF SIN 

greatest danger was past, and that he thought, 
with care, you would recover now. Do you 
believe that he told me that ?^^ 

^^Yes: Ido.'^ 

^^ Suppose that you should say, when I told 
you that he said so, ' But how am I to know it V 
Don^t you see you would be dishonouring me 
by doubting my word ? 

^^ So, you must just simply ^a^e GodCs word 
for what He tells you, friend. 

" You are not able to write to your friends. 
Would you like to have me write to them for 
youf' 

'^ Yes : I would be very glad if you would.^^ 

" If God permits, I will write to them to- 
night, giving them your address, and telling 
them to write to you. Do you believe that I 
will do so?'' 

" Yes : when you promise to.'' 

" Now, you know nothing of me, except what 
you have seen, or others may have told you; 
and the letter may miscarry ; but, still, could 
you rest contented that, as far as it was in my 
power, your friends should hear, from you? 

324 



HOW TO COME TO JESUS. 23 

And would you be expecting a letter from 
them when it was time for you to receive the 
answer f^ 

^^Yes: I would/' 

'' So, we must simply toJce God at His wordy 
and trust His promise that He will save us. 
His promises never fail.^ He has all power to 
keep His promises. No power on earth, or in 
hell, can prevent Him from doing so.^ 

'' Suppose that you had lost all of your pro- 
perty, and were in debt for more than you ever 
could pay, and were every moment expecting the 
officers to come and take you to prison. 

" You had a friend who was abundantly able 
to help you, and he could not deceive you. 
You had treated him very badly ; but still you 
hoped that he would take pity on you in your 
trouble; and you had applied to him, and were 
waiting for his answer. 

" Suppose that, as you sat in your room, in 
suspense, tormented by your fears, that friend 
should not come to you in person, but should 
send a ^witness' to you, — a messenger, whom 

12 Cor. 1:20. ^ Daniel 4 : 35. 

325 



24 UNDER THE BURDEN OF SIN 

you knew came from him, and could not lie, to 
tell you ' not to be the least troubled, — that he 
loved you, and was able and willing to help 
you, and would take all your debt upon himself, 
and satisfy your creditors and let you go free/ 

" Could you trust that promise, so as to throw 
away all your trouble and be glad ?^^ 

^^Yes: I would be glad/^ 

^' NoAv, if we receive the ^ witness' of men, the 
wdtness of God is greater,'' ^ God's ^ witness,' ^ the 
Holy Spirit, is in your heart now, convincing 
you of sin and drawing you to Jesus, and show- 
ing you by that, that the Saviour is willing to 
save you. 

" Jesus has pledged His word to you, time 
and again, that He is willing, and will save you 
if you will only trust Him, and has sealed that 
pledge to you with His life.^ What more can 
you ask ?" 

" Oh, if I only could know that my sins were 
pardoned !" 

'' If Jesus should come down from heaven 

1 1 John 5:8. ^ i John 5 : 6, 8, 11. 

3 Heb. 9 : 23. Heb. 10 : 16, 17. 
326 



HOW TO COME TO JESUS. 25 

at this moment^ and stand beside your cot 
in bodily form, as He stood beside the man 
sick of the palsy/ and say to you, ' Son, be of 
good cheer, thy sins are all forgiven/ Would 
you believe Him?^^ 

"Yes: indeed I would/^ 

" If He should send an angel directly from 
heaven to you, with a special message from Him- 
self, telling you ^ not to be troubled, for He would 
forgive you, that He loved jon^ and would takeyou 
safely into heaven when you died ;^ would you 
believe him, so as to feel glad and be at peace ?'^ 

"Yes : indeed I would so/^ 

"If He should send a letter with such a 
promise written in it, in His own handwriting, 
and repeated over and over again, as He dic- 
tated, and you had clear proofs — proofs which 
you could not doubt — that tlie letter came 
directly from Hwiy and that He had sent it 
directly to you, would you believe it, so as to 
trust in His promise, and put aAvay all this 
trouble about your sins from your mind, and 
rejoice and be at rest?" 

^ Matt. 9 : 2. 

28- 327 



26 UNDER THE BURDEN OF SIN 

^^Yes: indeed I would/' 

" Now, let me show you GodCs letter to you, 
friend, — the Mast Will and Testament' of the 
Lord Jesus Christ,^ written for you, sent directly 
to you," I said, holding up his Testament before 
him, as I pointed out to him some of the pas- 
sages we have already quoted, and some others. 

^^^ Verily, verily, I say unto you, He that 
believeth on me hath everlastins; life.'^ 

" ' Say not in thine heart,. Who shall ascend 
into heaven? that is, to bring Christ down 
from above' to you, so that you might see Him 
standing beside your cot, and hear His voice as 
He repeated His promises and invitations to you ; 
but, ' The word is nigh thee, even in thy mouth, 
and in thy heart; that is, the word of faith, which 
we preach ; 

" ' That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth 
the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart 
that God hath raised Him from the dead,' and 
thus that He can and will save you, ^ thou shalt 
be saved."' ^ 

1 Heb. 9. Heb. 12 : 24. ^ jo^n 6 : 47. 

3 Rom. 10 : 6-11. 

328 



HOW TO COME TO JESUS. 27 

^^ Is that all that I must do ?'' 

^^That is all, — just as simple as that. Be- 
lieving in Christ is simply taking Him at His 
word; having faith enough in Him to timst 
your soul and your body into His hands, for time 
and for eternity, without a fear, trusting in His 
promise that He will save you. 

" God^s Spirit is in your heart at this mo- 
ment, waiting to help you to do this. Could 
you do it now, do you think, with that Spirit's 
helpT 

"Yes: I think I could. Yes, God helping 
me, I wilV^ 

And so, if man could judge, or his own heart 
know, I trust he did. 

" That hand belongs to Jesus now, friend,'^ I 
said, long afterwards, as I talked with ftiftfor the 
last time, before he received his discharge and 
went home. (He could never do duty in the 
field again.) 

"Xever raise that hand against His laws. 
That tongue must speak for Him now. You 
have given mind and body to Him. Use them 
in His service. 

329 



28 HOW TO COME TO JESUS. 

" He has redeemed your souly I trust. It is 
His, And He has placed you on guard over it, 
under His care and with His Spirit's help. 
Never forget that ^your body is the temple of 
the Holy Ghost which is in you^ which ye have 
of God, and ye are not your own. 

" ^ For ye are bought with a price : therefore 
glorify God in your bodyy and in your spirit, 
which are God^s,^^^^ 

1 1 Cor. 6 : 19, 20. 1 Cor. 3 : 16, 17. 
330 2c2 



THE 



YOUNG CONVERT 



WEAT IT MEANS TO BECOME A CHRISTIAN, 



THE YOUNG CONVERT : 

WHAT IT MEANS TO BECOME A CHKISTIAN. 



^^I THOUGHT that this ward was nearly 
empty/^ I said^ as I came into ward No. 2 and 
found almost every bed occupied. 

^^So it was/^ said the nurse; ^^but they 
brought in twenty-nine of these new recruits 

from the regiment, to-day, sick with the 

measles/^ 

And sick enough they were, I saw, — too sick 
to talk much ; and so, with a few earnest words 
to each, and leaving some little tracts on the 
stands between their beds, I left them. 

The next week, w^hen I visited their ward, 
I found the most of them convalescent. One or 
two had died, and a few were still quite sick. 

While sitting on an empty cot, beside a sick 
soldier, talking to him of Jesus, a young, deli- 

3 333 



4 THE YOUNG CONVERT. 

cate-looking boy, who, by the stripes on his 
sleeves, I saw was a sergeant, sat down near us 
and listened. 

He was seeking Jesus, he told me, — had been 
for some time, — and was in trouble because he 
could not find Him ; and so we tried to show 
him the way to the Saviour. 

We (a young Christian friend who was very 
much interested in him, and myself) saw him 
several times after this. One time we would 
find him indulging a trembling hope that he 
had been forgiven; the next, troubled with 
doubts and fears, although we thought tliat we 
could discover in him many of tlie marks of a 
child of God. 

One cloudy afternoon I was sitting beside a 
sick boy-soldier, telling him " that sweet story 
of old,'^ when the little sergeant came into the 
ward, and presently came over and sat down 
beside us. 

He was in trouble again, I saw. 

"What is it, little brother f' I asked. "I 
thought that you told me, the last time, that 
you had with your whole heart received Jesus 

334 



WHAT IT MEANS TO BECOME A CHUISTIAN. 5 

as your Saviour, and given yourself to Him, 
and that you thought that He had accepted 
your 

^^ So I did ; and I do sometimes feel as if I 
really belonged to Him ; then, again, I am afraid 
to believe it, because I don't feel as I thought I 
should when I became a Christian/' 

^^You had it all marked out in your mind 
how you should feel both before and after the 
change, had you ?'' 

^^ Well, yes: I had/' 

^^You had read accounts of some wonderful 
conversions, and you had heard of others, and 
you thought tliat you must feel something like 
what those persons did, or else you were not 
right. Is that true ?" 

" Well, yes : I thought I should feel the 
change a great deal plainer and stronger than I 
did." 

'^ Let us see what God says about it," I said, 
taking a Testament from the stand near us, and 
turning to John 3 : 8. 

" The wind bloweth where it listeth, and thou 
hearest the sound thereof, but canst not tell whence 

29 335 



6 THE YOUNG CONVERT. 

it cometh and whither it goeth : so is every one 
that is born of the Spirit/^ 

'' Now, we do have ichirlwinds and hurricanes 
sometimes; but they are not common; and be- 
cause they are uncommon, men publish an ac- 
count of them, while a description of the com- 
mon breezes of every day is seldom published, 
because there is nothing strange or unusual 
about them : so that any one who knew nothing 
about our winds, except what he read in the 
papers, would think that we had scarcely any 
other kind than whirlwinds and hurricanes. 

^^So, God does sometimes convert men by 
extraordinary means, as He did St. Paul, and 
gives them extraordinary feelings, like some 
you have read about ; but that is not His com- 
mon way ; and because it is uncommon, an ac- 
count of it is written down, while the quiet 
conversions that are going on all around us are 
seldom written, because tliere is nothing extra- 
ordinary about them ; and so you are led to be- 
lieve that what you read is God's usual way of 
dealing with men, because any other kind is 
seldom printed. 

336 



WHAT IT MEANS TO BECOME A CHRISTIAN. 7 

" This ' change of heart/ which takes place 
when a man becomes a Christian^ is something 
so mysterious to the sinner^ that very often, when 
he gets to thinking about these things, he thinks 
that he must see strange sights, and hear strange 
sounds, and have such strong and strange feel- 
ings, when the change comes ; and that is very 
seldom true; and so he holds back from Christ, 
sometimes, waiting for them, and is troubled 
with doubts and fears, sometimes, even after he 
is forgiven, because he does not- feel exactly as 
he expected/^ 

" But, then, I have heard men tell their own 
experiences, too; and I don^t feel just as they 
did, either/^ 

" Neither could you, unless you could he those 
same men. You are not exactly like them in 
any thing ; you do not feel exactly like them in 
any matter; you could noty unless you could lose 
your identity in theirs. 

" If every man in this ward should become 
a Christian to-day, no two of them could have 
exactly the same feelings, because no two of 
them are exactly alike; and so the religious 

337 



8 THE YOUNG CONVERT. 

experience of no one man can be a true test of 
another^s. 

" God gives us jiist such an experience as He 
pleases, and such as He sees best that we should 
have; and we must be willing to take just what 
He gives lis. Some have stronger feelings, when 
the change comes; others, like the old Scotch- 
woman, can only say, ^ May -be the ivorld has 
changed ; may-be the Bible has changed ; may-be 
it^s me. Onyhow, there's a change somewhere^ 

^^But, although their ^experiences' are so 
varied, God's children all have a family resem- 
blance to each other, and to their Father. They 
love Him ;^ His house ;^ His day;^ His word.^ 
They love each other.^ They hate sin,^ and 
love that which is good;^ and they have that 
likeness given to them as soon as they are 
adopted into His family;^ and it grows stronger 
the longer they stay in it.^ 

^^Let us see what it means to become a 

1 Psalm 73 : 25. John 8 : 42. 2 Psalm 84 : 10. 

3 Isa. 58 : 13, 14. * Psalm 1 : 2. 

5 1 John 3 : 14. 1 John 5 : 1, 2. 6 pgalm 97 : 10. 
7 Psalm 119 : 127, 128. « 2 Cor. 5 : 17. 2 Cor. 3 : 18. 
9 Rom. 8. 
338 



WHAT IT MEANS TO BECOME A CHRISTIAN. 9 

Christian/^ I said, presently, as I saw that he 
was still not satisfied. 

" Two words are generally used to express it. 
^ Kegeneration/ ^ or being ^born again/ ^ or ^ born 
from above;' and ^ conversion/ ^ or ^turning.'* 

i Titus 3:5. 2 j^hn 3 : 3-9. ^ Matt. 18 : 3. 

^ '^Eegeneration is a spiritual change; conversion is a 
spiritual motion. In regeneration there is a power con- 
ferred ; conversion is the exercise of this power. In rege- 
neration there is given us a principle to turn ; conversion 
is our actual turning. In the covenant, God's putting His 
Spirit into us is distinguished from our walking in His 
statutes, from the first step we take in the way of God, and 
is set down as the cause of our motion. Ezek. 36 : 27. 

" In renewing us, God gives us a power ; in converting us, 
He excites that power. Men are naturally dead and have 
a stone upon them. Eegeneration is a rolling away the 
stone from the heart, and a raising to newness of life ; and 
then conversion is as natural to a regenerate man as motion 
is to a lively body. A principle of activity will produce 
action. In regeneration, man is wholly passive ; in con- 
version, he is active. The first reviving us is wholly the 
act of God, without any concurrence of the creature ; but 
after we are revived, we do actively and voluntarily live 
in His sight. Eegeneration is the motion of God in the 
creature; conversion is the motion of the creature to 
God, by virtue of that first principle : from this principle 
all the acts of believing, repenting, mortifying, quicken- 
ing, do spring. In all these a man is active ; in the other, 
he is merelv passive." — Charnock. 

29- 339 



10 THE YOUNG CONVERT. 

"You are, by nature, going away from God, 
— farther and farther every day,^^^ I said, 
drawing a line with my pencil on the blank 
page of a book I had in my hand. 




"Every sin adds to the distance;^ every sin 
takes you one step farther from God and life 
eternal, and one step farther on the road to 
death .^ ^Turn ye, turn ye; for why will ye 
die ?' God calls to you.^ ' Look unto me, and 
be ye saved,^ Christ pleads with you;^ and the 
moment you look to Christ, the moment you, 
with your whole heart, receive Christ as your 
only Saviour, and give yourself up to Him, you 
are ^ re-gener-ated,^ or ^born again,^ by God's 
Spirit.^ You are at the turning-pointy (^) And 
by the help of that Spirit you are converted, or 
turned right-about, with your face towards God.^ 

1 Isa. 53 : 6. Eom. 3 : 10-13. Eph. 2:3. 

2 Isa. 59 : 2. ^ ^^^^^^ n . 19, 4 Ezek. 33 : 11. 

5 Ezek. 45 : 22. John 3 ; 14-17. « John 1 : 12, 13. 
» Isa. 36 : 26, 27. 
340 



WHAT IT MEANS TO BECOME A CHEISTIAN. 11 

"Perhaps you have come to that ^turning- 
point^ so gradually that you cannot tell exactly 
the day or the hour in which you reached it. 
Perhaps you came to it so plainly and suddenly 
that you can tell almost the moment. 

" Perhaps God regenerated your heart so 
quietly that you cannot tell exactly the day or 
the hour when the change came ; perhaps you 
were conscious of it the moment it took place; 
but that regeneration is the work of a moment, 
because there is no medium between life and 
death : one moment you are spiritually dead, 
the next you are alive in Christ. And in that 
moment, God does not hill sin in your heart; but 
He forgives all that you have ever committed, 
and takes you out from under its government,^ 
and gives you a new power, — a power which 
you never had before, — to turn from sin to 
Himself;^ a power which He requires you to 
use every moment, as long as you live, in turn- 
ing away from sin to God.^ 

" The moment a man is ^ born again,' or be- 
comes a Christian, he is turned out of the road 

1 Eom. 6 : 14. 2 ^zek. 11 : 19, 20. ^ joj^n 15 : 1-12. 

341 



12 Tll-E YOUNG CONVERT. 

to death, and turns into the road to heaven.^ 
Sometimes, if he grows careless, his feet will 
slip out of the way; but the moment that he 
sees his danger he must call on God for help, 
and turn back into the way of life again. ^ Do 
you understand that ?^^ 

"Yes.^^ 

^^ Again. If you could have put new life 
into that dead soldier who was carried out of 
the ward a few hours ago, you could only tell 
that he was alive again, by his motions, 

'' First, his heart begins to beat ; then he 
begins to breathe ; his eyes slowly open ; pretty 
soon he moves his hands and his feet; then, in a 
little while, he speaks and walks. 

"So, you are by nature dead in sin? God 
puts new life by His Spirit into your dead 
heart.^ 

"Then you begin to see and hear,^ — imper- 
fectly at first, perhaps, but more and more dis- 
tinctly; then your tongue begins to speak for^ 

1 Jer. 50 : 3. Isa. 51 : 11. 2 Matt. 26 : 69-75. 

3 Eom. 5 : 12. * Eph. 2 : 1-6. 

5 Eph. 1 : 18. Matt. 13 : 15, 16. ^ 1 Pet. 2 : 9. 
342 



WHAT IT MEANS TO BECOME A CHRISTIAN. 13 

God, and your whole life moves towards Him, 
in the way of His commandments.^ Is tliat 
plain f^ 

^^ Yes : I understand it now/^ 

" Once more. You have broken God^s law, — 
stand before Him condemned, under sentence of 
death .^ Christ has suffered the penalty of that 
broken law, in the stead of every one wlio be- 
lieves on Him;^ and so, the moment that you are 
regenerated, or receive Him as your Saviour, 
you stand ^ justified^ or acquitted (or clear from 
the punishment of sin) in God^s sight, as if you 
never had sinned.^ 

^^ In that moment God ^ converts' you, or 
' turns^ you from sin to Himself, and gives you 
power, by His Spirit, to keep turning from sin 
to God ; and will give you that power, if you 
seek it ;^ and He requires you to use it every 
day, until the day of your death.^ 

1 Kom. 8 : 11, 14. Gal. 5 : 25. Jer. 7 : 23. Deut. 26 : 
17, 18. 2 j^oiji, 5 . 12. John 3 : 18. 

3 Isa. 53. 2 Cor. 5 : 19, 21. Eom. 5 : 6. 

^ Kom. 8 : 1. Kom. 3 : 24. Kom. 5 : 1, 8, 9. Col. 2 : 
13, 14. 5 Matt. 11 : 13. 

6 John 8: 31. 2 Tim. 3 : 14. Matt. 24: 13. Matt. 28: 20. 

343 



14 THE YOUNG CONVERT. 

" Then, as you turn from sin, God draws you 
to Himself (or * sanctifies' you), by His Spirit.^ 
The qualities in you which were evil before, He 
changes to good, and so takes away more and 
more the power of sin ; makes it easier for you 
to keep from doing wrong, and easier for you to 
do right ; makes you to grow more and more 
like God, and love Him better, until He takes 
you up to live with Himself forever.^ 

"And so God's plan is to educate the Chris- 
tian (as it were) for heaven while he is upon 
the earth ; to make him hate sin, and help him 
to fight against it, so that he will enjoy being 
where there is no more sin. 

" To make him love God more and more, so 
that he will enjoy being where He is. 

" To make him love holiness more and more, 
so that he will enjoy being ^vhere all are holy. 

" We must have our tastes and habits changed 
to what suits the society of heaven, and our de- 
sires begin to go out to it, while we are upon 
the earth, or it will be no heaven to us.^ Do 
you understand that?'' 

1 1 Cor. 6 : 11. 2 Pr^y. 4 : 18. ^ j^hn 3 : 5-7. 

344 



WHAT IT MEANS TO BECOME A CHRISTIAN. 15 



(( 



Yes, perfectly.'^ 

^^Again : sometimes the beginning of this new 
life is like the sun's crossing the meridian at 
noonday. You may not be able to tell just 
the moment it comes to it, although you may 
be watching ; but you can tell that it has crossed 
it, by the way that the shadows are cast. 

" In the morning, they fall towards the west ; 
in the afternoon, towards the east. If you 
should not awake until after mid-day, you could 
tell that it was afternoon, just by them. 

"Sometimes, on cloudy days like this, the 
shadows are very dim; but still they are there 
(you see), and you can see them distinctly, if 
you look closely enough. 

" Sometimes, when the sun shines brightly, 
you can see them very plainly. 

" Now, let us see which way the shadows of 
your heart fall, and try, by this, to find out 
whether you have crossed the dividing line be- 
tween death and life eternal. 

"Before, you loved sin. Do you love it 
nowf' 

"No: I hate it,'' he said, so quickly and 

345 



16 THE YOUNG CONVERT. 

earnestly that I could not doubt him. ^^ I wish 
I never could commit another sin again^ as 
long as I live.^^ 

'' Before^ you did not love God. You did 
not want to think about Him, or hear or read 
about Him. Sometimes you almost wished that 
there was no God, so that you could enjoy your- 
self in sin as much as you pleased, without 
being called up before Him to answ^er for it. 

" Perhaps you tried to believe that there was 
no God, or only used His holy name to swear 
by. Do you still feel so towards Him V^ 

'' No, indeed. I love Him. The only trouble 
is, I do not love Him enough.^^ 

'^ Before, you used to read your Bible some- 
times, when your parents told you to ; but you 
used to love best to read the stories in it. The 
words of Jesus seemed very dull to you. You 
would pass them by, or read them with your 
thoughts on something else. 

'^ Sometimes, when God^s Spirit troubled you 
with thoughts of your sins, and the judgment, 
you used to get your Bible, and read it as a 
kind of penance, w^ith a feeling as if the mere 

346 



WHAT IT MEANS TO BECOME A CHRISTIAN. 17 

reading of it would mark out some of your sins 
and make you better. Or, you would pick it 
up, sometimes, when you had nothing else to 
read. But you never read it because you really 
wanted to, or enjoyed reading it more than any 
other book. Is that true ?'' 

" I am afraid it is.^^ 

" Now, how does the Bible seem to you ?" 

'' I like to read it. I always feel better after 
I do. It scarcely seems like the same book. It 
seems as if there must have been a mist, or 
something, over my eyes when I read it before; 
the same words now seem to have a new mean- 
ing. I can understand it so much better.^^ 

^^Your dead eyes are beginning to see with 
the new life that God has put into your soul;^ 
and the Bible will seem plainer to you, and you 
will see into its meaning more clearly, the more 
and the longer you use them in reading it. 

'' Before, you would rather be with people who 
were not Christians. You used to choose for 
your companions those who cared as little for 



1 Eph. 1 : 18. 

30 347 



18 THE YOUNG CONVERT. 

God as you did. You felt more comfortable 
with them ; you liked their ways better. 

" If a Christian came among you when you 
were with them, you used to wish, in your 
heart, that he would go away. His presence 
was a sort of restraint to you ; it made you feel 
your own wickedness more, even though you 
might make sport of him after he had gone. 
You felt that there was something which sepa- 
rated you from him ; and you would gladly 
have taken whatever it w^as down, and brought 
him upon a level with yourself. And, besides, 
you were afraid that he would reprove you for 
your sins, or speak to you about your soul ; and 
you did not want to thinh about that yourself, if 
you could help it. Is that true f^ 
. " The most of it, I'm afraid.'^ 

" Now how is it ? Do you love best to be 
with those w^ho hate God f^ 

" No, indeed : I do not. When I go out among 
the boys, and hear them swear, and go on so, I 
come right back into the ward again. I can't 
bear to hear them. It never seemed half so 
wicked in them before. I wish they wouldn't 

348 



WHAT IT MEANS TO BECOME A CHRISTIAN. 19 



N 



do it. I wish they were all Christians. Some- 
times I feel as if I must talk to them about it ; 
but something holds me back.^^ 

'^Do you have the same feelings when you 
are among Christians^ now, that you used to 
havef^ 

" K'o, ma'am. I would rather be among them 
all the time, if I could. I remember how dry 
and stupid their talk used to seem to me ; but 
I like to listen to it, now. I wish I was more 
like them. 

^' I used to have to go to church and Sunday- 
school, when I was at home ; but Sunday was 
always such a dull day to me. I was glad when 
it was over ; but now I am glad when Sunday 
comes. I never feel better than I do in our 
prayer-meetings when they talk about these 
things. It seems more like home than any place 
else.'' 

" Before, when you saw any one coming to- 
wards you that you thought was going to talk 
to you about your soul, you felt like getting out 
of his way, if you could. You did not want to 
listen to him. Do you feel that way still?" 

349 



20 THE YOUNG CONVERT. 

" No, indeed : when any persons come into 
the ward that I think are true Christians, I feel 
my heart warm towards them. I want them to 
come and talk to me too; and I feel disap- 
pointed if they don't." 

^^ Before, you did not care any thing about 
Jesus (God in Christ), — scarcely ever thought 
about Him. How do you feel towards Him 
nowf' 

"It seems to me as if I had come nearer 
to Him, somehow^,'' he said, slowly, and as if 
he were trying to look into his heart and put 
what he found there into words. " I like to 
hear people talk about Him ; I never get tired 
listening to them. I love to read about Him ; 
and when I think how I used to treat 'Him, you 
don't know how sorry I feel. I wonder how I 
could be so ungrateful to Him, when He loved 
me so much. I think I can never act that way 
again. I feel as if my heart was going out to 
Him, somehow. Yes, I know I do love Him ; 
but, oh! not one-half as much as I know I 
ought to." 

" You did not feel that way three months ago ?" 

350 



WHAT IT MEAXS TO BECOME A CHRISTIAN. 21 

" No^ ma^am. I never felt just so in my life 
before/^ 

"Your old heart did not have any such feel- 
ings. What has caused such a change in it ?" 

" God must have done it. Nothing else 
could.^^ 

"jffoi^didHedoitf' 

" By giving me a new hearty I suppose.^^ 

He sat in deep thought for a little time ; and, 
as I watched his face, I could see the shadows 
gradually passing away, and th^ light of peace 
coming into it. 

"I do hope/^ he said, slowly, at last, — ^Ves, 
I think I may hope, — that I have been born 
again; that I belong to Jesus now.^^ (I had 
used that expression so often in my first talks 
with him.) 

^' I know J do want to be His, with all my 
heart.'' 

"If you think that it would be any help to 
you,'' I said, presently, "you might enter into 
a ' covenant' ^ or agreement with God now, and 
then renew your vow in public, v/hen you 

1 2 Chron. 24 : 31. 

30* 351 



22 THE YOUNG CONVERT. 

unite with some churchy if God should let you 
live to do so. 

^^ Write it down, if you choose, so that you 
can carry it with you, to look at every little 
while and see whether you have kept your part 
of the agreement. God ahvays keeps His pro- 
mises. You will find them in the Bible. 

^^You might write something like this," I 
said, giving him a '^ dedication card," on which 
were words like the following : — 

^^ ^ O Lord, I am not w^orthy to come to Thee ; 
but Thou hast invited me to do so, and this 
day" (the date) ^^ I do, with my whole heart, 
accept that invitation. I do, this day, with my 
whole heart, take Thee to be my God ; the Bible 
to be the rule of my life ; Thy Spirit to prepare 
me for heaven ; the Lord Jesus Christ to be my 
only Saviour; and I do, this day, mth my whole 
heart, give myself up to Him, altogether, soul 
and body, all that I have and am, both for this 
world and the next ; and I ask Thee, earnestly, 
to help me to keep this agreement faithfully, 
even to the end.' " 

We went over his part of the covenant, sen- 

352 



WHAT IT MEANS TO BECOME A CHRISTIAN. 23 

tence by sentence^ and talked over what each 
one involved as applied to his heart and life. 

'' Could you^ with your icliole hearty sign that, 
do you think?'' 

"Yes: I think I coukV 

"It is a very, very solemn thing to enter into 
such a covenant with God ; but, if you think 
you can do so sincerely, find some quiet place, 
if possible, where there is no one but God and 
your own soul ; and then, after an earnest prayer 
to God to help you, by His Holy Spirit, sign 
your consent to be the Lord's. Will you do 
this?" 

"Yes : God helping me, I will.'^ 

" If I can only hold out,'^ he said, after a 
few minutes' silence. " I have seen so many 
who started to be Christians and then turned 
back." 

" You did not need to take enough food, be- 
fore you left home, to last you for three years, 
did you ?" 

"Why, no." And he looked as if he thought 
the question a strange one. 

"'You did not even carry a loaf with you 

353 



24 THE YOUNG CONVERT. 

from home. Government promised to furnish 
you with food while you were in its service, 
and you trusted it without any fear. If you 
had doubted the promise, you would have dis- 
honoured the government. 

^' So, Christ has promised to furnish you with 
daily supplies of grace and strength sufficient 
for all your needs ; ^ and you must not only trust 
Him for to-day, but for to-morrow, and the next 
day, and every day of your life, even to the 
end. 

" But the ' Commissary' may be full of the 
best of food, yet, unless you ' draw' it and use 
it, it will not do you any good : will it?'' 

^^No." 

^^So, God's ' storehouse is always full of food 
for your soul; but He has not promised to give 
it to you unless you ask^ for it. ^Ask, and it 
shall be given you,' He says;^ and you need to 
drsiw fresh supplies from Him every day, or your 
soul will grow lean and faint. 

" I shall not see you again, brother, perhaps" 
(he was expecting to return to camp before my 

1 2 Cor. 12 : 9. ^ ^^ek. 36 : 37. ^ Matt. 7 ; 7. 

354 



WHAT IT MEANS TO BECOME A CHRISTIAN. 25 

next visit), " and I want to talk a little while 
about your future life in this world, if God 
should give you one. 

" If you are a Christian, if you belong to 
Christ, you must remember that you are not 
your own now ; you are ' bought with a price f ^ 
you are the Lord^s. 

"When you came into the army, you gave up 
your will to your country for three years. Your 
will says now, ^Go home a little while, and see 
the dear ones there.^ Your country says, ^Stay 
where you are,^ and you have to obey it 

" So, when you enlist under Jesus, you give 
up your will into His hands, — not for three 
years only, — for He will not accept volunteers 
for any term of service less than life. If you 
leave Him before the time is out, what are 
youf' 

"A deserter, I suppose,'^ he said, slowly, lift- 
ing his eyes to my face as he spoke. 

" Yes. That is a hard word ; but it is true. 
And the penalty of desertion is — what ?'' 

" Death.'^ 

1 1 Cor. 6 : 20. '■ " 

355 



26 THE YOUNG CONVERT. 

^^ Being shut out of heaven forever.^ 

^^ Religion is not something that you can pick 
up and carry until it becomes inconvenient to 
you, and then lay it down and go back and get 
it when you please. You need to carry it every 
moment of your life. You need to carry it into 
all your business transactions, into all your 
duties, into all your pleasures, into all your 
intercourse with those around you.^ It must 
be the controlling principle of your thoughts 
and words and looks and actions. God puts 
that living principle into your heart, and re- 
quires you to use it at all times and under all 
circumstances. His grace is sufficient to help 
you in every time of need; and He has promised 
to give it to you always, if you seek it from 
Him. 

"You have read Bunyan's ^Pilgrim's Pro- 
gress'?'' 

"Oh, yes." 

"You remember w4iat a time Christian had 
climbing the ' hill Difficulty' ? " 

"Yes; I do." 

1 Heb. 10 : 26-39. ^ i ^^ov, 10 : 31. 

356 



WHAT IT MEANS TO BECOME A CHRISTIAN. 27 

^^The ^lill Difficulty' is before you, on your 
road to the ^Celestial City/ brother. Every 
^pilgrim' has to climb it; and he can do so in 
the strength which God gives, only. 

^^You come to it when you have to battle 
with evil habits which you may have con- 
tracted, or evil propensities and passions which 
seem now to be dead, but are only suspended. 
For instance, do you ever get angry?'' 

"Yes, ma'am. I used to. I am naturally 
quick-tempered; and I used to say and do 
things when I Vv^as angry that I vras sorry for 
afterwards. But I haven't been angry for some 
time, now." 

"No: because, for one reason, perhaps, you 
haven't been tempted very much lately. You 
may think that you have got rid of your temper, 
because you do not feel it noAV, and so be taken 
by surprise and overcome, or be discouraged, 
because you were not on guard, watching for 
it. But you are only human yet, brother, and 
will be so as long as you stay in this world ; 
only, if you are a true Christian, you have (by 
the Holy Spirit) jput your human nature under 

357 



28 THE YOUNG CONVERT. 

the controlling grace of God ;^ and He has 
given you a new poiver to overcome what is evil 
in"^ it:^ and so, whenever you feel your temper, 
or any evil passion or desire, rising in your 
heart, you must send up a quick prayer to God 
for help to fight it down. Cry, ^Lord, help me!' 
wuth all your heart, and the help will come;^ 
and you will grow stronger after every such vic- 
tory, and your enemies will grow weaker, until 
at last the Captain of your salvation ^ wdll bring 
you off ^more than conqueror'^ over them all, 
in heaven. 

^^ You come to the hill ^ Difficulty' when the 
world comes into conflict with your religion, or 
when you have to give up some worldly Interest 
or pleasure which you feel that you cannot ob- 
tain or keep with God's blessing. Do not turn 
to the right or left from the strait and nar- 
row path ^ God has marked out for you to walk 

1 Eom. 12 : 1. Eom. 6 : 6-23. 

2 Ezek. 11 : 19, 20. Eom. 8:9. ^ Psalm 145 : 18, 19. 
* Heb. 2 : 10. ^ Eom. 8 : 37. ^ Matt. 7 : 14. 

■^ God does not give us any new faculties in conversion : 
He only gives us a neiv 'power to control and guide those 
that He has already given us. 
358 



WHAT IT MEANS TO BECOME A CHRISTIAN. 29 

in^ for the sake of any earthly good. Heaven 
is worth more than they all. Do not let any 
thing come between you and it. The only road 
to the ' Celestial City/ in such a case, lies right 
over the top of the ^hill.^ God will help you to 
climb it. 

'' When you go out among your companions, 
and they see that you are changed, some of 
them may try to turn you back to your old self 
again ; but keep your eye fixed on the ' shining 
light^ at the end of the way, and go straight for- 
ward in God's strength. They will respect you 
the more in their hearts if you do, and God will 
strengthen you. 

"You must not think that because you do 
not belong to a church, your sin will not be so 
great if you break God's laws, or that He will 
excuse sin in you under any circumstances. 
His laws are just as binding on you at one time 
or in one place as in another. 

" You must not think that you will wait until 
you unite with some church before you begin to 
serve God with your whole heart. You can do 
a great deal of work for Him among your com- 

31 359 



30 THE YOUNG CONVERT. 

imnions. You Avill find plenty of opportunities, 
if you watch and seek and pray for them. You 
must begin to speak for Christ at oncc^ too ; no 
matter how hard it may be for you to do so at 
first. ^ The green cross^ (says some one) ^ is 
very heavy; but it grows lighter the longer you 
carry it.^ 

^^ You will often be thrown among those who 
do not love God, — perhaps despise His word. 
You may think^ ^It is no use to speak to them 
about their wrong-doing, or show that I disap- 
prove of it. It will do no good; they will only 
laugh at me^ or perhaps get angry;' but the true 
reason would be^ you have not courage to ac- 
knowledge yourself to be one of God's children ; 
and so, by your silence, you encourage their sin, 
and virtually deny Christ; and He has said,^ 
' Whosoever shall deny me before men, him Avill 
I also deny before my Father v/hich is in 
heaven.' 

^^ You may think, when you are with such, 

^ I cannot kneel down and pray before them. 

They wnll make sport of me. I will wait until 

1 Matt. 10 : 33. 2 Tim. 2 : 12. Luke 12 : 9. 
360 



WHAT IT MEANS TO BECOM]^ A CHRISTIAN. 31 

they are asleep, or will pray after I lie down. 
I can talk to God just as well that way. He 
looks at the heart.^ And so He does ; but the 
truth would be, }'ou were ashamed of Jesas; and 
He has said' that whosoever is ashamed of 
Him before men, of them He will be ashamed 
before his Father, and before His angels. 

" That would be trying to go around the foot 
of the ^ hill Difficulty,^ thinking that you could 
come out into the '^king^s highway^ all right 
on the other side ; and you never can do that. 

'^ If you are one of Christ's soldiers, you are 
only a ' new recruit' in the Lord's army yet, and 
cannot expect to endure long marches and hard- 
ships like a veteran; but you must exercise the 
strength He gives you. Every evil overcome 
makes sin weaker and grace stronger. 

" You have all your battles to fight yet,^ and 
you need to ^ put on the whole armour of God, 
that ye may be able to stand against the wiles 
of the devil/ " I said, turning to Eph. 6th chap- 
ter, and reading from the eleventh verse. And 
then we talked a little while about the different 

1 Mark 8 : 38. Luke 9 : 26. ^1 Tim. 6 : 12. 

361 



32 THE YOUNG CONVERT. 

parts (or ^^pieces'^) of that armour, and how to 
use them. 

^' If you are a Christian, you are only a babe 
in Christ^ yet, and must creep before you can 
walk ; but you must not be contented with creep- 
ing. You must not think that if you have 
^got religion/ as some call it, that is enough. 
You must heep it, and use it, and seek for raore 
all the time. The command is to 'grow in 
grace/ and in the knowledge of our Lord and 
Saviour Jesus Christ,' until you arrive at the 
stature of a perfect man in Him ;^ and to do 
this, you must study your Bible, attend meet- 
ings for worship whenever you possibly can, 
and watch and pray. 

" Prayer is simply talking to God, — going to 
Him with the simple faith of a little child, as 
he tells his father all his wants and troubles, 
feeling sure that that kind father will listen 
and will help him. 

" ' Prayer' (says some one) ^ is the telegraph- 
wire between God and our souls; and Jesus 

1 Matt. 18 : 3. 1 Pet. 2:2. 2 2 Pet. 3 : 18. 

3 Eph. 4 : 13-16. 

362 



WHAT IT MEANS TO BECOME A CHRISTIAN. 33 

sits at the other end of the wire, waiting to 
receive our "despatches'^ and send answers back 
to us/ 

"We can find no place on earth from which 
a message cannot reach Him. No matter where 
we may be^ or in what we may be employed, we 
can talk to God, and His ear is ever waiting to 
hear our faintest whisper, and His hand always 
ready to help us. 

"You need to talk to God in prayer every 
day, — many times a day, perhaps;^ you need to 
go to Him for the pardon of every sin.^ You 
have a great deal to thank Him for, and a great 
deal to ask of Him.^ He cares for your body as 
well as for your sguL^ Whenever you are in 
trouble about your temporal welfare, tell Him 
all about it. He pities you as a father pities 
his children,^ and will help you.^ 

" If you are tempted, remember that Christ 
was tempted too, more than you can be.^ He 
knows what it is, and is able to help you.^ 

1 Psalm 55 : 17. Dan. 6 : 10. 

2 Eph. 5 : 20. 1 John 2 : 1. ^ p^n, 4 . q^ 

* Matt. 10 : 29-32. ^ pgalm 103 : 13. « pgalm 50 : 15. 
7 Heb. 4 : 15, 16. ^ jjeb. 2 : 18. 

31- ^ 363 



34 THE YOUNG CONVERT. 

^^ If you are sick^ remember that Jesus suf- 
fered pain/ He knows how that feels, too. 
Ask Him to take it from you/ if He sees best, 
or bless it to you.^ 

'' Every thing that concerns you interests 
Him. There is nothing too small for His 
notice.^ 

'^ Wherever you go, ask Him to go with you. 
You do not knov/ what danger you are going 
into; you need His protection. You do not 
know what temptation you are going into ; you 
need His help. 

^^That is a very good w^ay to find out whether 
we are going to the righi place. We could not 
ask Him to go with us to the dance, to the card- 
table, to the theatre, to the saloon, or to any 
place of sinful amusement. 

^^That is a good way to find out whether we 
are going to do the right tiling. Whatever we 
cannot ask God to bless us in doing, must be 



wrong. 



1 John 19 : 1-31. 

2 James 5 : 13. Jer. 17 : 14. Psalm 103 : 3. 
8 Heb. 12 : 5-14. t Luke 12 : 7. 
361 



WHAT IT MEANS TO BECOME A CHRISTIAN. 35 

^^ Watch} The true soldier of the cross 
remembers that enemies within and all around 
him are watching for his soul^ and so he must 
always stand on guard. He remembers that 
all the time, and everywhere, God sees him; 
and he loves God, and fears to offend Him, and 
so he tries to live as in His sight. 

"You need to watch your heart. You know 
how apt evil thoughts are to creep into it; and 
a sinful thought or desire, if kept in the heart 
and cherished there, is as much a sin in God's 
sight as a sinful act;^ and, if you let it stay 
there, it will send out sinful words and actions 
too.^ Try to keep your heart dean in God's 
sight,^ He is looking into it every moment. 
Do not let any thing stay in it that you would 
not be willing to have Him see. 

" Watch your words and actions, not only for 
your own sake, but for the sake of those around 
you.^ Your companions will watch you closely, 
although you may not know it, and judge of 

1 Matt. 26 : 41. Mark 13 : 37. 

2 Matt. 5 : 28. 1 John 3 : 15. 

3 Matt. 25 : 19. Mark 7 : 21-24. 

* Matt. 6:8. ^ Col. 4 : 5. 

365 



36 THE YOUNG CONVERT. 

religion by what they see in you. Take care, 
then, that you do not bring a reproach upon the 
name of Jesus. You must try to be a ^recruit- 
ing officer' for Him, rather; try to get your com- 
panions to enlist under Him and love Him 
too.^ 

'^ Study God's word prayerfully.^ If possible, 
do not let a day pass without reading it.^ It is 
the ^rule' given you to measure your life by. 
It is a copy of the ^constitution and laws' of 
God's government. It is the ' book of Regu- 
lations and Tactics' for His soldiers ; it is the 
^guide-book' to heaven.^ Whenever you are in 
doubt as to what is right or wrong, go to it for 
direction. It, read in the light of the Spirit, is 
the only sure guide.^ 

^^You know that when you are marching 
there are three ways of ^keeping step.' One is, 
by keeping step with the man before you ; but, 
then, he may be ^out of time.' Another is, by 
watching the shoulders of those in advance of 
you; but these may all have the wrong step. 

1 Kev. 22 : 17. Ezek. 3 : 17-22. 2 john 5 : 39. 

s Acts 17 : 11. 4 Psalm 119 : 105. ^ Psalm 119. 

366 



THE YOUXG CONVERT. 37 

The best and safest way is to listen for yourself, 
and keep time with the music, 

^'So; whenever you are in doubt as to whether 
any thing is right^ do not watch your neighbour 
and follow him : lie may be wrong. Do not pin 
Nyour faith to any ' doctrines or commandments 
of men -J they may all be wrong. ^ The only safe 
plan is to study God^s orders^ prayerfully, and 
keep step by His word.^ 

'^ You need to ^examine' yourself whether ye 
be in the faith ^ or not, very often. Perhaps 
you cannot tell by your feelings in any one 
day or moment whether you are 7^eaUy in the 
faith or not, because your feelings may be acted 
upon by some other influences; although you 
may scarcely suspect it at the time. The safest 
plan is to judge by the general tenor of your 
life;"^ to examine your heart and life by the 
light of God^s Word and Spirit, and see which 
way the ^ shadows' fall, — whether towards God, 
or towards the world. 

^^ Whenever you feel your love for God grow- 

1 Matt. 15 : 9. 2 p^ov. 3 : 5, 6. 

3 2 Cor. 13 : 5. Gal. 6 : 3, 4. * Psalm 139 : 23, 24. 

367 



38 THE YOUNG CONVERT. 

ing weaker, or sin seems less hateful to you, 
take care! your soul is in danger;^ — you are 
falling asleep on guard, and the penalty of doing 
that is— what?'' 

^^Death.'^ 

" You are neglecting some duty, and, while 
you were not watching, an enemy has crept into 
the camp of your heart. You must find out 
what it is, at once, and cry to God for help, and 
never rest until it is driven out, or killed. 

"When you go home, if God spares you until 
then, it will be your duty and privilege, as soon 
as possible, to unite with some church, because 
the church is an institution of God's own ap- 
pointment on earth ; ^ and the best plan will be 
for you to study the doctrines and rules of the 
diflFerent orthodox churches, and, asking God's 
Spirit to help you, compare them with the 
Bible, and whichever one you think ^ keeps 
step' best by it — whichever you feel the most 
at home in — is the one for you to join. 

1 John 15 : 6. 

2 Matt. 28 : 19. Eph. 4 : 11, 12. Heb. 10 : 25. Acts 

2:42. 

368 



THE YOUNG CONVERT. 39 

" But joining a church is only putting on the 
uniform after you enlist. Did putting that on 
make you a soldier f^ 

^^ What did ?^^ 

'^ Putting down my name and taking the 
oath.^' 

'' You ' put down your name' and ^ take the 
oath' as a soldier of Jesus^ when you receive 
Him as your only Saviour, and give yourself 
to Him. If you had deserted after you enlisted, 
and before you got your uniform, could they 
have punished you ?'' 

'' Yes : just the same/' 

" If you had put on a uniform without en- 
listing, what would you have been ?" 

^' Only a citizen in soldier's clothes." 

" And you would have had no right to wear 
them. You would be appearing under false 
colours — professing to be what you were not; 
and that is sin. 

^^ So, putting on the uniform of a church will 
not make any one a Christian; neither is it 
always a sure sign of one. Many a one wears 

369 



40 THE YOUNG CONVERT. 

that who has no right to be numbered among 
God's children; but that does not make it any 
the less your duty and mine, brother, not only 
to enlist, but to put on the uniform, and join 
some church-regiment in God's army on earth. 

^^ You might think that you could enlist and 
then go off by yourself and fight just as well as 
if you were in a regiment ; and so perhaps you 
might; but that is not the way that government 
has ordered it ; neither is it the plan of God's 
government on earth. 

^^This world is the enemy's country, and 
God has appointed that the soldiers of the 
cross should be banded together in a church, so 
that they can do battle with the enemy of souls 
better, and help and defend and comfort each 
other. 

^^ Then, by putting on the uniform, you profess, 
to all w^ho see you, that you are a soldier. 

^^So, by uniting with the church, you con- 
fess^ Christ before men, as He has commanded 
you to do, and profess to be His disciple, and 
are admitted to the church-privileges of God's 

1 Matt. 10 : 32. Acts 8 : 37. Kom. 10 : 9, 10. 
370 



THE YOUXG CONVERT. 41 

children. But only by really belonging to 
Jesus^ and being true and faithful to Him to 
the end of your life on earth, can }' ou have a 
right to the privileges of a Christian, and a title, 
through Christ, to the inheritance that He has 
purchased for you in heaven.^ 

"^He that shall endure to the end,^ Jesus 
told us, while He lived on earth,^ Hhe same 
shall be saved. ^ 

"He sent this message to us after He went 
back to heaven : — 

" ' Be thou faithful unto death, and I will 
give thee a crown of life.^ 

" ' Hold fast that which thou hast, that no 
man take thy crown.^ 

" ' To him that overcometh will I grant to 
sit with me in my throne, even as I also over- 
came, and am s^t down with my Father in His 
throne.^ ^^^ 

I have never seen my little sergeant since; 
but my young friend saw him frequently for 
some time afterwards in camp, and brought me 

1 2 Tim. 4 : 7, 8. 2 Matt. 24 : 13. ^ p^ev. 2 : 10. 
* Kev. 3 : 11, 21. 

32 371 



42 THE YOUNG CONVERT. 

back the good news that he was still " holding 
out'^ (as he expressed it), " and felt more and 
more like doing so, every day.'^ 

I had lost all trace of him for some months, 
when, one day, as I was talking to one of the 
new nurses in a ward in another hospital (a 
Christian, he told me), he asked me if I remem- 
bered Sergeant L. "He was sick for some 
time in the B Hospital, perhaps you re- 
member/^ 

" Oh, yes : I remember him distinctly. Where 
is he now ? Do you know him V' 

" Yes : I know him very well. He belongs to 
my company in the regiment. It is quar- 
tered in the L Barracks now, and I go down 

and see the boys, sometimes, when I have time. 

"I saw Sergeant L the other night, and 

we had a long talk together. I told him that 
you visited this hospital too; and he told me to 
tell you that ^ he was holding out yet, and he 
hoped that God would help him to do so, as 
long as he lived.^ ^' 

" Oh, I am so glad ! — so glad V^ 

" I never saw such a change in a boy in my 

372 



THE YOUXG CONVERT. 43 

life as there is in him since he was sick 
that time. He used to be pretty wild^ and 
never cared to hear about any thing good ; but 
now he is so steady, and reads his Bible, and 
goes to church, always, when he can, and never 
joins the boys in any wickedness; and yet he is 
always so cheerful and kind that they can't help 
liking him. 

" He told me about the change that had come 
to him ; and now we have a little talk about 
these things almost every time that I see him.'' 

I gave the nurse some little books and mes- 
sages to carry to him. His regiment was sent 
to the field shortly afterwards, and my little 
sergeant passed away from my sight, most pro- 
bably until I meet him (as I hope) '' up yonder." 

373 



THE 



NEGLECTED OPPORTUNITY. 



[9^? 



THE NEGLECTED OPPORTUNITY. 



"Why! who is this? How did you get here, 
little brother?'' 

I had slipped into Ward Two, after the lamps 
were lighted, to see some of the new patients 
who had reached us from the South that day, 
and just as 1 opened the door my eyes fell on 
the strangest sight. The bed nearest me had 
been nevv^ly filled with straw, and upon the top 
of it, his little limbs scarcely reaching more 
than half its length, lay the oddest, oldest-look- 
ing boy, with a pair of bright black eyes look- 
ing at me out of a little, thin, withered face. 

"I came up on the boat. I belong to the 

regiment.'' (I have forgotten it. I wish 

I could forget the face as well.) "A drummer- 
boy ?" " No : a soldier." And what pride there 
was in that shrill, childish voice as he told me 

3 377 



4 THE NEGLECTED OPPORTUNITY. 

the battles he had been in ! He ! That child ! 
Afterwards I learned his story. 

He was a stray waif from one of our great 
cities, — such a one as can only be found there; 
had never known either parents or home, but 
"just growed/' and struggled to get a living 
out of the w^orld the best way he could, until a 
recruiting-oflficer came along, w^ho wanted very 
much one more name to complete his number, 
and added his. 

"Have you seen ^Our baby' yet?'' asked a 
nurse, as I came out of the ward that night. 
He was christened " Our baby" by all in his 
Avard. I never knew another name for him. 
They moved him to a cot near the stove, and 
nurses and convalescents petted and nursed 
him, and for a time he grew better under their 
care. 

Our hospitals were very full then, and death 
was busy in every ward : so I spent my strength 
with those I knew must soon die, and gave 
" Our baby" only a few passing words, waiting 
until I could have more time to spend with him. 
He was getting so much better, I thought, and he 

378 



THE NEGLECTED OPPOETUNITY. 5 

needed so much instruction. He could neither 
read nor write ; knew little more of God than a 
heathen child ; had scarcely heard the name of 
Christ; save when linked with an oath. I should 
have to begin with the very rudiments of saving 
truth. And so I waited for a more convenient 
season, giving him my brightest-covered little 
tracts (he liked those best), for his comrades to 
read to him, and resting myself when I came 
home at night by putting together all the old 
engravings I could find into picture-books for 
his amusement. At last a day came when I 
thought I could give him an hour; but when I 
stood beside his cot he had gone beyond my 
reach ! I thought at first he was asleep ; but 
no : he was dying ! I bent close to his ear and 
tried to make him hear me; but not a muscle of 
that still face moved. Sight or sound of earth 
could never reach him more. 

Dear reader, pray that you may never knoio 
how I felt as I held that little, cold hand in 
mine. God had sent this untaught wanderer 
to me that I might teach him the way of life, 
and, instead of doing that, I had amused him, 

379 



6 THE NEGLECTED OPPORTUNITY. 

and petted him, and let the precious hours pass 
by, and now he had gone from me until I should 
meet him in the judgment ! 

They gave him a soldier's burial; every com- 
rade who was able to walk followed him to the 
grave, and they laid " Our baby^' in it with all 
the ^^ honours of war/' In that quiet graveyard, 
on the hill, there is one mound, shorter than its 
kindred hundreds, on which I do not care to 
look; because I know that when it opens on 
that last day a little accusing face will rise to 
meet me with its story, in the presence of my 
Judge. 

That is the only face lying there, I trust, that 
I need dread to see. Whenever I have been 
tempted to postpone a duty, or help one of my 
men " to pass the time'' before he had " re- 
deemed it," ^ '^ Our baby's" face would come be- 
fore me, and prevent it. 

Parent, Sabbath-school teacher. Christian 
worker, are you letting any such ^^ accusing 
faces" go from your side to meet you in the 
judgment? 

1 Eph. 5 : 16. 

380 



THE NEGLECTED OPPORTUNITY. 7 

Dear reader^ in whatever position God has 
placed you, what witness will those who meet 
your eye each day bear at that judgment-seat for 
you ? If you have no '^ accusing face'^ awaiting 
you now, do not send one there ! 

Not only to the prophet, but to all to whom 
He has given opportunity and influence, God 
speaks : — 

" When I say unto the wicked, Thou shalt 
surely die, and thou givest him not warning, 
nor speakest to warn the wicked from his 
wicked way, to save his life ; the same wicked 
man shall die in his iniquity; but his blood 
will I require at thine hand. 

" ^ Yet if thou warn the wicked, and he turn 
not from his wickedness, nor from his wicked 
way, he shall die in his iniquity ; but thou hast 
delivered thy soul.^ ^^ ^ 

Not only to the minister, but to all upon 
whose ear the gospel-message falls, the Saviour 
says, " Let him that heareth say, Come.^^ ^ 

^^To him that knoweth to do good, and doeth 
it not, to him it is sin.^^^ 

1 Ezek. 3 : 17-22. 2 ^ev. 22 : 17. ^ j^mes 4 : 17. 

381 



HEAVEN 



33 



HEAVEK 



" Do you know that I scarcely ever think of 
heaven f 

'' I hope that I am a Christian. I know that 
I love God ; but I keep thinking more about 
what I can do for Him here, than about going 
to heaven when I die/^ 

I was sitting beside a sick soldier, that day^ 
talking about heaven, and Him who lives there; 
and one after another of the convalescents, 
walking around through the ward, had stopped 
to listen and to join in the conversation, as 
usual, and had seated themselves on the empty 
cots near us, until there were no more vacant 
places; while the youngest of them all, a little 
drummer-boy, was sitting on the floor at my 
feet, leaning against one of the men, and listen- 

3 385 



4 HEAVEN. 

ing with such a contented look on his pale, thin 
face. 

What delightful little '' Bethels" we used to 
have in the wards, so often ! I love to think of 
them yet; and I think that the memory of 
them lingers in more than one heart above 
ground to-day, while many who helped to make 
them have passed to the '' House of God'^ above. 

At such times Christians and those who were 
not would talk together, in low tones, about 
Jesus, and about their own souls, speaking so 
freely of their own thoughts and feelings. 

I used to wonder at their doing so, sometimes; 
but I knew that it was caused by the presence 
of Him who has promised that "where two or 
three are gathered together in my name, there am 
I ; " ^ and His Spirit had opened their hearts. 

The last speaker was a middle-aged man, 
who I had every reason to think was a Chris- 
tian. He had been in the hospital for months, 
working quietly and earnestly for Christ among 
his comrades in the wards, when he was able; 
was then the leader in the soldiers^ nightly 

1 Matt. 18 : 20. 
386 



HEAVEN. 5 

prayer-meeting, and foremost among them all 
in every good word and work. 

I think I have never met more devoted, ear- 
nest, working Christians than among the sol- 
diers in the hospitals. Nothing but the "love 
of God shed abroad in the heart by the Holy 
Spirit,^' ^ was strong enough to keep a man faith- 
ful to his God through the temptations of the 
army ; and those who possessed that, had a heart 
to work for Him, too. 

How much work has been done for the Mas- 
ter by Christian soldiers among their comrades 
will only be known when the "books are 
opened,^^ ^ as they stand among those w^ho are 
"disciples indeed.^^^ 

" Yes : it is pleasant to work for God, bro- 
ther,^^ I said to this one. " There is nothing 
pleasanter in the world, outside of the love of 
Christ in the heart; but the ^rest^^ that ^re- 
maineth^ to those who love and work for God, 
is ^far better.^ ^ 

" Don^t you remember, after a hard day^s 

1 Eom. 5:5. 2 ;^ev. 20 : 12. ^ Jq}^^ g : 31. . 

* Heb. 4:9. & Phil. 1 : 23. 

33* 387 



6 HEAVEN. 

work, when you were at home, how you used to 
enjoy resting yourself when it was ended? Or, 
after a hard day^s march throup:h the heat and 
dust, how happy you used to feel when you 
stopped for the night, and you threw down 
your blanket on the cool grass, and stretched 
your weary limbs upon it, and lay and looked 
up at the stars? 

"Why, it used to rest you, sometimes, as 
you marched, even to think about doing so; 
and sometimes, when you were almost ready to 
faint by the way, the thought of it would give 
you new strength. You would think, ^It is 
only a little way now, and then I can take my 
rest.^^^ 

" Yes, indeed : I do remember it well." 

"When we are tired^ heaven seems like a 
place to rest in; when we are in trouble, it 
seems like a place where there is no more sor- 
row ; when we are sick, it is a place where there 
is no more pain. There are no hospitals there. 
The inhabitants never say, ^ I am sick.^ ^ . 

"No more wounded men in that countrv, 

'^ 1 Isa. 33 : 24. 

388 



HEAVEN. 7 

brother/^ I said, as one of the men came up, 
and stood leaning upon his crutches for a mo- 
ment, and then one, who was sitting on a cot, 
gave him his place, and stood leaning against 
the iron loop at the foot of the bed. "Won^t 
that be pleasant f^ 

^^Yes, indeed it will;^^ and his eyes grew 
brighter at the thought. 

" When we look around such a place as this, 
heaven seems like a country where there is no 
more war.^ When our friends die, it is a 
place where there is ' no more death. ^ No more 
heart-aches there, as we say the last good-by to 
those we love. ' Good-by^ is never heard in all 
that happy land. Those we love will live with 
us forever .^^ 

^^ Heaven always seemed more real to me after 
mother died,^^ said the pale-faced boy on the 
floor. ^^It was that which first set me to 
thinking.^^ 

" I have two little children there, I hope,^^ 
said another soldier; ^^and yet, when I think 
about heaven, it seems like when you dream of 

1 Isa. 2 : 4. 

389 



8 HEAVEN. 

a place. I know that it is there; and yet it 
don^t seem a real place to me, — not as this world 
does.^' 

^' One reason of that is because we don't thinh 
of it enough. Do you know any thing about 
the island of Sardinia?" 
'' Not very much." 

" You believe that there is such a place ?" 
^' Oh, yes : I have seen it on the map." 
" Do you know any thing about California ?" 
^^Oh, yes: I had strong thoughts of going 
there, once." 

^^What did you do when you thought of 
going there ? I mean, what did you try to find 
out first?" 

'' Well, I tried to find out what the prospects 
would be, if I should go ; and I used to read 
descriptions of the country, and how the people 
lived, and all about it; and if I saw any thing 
about it in the newspapers, I used to be more 
interested in that than any thing else. Why, 
I was so much in the notion, for a while, that I 
could scarcely think about any thing else." 
^^What is the difference now, when you 

390 



HEAVEN. 9 

think of California, and when you think about 
Sardinia f^ 

"Well, California seems a great deal more 
real to me, because I know more about it. And, 
then, I have friends living there, that I get 
letters from. One of them came home on a 
visit, and I used to hear him talk about it a 
great deal: it was that which first put me in 
the notion of going there.^^ 

" Now, the more we read and think about 
heaven, the more real it seems to us. 

The more we talk and study about it, and 
the more we think about those who live there, 
and think about our going there some day, the 
more ' home-like^ it w^ill seem to us.^^ 

" But, then, we can^t know about heaven as 
we could about any place in this world, because 
no one ever came back from it to tell us 
about it.^^ 

" One, who lived in heaven from all eternity, 
came down, and spent thirty-three years in this 
world once. 

" He told us a little about it, when He lived 
here; and then, when He went back. He sent 

391 



10 HEAVEN. 

US letters (in the Bible), telling us more about 
it, — all that He thought best for us to know. 

"We can know a great deal better about 
heaven than we can about any place in this 
world that we have not seen ; because our friends 
or travellers might deceive us, but for this we 
have the word of One who cannot lie/^ ^ 

"You know," said another, "that some say 
that heaven is all around us ; that there is no 
such world. I mean, a real world like this. Do 
you think there is?" 

" Yes ; I do. Where that ^ centre and metro- 
polis of the universe' — as some one calls it — is, 
God has not seen fit to tell us ; and it is only a 
vain curiosity that seeks to be wise ^ above what 
is written.'^ 

"One writer (Dick) supposes it to be the 
central sun around which all other worlds re- 
volve ; and he reasons that it must be at least 
five hundred times (I think) larger than all the 
rest of the universe put together. 

" It is grand to ^ry to take in such a thought, 

— God, ^ Ou7^ Father in heaven/ seated upon His 

~ 1 Heb. 6 : 18. n^C^^T^Ve. 

392 



HEAVEN. 11 

throne^ in the centre of all His works, over- 
looking and guiding and ruling all the universe 
of His creation. But we know He does rule it ; 
and that is enough for us to know.^ No one 
can tell any thing more about where heaven is, 
or what it is like, than what God has chosen to 
tell us in the Bible. 

" But we know that it must be a plaee^ because 
the Bible says so.^ And, besides, there are three 
bodies in it now. 

" Christ took His human body back to heaven 
with Him, you know f and wherever Jesus is, 
is heaven. God took Enoch's ^ body and Elijah's ^ 
body into heaven, too, you remember. Christ 
promised, when He lived upon the earth, to 
come for us, and take us to Himself, that where 
He is there we might be also ; ^ and He has pro- 
mised to raise our bodies^ and take those who 
love Him into heaven.^ 

1 Deut. 29 : 29. 

2 John 14 : 2. 2 Cor. 5 : 1. Heb. 11 : 10. 

3 Luke 24 : 50, 51. 1 Pet. 3 ; 22. 

4 Gen. 5 : 24. Heb. 11 : 5. ^2 Kings 2 : 11. 
« John 14 : 3. Luke 23 : 43. ^ John 5 : 28, 29. 
8 Matt. 25 : 34. 1 John 3 : 2. 

393 



12 HEAVEN. 

" God has told us more about what hind of a 
place it is ; given us stray glimpses of it, scat- 
tered here and there through the Bible. Let 
us try to put some of those glimpses together, 
now, and see what we can learn about it," I 
said, taking a large Bible from the stand near 
me. 

" You must help me to think what we shall 
find when we go there. 

" ^ And I saw a new heaven and a new earth ; 
for the first heaven and the first earth were 
passed away; and there was no more sea.^^ 
That is one reason why I want to see the ocean 
while I am in this world. There is no sea in 
heaven. 

" Lef us put together what is not in that world, 
first. 

'' There will be no churches in it ; ^ for the 
Lord God Almighty and the Lamb are the 
temple of it.'^ 

" We shall have no prayer-meetings there. 

We will have no need to pray any more; for we 

shall have all that we desire, and will only have 

' 1 Eev. 21 : 1. 2 j^^v. 21 : 22. 

394 



HEAVEN. 13 

to praise God for having given us Jesus, and, 
through Him, having given us all things.^ 

^^^ There shall be no more death, neither sor- 
row, nor crying, neither shall there be any more 
pain/ ^ 

^^^And the city had no need of the sun, 
neither of the moon to shine in it/^ We must 
say good-by to sun and moon and stars, here; 
Ave will never see them in heaven, ^for there 
shall be no night there ;^ and they need no 
candle, neither light of the sun ; ^ for the glory 
of God did lighten it, and the Lamb is the 
light thereof/^ 

" ^ And there shall be no more curse.' ^ ^And 
there shall in no wise enter into it any thing 
that defileth, neither whatsoever worketh abo- 
mination, or maketh a lie;^ but they which are 
written in the Lamb's book of life.' 

" ^ They shall hunger no more, neither thirst 
any more ; neither shall the sun light on them, 
nor any heat.'^ And God shall wipe away all 

1 1 Pet. 1 : 3, 4. Kev. 7 : 9, 10. 2 Rev. 21 : 4. 

3 Kev. 21 : 23. * Kev. 22 : 5. ^ Rev. 21 : 23. 

6 Kev. 21 ; 3. ^ Kev. 21 : 27. « Kev. 7 : 16. 

34 395 



14 HEAVEN. 

tears from their eyes;^^ ^and sorrow and sigh- 
ing shall flee away/^ 

" Now, let us see what kind of a place even 
this world would be, if all that was taken out of 
it; or, we will take part of this world only. 
Suppose that it was the next State. 

'' Suppose that the moment after you crossed 
the line into the next State, you were forever 
free from the fear of death. If you were only 
on the other side of the line, you would never 
die. I think that some of these friends would 
feel like starting for that country to-night/' 

'' Yes, indeed,^^ said more than one voice. 

" Suppose that, as soon as you crossed the 

line, sickness and pain would leave you in a 

moment, and you would never feel them again. 

I think that some here who have a little strength 

would try to use it to reach that happy land ; 

and those who are too weak would plead with 

the others to try to take them ; and even this 

friend with the crutches would use them in 

trying to walk there, if there was no other way 

for him to reach it.^^ 

1 Eev. 7 : 18, 19. ^^saTssTlO 

396 



HEAVEN. i5 

" I would make a very strong effort, at least." 

" Suppose that, as soon as we crossed the line, 
we not only should never die, or ever feel pain, 
or sickness, or hunger , or thirsty or cold, or heaty 
but we should be forever free from fear and 
care and trouble of every kind. I think we 
should not feel like turning back, even if we 
were weary and the road was rough. We 
should think no pain or trouble on the way 
too great, if we could only reach it. 

^^If you had every thing that your heart 
could wish for in this world, would you be 
happy, friend ?" 

" I should think I ought to be." 

" Now, suppose that, as soon as we crossed the 
line, we should not only have every thing that we 
did not want taken from us, but we would have 
every thing that we did want given to us, — every 
desire of our hearts gratified, so that there would 
not be the very least thing left for us to wish for, 
even, and we should live forever with One whom 
we loved better than all the world beside. 

^^As soon as we crossed the line, we should 
not only have every care and trouble taken away 

397 



16 HEAVEN. 

from us, but we should have our hearts filled 
full, to overflowing, with the purest, sweetest, 
richest pleasure. The happiest moment of our 
lives here could scarcely give us the least idea 
of it. And that happiness, instead of growing 
any less, should grow stronger and brighter 
through a long eternity.^ Wouldn't that be a 
place worth struggling to reach, through all 
kinds of difficulties, for a lifetime f^ 

" Yes, indeed : it would more than repay us 
for them all, after we got there.^^ 

" How little we would think of the darkness 
and the pain and the weariness we should find 
on the road ! 

"We should keep thinking, ^It won't last 
long : only a little distance further, and I shall 
be forever free from them all.' " 

"Only a little while!" murmured the sick 
boy on the cot; and I knew of what he was 
thinking, as he closed his eyes. 

" What pains we should take to be sure that 

we were on the right road! How much we 

should be afraid of missing the way! How 

1 1 Pet. 1 : 18. Prov. 4 : 18. 
398 



HEAVEN. 17 

closely we would study the ' Guide-book' ! And 
if one who had opened up the road and tra- 
velled over it before us had promised to guide 
us and help us/ how near we should try to 
keep to him, for fear that we should lose our 
way, after all ! 

" Now J there is just such a world as that waiting 
for those who love Jesus; only we cannot even 
imagine how infinitely better it is than any thing 
we can think of or describe; for ^eye hath not 
seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into 
the heart of man, the things which God hath 
prepared for those that loye Him.'^ 

^^And that place is large enough to hold the 
whole world; and the gates of it are always 
open,^ so that any one who comes to them can 
enter in. And the King says to us,^ ^The Spirit 
and the Bride say. Come ; and whosoever will, 
let him' come; and ^him that cometh' ^I will 
in no wise cast out.'^ And He says, too, ^Let 
him that heareth say, Come.^ 

1 Psalm 16 : 11. Psalm 32 : 8. Matt. 28 : 20. 

2 1 Cor. 2 : 9. Isa. 64 : 4. 

8 Eev. 21 : 25. ^ Eev. 22 : 17. ^ John 6 : 37. 

34* 399 



18 HEAVEN. 

% 

^^ That is why I am here to-day : to say, 
^ Come.^ I really do believe in heaven; and I 
do so much want every one of these soldier- 
friends to get into it. 

" They have had a hard time of it here ; and, 
even if they were at home and had every thing 
that this world could give, this life is not 
worth the experiment of living^ unless there is 
heaven at the end of it ; and we must start on 
the road that leads to heaven before we leave 
this world, or we can never reach it. 

^^ God has told us who can not go in.^ ^ Know 
ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the 
kingdom of God ?^ 

^^All who do not love God, — all who are not 
washed from sin by the blood of Jesus, — all the 
wicked men who gave us so much trouble here, 
— shall not enter there.^ 

'^ No more Satan or sin to fight with, there ; 
no more temptations for us to strive against; 
nothing that shall ^hurt or destroy in all my 
holy mountain, saith the Lord.'^ 

1 1 Cor. 6 : 9, 10. 

2 Gal. 5 : 15-22. Eev. 22 : 17. Kev. 21 ; 27. 

3 isa. 65 : 25. 
400 



HEAVEN. 19 

"But how can any ont; be su7^e of getting 
there ?^^ asked one who was not a Christian. 

" We have God's word for it, friend ; and if 
we can't believe that, what can we believe ? We 
have our ^ orders' and our ^ pass.' All that we 
need to be sure of is that we are in the way that 
He has opened up for us to it. 

" ^In my Father's house are many mansions/ 
Jesus said to His disciples, when He lived here.^ 
^ I go to prepare a place for you.' And then He 
sent us a little description of what kind of a 
^ place' it w^as/' I said, reading the twenty-first 
chapter, and to the seventh verse of the twenty- 
second chapter, of Revelation. 

" We could not take in a correct idea of that 
glorious ^City,'^ the ^New Jerusalem/ our 
^ home/ if we should look upon that picture of 
it for a lifetime. 

" Who are its its inhabitants ? 

" ^ I beheld, and lo, a great multitude, which 
no man could number, of all nations, and kin- 
dreds, and people, and tongues, stood before 
the throne, and before the Lamb, clothed with 

1 John 14 : 2. 2 Heb. 11 : 10 16. 

401 



20 HEAVEN. 

white robes, and palms in their hands.' ^ ^And I 
heard the voice of harpers harping with their 
harps.' ^ 

"^And I beheld, and I heard the voice of 
many angels round about the throne/ ^ and the 
elders.'^ 

"^And one of the elders answered, saying 
unto me, What are these which are arrayed in 
white robes? and whence came they? 

" ' And I said unto him, Sir, thou knowest. 

"^And he said to me. These are they which 
came out of great tribulation, and have washed 
their robes, and made them white in the blood 
of the Lamb.'^ 

"These were redeemed from among men, 
being the first-fruits unto God, and to the 
Lamb.'^ 

" We shall not only have the society of the 
angels who ministered to our happiness, without 
our knowing it, while we were here,^ but of 
all the good who have ever lived upon the 
earth. Among them we shall find those of our 

1 Kev. 7:9. ^ ^^^^ 14 . 2. 3 j^ev. 5 : 11. 

^ Kev. 7 : 13, 14. ^ i>ey. 14 : 4. 6 Heb. 1 ; 14. 

402 



HEAVEN. 21 

friends who loved God and went to Him, wait- 
ing for us. 

"This little brother will jSnd his mother 
there, when he goes into the City, if she was a 
Christian.^^ 

" Do you think I will hnow her ?" And his 
blue eyes were misty as he asked the question. 

" I think you will. I do not think that we 
will lose our identity there. 

" Paul speaks^ of expecting to hnoio some 
that he knew on earth. He looks forward to 
meeting those whom he had been the means of 
converting to Christ, as his ^ crown of rejoicing^ 
in the presence of the Saviour.^ 

"Jesus speaks^ of the redeemed from all na- 
tions, sitting down with Abraham and Isaac 
and Jacob, in the kingdom of heaven. 

" There is nothing in the Bible to lead out 
the idea that we shall not know our friends 
there; and it is a great deal pleasanter to think 
that we will. 

1 2 Cor. 1 : 14. 

2 1 Thess. 2 : 19. Phil. 4 : 1. Phil. 2 : 16. 

3 Matt. 8 ; 11. Luke 13 : 28, 29. 

403 



22 HEAVEN. 

" WonH it be pleasant to meet those we loved 
and lost down here, and spend an eternity with 
them in heaven T' 

"Yes, indeed it will." 

"But what if some that we loved are not 
there ?'^ asked another. "Don't you think that 
that will make us feel badly ?" 

" I don't think that we can feel sorrow for 
any thing there, friend. ^ God shall wipe away 
all tears/ you know. 

" Sin was the cause of all our trouble down 
here; and when we are purified from that, all 
our liability to be made sorrowful will cease. 

" You know, too, that even here, when the 
heart is full of love to God, troubles fall a great 
deal more lightly on it. The blessed ^ Com- 
forter'^ takes away their power. And there we 
shall be in the presence of that Comforter for- 
ever.^ 

" ^The throne of God and of the Lamb shall 
be in it; and His servants shall serve Him.'^ 

"You will still find something to do for God, 
brother. What it is, we will have to wait until 
1 John 15 : 26. VJ^hiTlITIe! ^ jj^y, 22 : 3. 

404: 



HEAVEN. 23 

we get there to learn ; but it will be a work 
that will not weary us, we know.^ 

^' One thing is worshipping and praising God.^ 

"Don^t you remember how happy you have 
felt, sometimes, when you were worshipping 
God among His children on earth ? How your 
heart went out to Him in love and joy? 

" Oar hearts will be altogether freed from sin 
there, and filled with the love^ and the presence 
of God ; for there ^ The tabernacle of God is 
with men, and He shall dwell with them, and 
God Himself shall be with them, and be their 
God/^ and in His ^ presence^ there is ^ fulness of 
joy,' and at His ^ right hand there are pleasures 
for evermore/^ 

"And here we must stop. Our strongest 
thought cannot give even the most distant idea 
of the joy which that visible presence of God, 
our Father in heaven, the dear Redeemer, and 
the Comforter, will bring to us. 

" We can imagine, faintly, the blissfulness of 

1 Heb. 4:9. 2 ^^^^ 15 . 3^ 4^ 

3 Eph. 3 : 19. Epli. 1 23. * Kev. 21 : 3. 
5 Psalm 16 : 11. 

405 



24 HEAVEN. 

that state in which we shall be forever free from 
sin and suffering of every kind, and shall enjoy 
the blessed society of heaven through an eter- 
nity; but these are only the ' pleasures which are 
at the right hand of God/ 

"You have seen men looking through a 
coloured glass at the sun. 

" They could not look at its brightness with 
the naked eye: its rays would blind them. 

" So on earth we can only see God as through 
a glass, darkly.^ ^ We can know so little of 
Him, except through a medium; and if even 
here, when our hearts are filled with the love of 
God in Christ, ' in whom, though now we see 
Him not, yet believing' we are made to ^rejoice 
with joy unspeakable and full of glory,' ^ how 
infinitely greater will the happiness be when ' we 
shall see Him face to face^! 

" As we now are, no man can look on God 
and live;^ the brightness of His glory would 
strike him dead ; but before we come into His 
presence in heaven, we shall be changed to suit 

1 1 Cor. 13 : 12. 2 1 pet. l : 8. 

3 Exodus 33 ; 20. 
406 



HEAVEN. 25 

His glory/ — changed, so that that presence and 
glory will be our highest enjoyment, beside 
which every other joy will seem faint and dim. 

" We do not knov/ what the nature of that 
change in us will be ; we cannot understand it 
now; it is a mystery^ that we cannot know until 
we feel it; for 4t doth not yet appear what we 
shall be ; but we know that when God^ in Christ 
' appears^ to us, ' we shall be like Him ; for we 
shall see Him as He is/^ and find our highest 
heaven in Him. 

'^ Oh, what a presence and what a home that will 
be to spend forever in ! Is it not strange that 
every one does not seek it above their chief good? 

*^How can any one help trying to gain 
heaven? Don't you think that the angels must 
look down in wonder as they see men turn 
from it for the sake of a few short years of (so- 
called) pleasure, which never yet has satisfied 
them, and never will, — see them have such a 
weary, restless time on earth, and then lose 
heaven too ! 

"We do not really believe in heaven as we 

1 Kom. 8 : 29. 2 1 q^^^ 15 . 51.54^ 3 1 j^hn 3 : 2, 

35 407 



26 HEAVEN. 

should, or we should look forward to it more, and 
be more earnest not only in trying to win it for 
ourselves, but in persuading others to seek it 
too. 

"Parents would try more earnestly to lead 
the little feet that God has given them to guide, 
into the ' way' ^ that leads there, as soon as they 
were able to walk in it. 

" How earnestly we would plead with those 
we love, to go with us ! How we would delight 
to help them on the w^ay ! And even strangers, 
as they met, would talk about, and point each 
other to, that ^heavenly City,' and plead with 
sinners to turn and enter with them into the 
^joy of their Lord.'"^ 

It was pleasant to talk of heaven with those 
who had just started on the road to it, or those 
who might have years of travel yet ; but it was 
pleasanter far to talk about it with one who w^as 
almost there. 

It may seem strange, but some of the hap- 
piest hours of my life have been passed by the 

1 John 14 : 6. Mark 10 : 14. Prov. 22 : 6. 

2 Matt. 25 : 21, 23. 
408 



HEAVEN. 27 

bedside of the dying Christian, as we read and 
talked about what was awaiting him in glory. 

It brought heaven very near^ and made it 
seem very real, to talk about it with one who 
would be walking through the streets of the 
^^ golden City^^ ^ in a few hours, or, it might be, 
moments. 

"The Lamh was the light of it," to their 
souls, even more than to the convalescents; 
lighting up the dark valley^ while they were 
passing through it; the central point of the 
attractions beyond. 

" Precious Jesus !" " Blessed Saviour !" " My 
Jesus !'^ " I will soon see Him !" — " soon be 
where He is !" And the light would spring into 
their eyes at the thought that He was waiting 
for them on the " other side," and when their 
eyes closed on this world they would open 
them first on Hirriy — safe in the shelter of His 
arms.^ 

At such times that dear Redeemer seemed 

very near, — so near that I could almost /ee^ His 

presence, although He had not come for me. 

1 Kev. 21 : 18, 21. 2 pgalm 23 : 4. 3 John 14 : 3. 

409 



28 HEAVEN. 

Blessed religion of Jesus^ that gives such 
comfort when all other comforts fail ! 

Blessed hope, Avhich grows stronger and 
brighter w^hen all other hopes have passed 
away! 

How many times I have thought, ^^O 
Death, lohere is thy sting ? O grave, where is 
thy victory ?^^^ as I watched my soldier-boys 
pass, joyfully and triumphantly, from the sound 
of my voice, to listen to the music of the harps 
around the throne ! 

How many times I have seen manifested the 
infinite love and wisdom which devised such a 
plan of salvation for ruined, guilty man ! 

No other plan could have been so suited to 
the wants of all, — suited to the poor and the 
rich, the high and the lowly, the learned and the 
ignorant, the wise and the simple, the strong 
and the weak, the sick and the convalescent. 

What other '' plan'^ could you have carried to 
the sick and dying men ? 

^^Do good w^orks''? They were not able. 

^^Do penance"? They had not the strength. 

^ 1 Cor. 15 : 55. 
410 



HEAVEN. 29 

" Trust in ordinances'^ ? They could not have 
them there. 

But none were too weak to '' look to Jesus.'' 

" Believe on the Lord Jesus." " Give your- 
self to Him. Trust Him, and He will take 
you into heaven." 

Precious Jesus! Dear Eedeemer! to open 
up such a " way" for poor, lost sinners to the 
New Jerusalem, — our Home ! 

'^ Blessed are they that do His commandments, 
that they may have a right to the tree of life, and 
may enter in through the gates into the cityj^ ^ 

1 Eev. 22 : 14. 

35^ 411 



THE END. 



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